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  1. closetojumping

    closetojumping

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    texifornia

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    BurntOrange&White

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    Huckleberry

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Popular Content

Showing content with the highest reputation since 12/02/24 in all areas

  1. If he had survived, I wonder if UnitedHealthcare would have denied his claim
    102 points
  2. When Dabo Swinney was named Clemson's full time head coach in December of 2008, he did the most Mack Brown thing possible that a Mack Brown Jr. type could do. He started calling around the HC coaching fraternity, asking to come visit and sit down with various HCs across the land. Many turned sweet, young Dabo down outright, as they were too busy with their own offseasons or bowl prep to care enough to help the hillbilly upstart and his staff. Still, one man did answer the call, and invited Dabo and his staff down to visit, right smack dab in the middle of Fiesta Bowl game prep - Mack Brown. They all spent 3 days in Austin, gladhanding and chumming it up. Swinney's spent some time this week with the local Clemson press talking about that event and how happy he is to be heading back to Austin. After all, he spoke before the SMU game of preparing to make a run to be the first 3-loss national title winning coach. He thinks he has Clemson peaking at the right time (nevermind South Carolina whipping them in the trenches less than a month ago) and they're ready. Running into Swinney's open armed optimism is a thin-skinned and panicked Longhorn netdom, who have spent the last week+ manufacturing ways in which they need to be worried about this upcoming, first-of-its-kind home playoff game against the underdog Tigers. Having watched a small and slow Clemson team play backyard bully in a truly abysmal ACC all year, I can do nothing but smirk and mock each of these plaintive whines on the boards, as I know Texas is about to stomp a mudhole in Clemson's ass. "But closetojumping, Dabo's a wizard and he's won the playoffs twice before! Sarkisian just eats his own boogers on the sidelines in postseason games!" While it's true that Swinney has won two national titles, those days are long in the rearview mirror. Clemson only made its way to these playoffs through the backdoor, by beating an AAC team with too much hype. This Clemson team has some future NFL players within its ranks. Mafah, if he hasn't taken too many bullets, seems like he'll be drafted. It's early, but TJ Moore and Bryant Wesco look like future stars. Antonio Williams, an older Clemson WR, is the current star and will get next level looks. Briningstool at TE is good but not great, yet he's going to the Senior Bowl and will be drafted. Defensively, Barrett Carter, Sammy Moore, TJ Carter, and Peter Woods will all likely play on Sundays. Peter Woods gets a lot of hype for a dude with like 21 tackles and 3 sacks in 7 or 8 games this year. Oh well. From there? Slim pickings. That's the difference between now and years past. Some of the players I named are true freshmen. One is a true sophomore. They're not loaded with upperclassmen ready to go high in the draft. They have upperclassmen good enough to go somewhere in the draft, and that's it. They have an average OL as usual, with a couple of OTs who could go in the mid-late rounds, but they're never been a power in that key personnel area and this year is no different. Meanwhile, Texas is loaded with draftable players and future NFL high round picks who cannot be drafted yet. While Sarkisian's bowl and playoff record, thus far, do not inspire confidence, this roster talent should. If anyone honestly believes that the slack-jawed yokel roaming Clemson's sidelines with his 1000 yard stare and openly breathing through his mouth is some sort of X's and O's threat, they've not watched much Clemson. "Now come on, CTJ, have you seen Texas' redzone offense and special teams play?" Setting aside the futility of the raging Arch vs Ewers debate, featuring masturbatory fantasies about Sarkisian casually dropping in a complete red zone playset for Manning in the postseason, I think there are reasons for promise and optimism for Texas in the RZ this game. While Texas has been mediocre scoring in the RZ due to, mostly, Bert Auburn gargling more balls than Mia Khalifa, Clemson's RZ defense has also mostly been dogshit this season, allowing points on more than 83% of their drives. This isn't Clemson from 2018 - their front seven is good but not great. They can be run on and they're not elite on pass defense either. Texas needs the offensive line to show up wearing men's jock straps underneath their uniforms and not in the pink panties they wore against the UGA front. Do that, have even Decent Quinn Ewers show up with them, and Texas gets to 20+ on the offensive side. What about the rest of it, STs included? Clemson actually has substantially worse STs than Texas in most facets. They've had a bunch of FGs missed and blocked. They do basically nothing in the return game and just lost their main return guy for the season against SMU. Their coverage teams are average to boot. All we need here on special teams is for Silas Bolden to not be a complete fucking lunatic and for someone to bring some positive karma in Auburn's direction by shaving his head and keeping him away from Scott Norwood and Ray Finkel. "I don't know, closetojumping. I don't like their running game or turnover margin advantage." The Clemson running game has been mentioned on this board and OTF as a source of concern. There's always going to be an affinity for Klubnik on the boards because of the Westlake alumni honk network. "Cade's over there being whiteboy awesome again! He's a dual threat, by gawd!" Right. Look, the Clemson running game is in trouble. It's not just that Texas is a truly elite defense, but their personnel is also a problem. Klubnik's nothing special and easily spied. Mafah is seriously banged up and can't handle 20+ carries without serious wear and tear - their own writers are talking about this. The back-up just tore his ACL. The only defense within range of what they're about to face was Georgia's or SCar's and both shut them down on the ground. As to TO concerns, part of why Clemson doesn't turn the ball over is due to the laughable schedule and competition they've played. In Clemson's 3 losses, Klubnik threw 1 TD and 2 picks. The turnover margin in those 3 games? 0. Clemson's feasting on TOs in their 9 wins against mostly overmatched competition. The Clemson offensive game plan is usually to protect Klubnik from himself and work the short passing game while attempting to pound both he and Mafah until the weaker opponent breaks down. Against better teams, the Clemson running game has been held in check and they've been forced to try to let Klubnik and the young WR corps, along with Briningstool, win the game. They're 2-3 in those contests, with wins against an overmatched SMU on the last play of the game and Pitt in the final minute of the game when Pitt failed to spy Klubnik adequately and let him go streaking. "Sure, CTJ, but we've never played these guys and their brand terrifies me in my feelings." Clemson has beaten 10 teams this season with a combined record of 54-66. That includes an 11-2 SMU team that played virtually no one and shit itself twice against decent competition. I already discussed the two teams they beat with a winning record - a wildly overrated 11-2 SMU and a team in a disastrous state of collapse at the time of play (and continuing now) in 7-5 Pitt. The rest of their competition has either been dogshit that they obliterated, like a 5-7 FCS Citadel, or teams that paired up with them well and kicked their ass, like Georgia and Louisville. If you watched Clemson at all this year, you know that they looked slow and small against SCar and Georgia. They looked great against Wake Forest and North Carolina State. How do you expect them to match up against Texas, on the road? I'm thinking mudhole, to the tune of Texas 27 - Clemson 10. I'm not real sure how Clemson climbs above 13, even if Bad Quinn Ewers and Evil Bert Auburn show up and try to give the damned thing away. Thoughts? Hook'em
    98 points
  3. Watching Georgia melt down on the Dawgs247 board is absolutely delicious. The whining and bitching about money is so glorious that it's starting to give me a headache. These motherfuckers have been buying players since day 1 of Smart's arrival and now they're bitching about big bad Texas. Sorry about us deciding that we, too, have a payroll to meet and it's ... um ... a lot bigger than yours, you truly poor bastards.
    85 points
  4. Terry on the OTF Livestream just said that he decided against USC (where he was once committed) because of the taxes, lol
    71 points
  5. 67 points
  6. I admire the talent that's been built up in Austin, but I honestly think ASU has got you beat. Unless you're talking about football players. Then Texas comes out on top.
    67 points
  7. Randolph Duke is doing fine. I'm just laughing my ass off at what aggy has become.
    66 points
  8. Not usually going to quote this guy, but he makes a great point
    64 points
  9. We didnā€™t win the sec in our first year. The zebras didnā€™t want us to. Burt Auburn didnā€™t want us to. We had about 10 things go against us- any of which went down differently, and weā€™d have hoisted the trophy. We didnā€™t do that (or have the ball bounce our way, or the whistles in some situations) but we got rewarded for a a good season with the coveted 5 seed. clemson at home, Arizona state in Atlanta and then Oregon, TN or Ohio State in Dallas for the shot to play for it all in the first time under this 12 team format. Texas is as good as anyone in college football this year. Our floor is really high because the defense is pretty great. I think our ceiling is high enough to win it all against who we are looking at playing. Lets freaking do this boys.
    63 points
  10. Need their depth chart at WR but also HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
    62 points
  11. You guys were worthy of a bye. Worthy of CFP. Great coach. Skattebo may be the toughest dude to play CFB in the last ten years. Nothing to be ashamed of. Respect from this Longhorn fan.
    59 points
  12. A fun United story: had a client a few years ago with some kind of rare leukemia (which had nothing to do with the case we were handling). He finds out that thereā€™s a new treatment that is about to be approved but is available and his doctors got him on the list. It also costs like $500,000 and of course United denies the claim. Since we were already representing him we agreed to handle the denial appeal which we had to do in arbitration. 3 arbitrators, we pick one, United picks one, and one we agree upon. Weā€™re told that United picked the same hack arbitrator they always pick so we assume weā€™re already in the hole. Arbitration lasts a couple of days, United has no defense other than ā€œfuck this guy heā€™s dead already and we donā€™t wanna pay.ā€ Arbitrators deliberate for maybe 15 minutes, come back in, and Unitedā€™s chosen arbitrator proceeds to chew out United (or rather their lawyers) for denying the claim and that every person who touched this claim at United should be ashamed and gave United 48 hours to approve the claim. Client got the treatment and is doing just fine now. Hooray insurance companies!
    59 points
  13. This thread could very well be about how, despite several buffoons on this board loudly complaining otherwise, this former walk-on safety has been the best player on the field for short stretches despite playing on one of the most talented Texas defenses in recent memory. Or for the Blake Gideon and Dylan Haines jokes. Frankly itā€™s unbelievable this thread title is said without irony or sarcasm. But I also wanted to highlight and memorialize Taaffeā€™s postgame remarks in response to that heinous game day sign, because the remarks demonstrate remarkable character and why he is an exemplary representative of this program. For the uninformed, some red ass ā€œblue collar salt of the earthā€ ag inexplicably brought a sign to College Gameday making fun of deceased Texas walk on Jake Ehlinger, who tragically passed away in a fentanyl-related accident. Obviously this behavior doesnā€™t represent the entire Texas A&M fanbase. Most alumni would condemn this once understanding the context, and many already have (although I am sure everyone here has met exceptions and can debate in another thread). But unlike most game day signs and taunts, this one actually provokes a reaction. Austin is now a big city but it is still a small community in a lot of ways. The Ehlingers live and work here. If youā€™ve met this family and know what they have been through in the past, that gameday sign gets even more odious. So in the postgame press conference Michael Taaffe somehow trumps his cathartic performance on the field with remarks far better than anything I could have come up with: ā€œI want to say I feel sorry for the person that posted that sign. I feel sorry for him because I don't know what he's going through, how much he's dealing with in life. To think that that was a good idea, to think that was OK, to think that was appropriate for anything, no matter what rivalry. I just wanted to make that clear." The national media and our fanbase will quickly move on from this win because at the end of the day we just beat a middling 8-4 SEC team. But I felt that Michael Taaffeā€™s maturity and passion deserves special recognition and it shouldnā€™t get buried in a game thread. Proud heā€™s a Longhorn.
    57 points
  14. This is quite the fucking surprise.... @closetojumping Gerry Hamilton Zelus Hicks Key Note Not only did Texas 4-star++ signee Zelus Hicks (Carrollton, Ga./High) reclassify from 2026 to 2025. But he's also been taking AP classes throughout high school and has the credits to graduate high school this month. Hicks, 6-2, 185-pounds, will be moving to Austin January 13 and go through spring practice.
    57 points
  15. Nowhere near enough love for this guy. Has been a rock all year for the good guys. šŸ¤˜ great pick up.
    56 points
  16. My 8 and 6 year old daughters were having the time of their lives. I parked in west campus and walked to the stadium. 1.) I pointed out all the buildings as we crossed campus that I went into and told them what was inside. 8 year old: Daddy this is like a tour! We didnā€™t know we were getting a tour too! 2.) Bevo Blvd and the midway food was great. Girls loved watching the band go into the stadium while eating a burger 3.) Girls were kind of confused on the first chant of Texas and fight while walking up to our seats in the ramps to the upper deck. So I instantly belt out ā€˜tex.. usssss!ā€™ And when every one yelled ā€˜fightā€™ their eyes lit up like I was a super hero. Of course when we got to the OU sucks part their eyes went wider as they are not allowed to say ā€˜sucksā€™ at the house. 4.) They loved the pregame flyover 5.) The actual game was the low point for them. 6.) Drone show killed 7.) I made them sing the eyes or at least hold up their horns during it. 8.) Iā€™m pretty sure throughout the game a whole bucket of popcorn was consumed by each. Plus a box of m&ms in each of their popcornsā€¦. Then the dip and dotsā€¦. And a pretzel. So when at 1:30 am I woke up to crying and two kids that independently puked the bed, I knew that I flew ever too closely to the sun on a completely badass day. There are no free lunches. And chocolate puke mixed with popcorn kernels is not fun to rinse and pretreat before throwing into the washer. I can do without that again.
    54 points
  17. Moore is the Moore replacement. Heā€™s coming back barring something super unforseen
    54 points
  18. been at the in-laws for the last 5 days, and they're mostly aggy although some more than others. BiL is the hardcore one that usually has some thinly veiled comment about Sark or dildos. the others usually chime in when BiL gets it started. well. so far, i've seen zero aggy gear. nothing. not even a ball cap. no aggy gifts to each other. no talk about their "revenge" game. no talk about college football whatsoever. not even bomc themed discussions. in fact, they have no interest in any bowl games whatsoever much less playoffs. fucking glorious. šŸ¤˜
    53 points
  19. Ever since it happened, I've been puzzled by how a seemingly pretty mortal Georgia team came in to Austin and beat us by double digits. I wanted to refresh my memory on what happened, and understand what it means for our rematch tomorrow. So I bit the bullet and rewatched the entire thing, taking a lot of notes. What follows is a drive-by-drive recap and my takeaways. First off, here's the game on YouTube: 1st Half Drives: 2nd Half Drives: OK, so what did I learn from subjecting myself to this? I thought we were physically outmatched on the OL, but it wasn't as bad as I remembered. A lot of the pressure they got on Quinn was due to intelligent blitz schemes, or miscommunications on our part. They also did a good job of keeping tight coverage and limiting Quinn's options. That said, Quinn did not play well. His interception was a bad throw, and he got away with a couple others. He threw at covered receivers several times. He was responsible for the self-sack deep in our own end, which really hurt us. There were a couple of opportunities for him to scramble for yardage that he didn't take. Mykel Williams in particular played absolutely out of his mind. We had no answer for him. Special teams hurt us and really contributed to the field position difference. I think we got too cute at times with the horizontal passing and running game. I feel like we saw this some against aggy as well. Georgia's defense was too fast to be beaten like that. They capitalized on our turnovers, and we largely couldn't on theirs, with the exception of the 3rd quarter interception. A big reason is because almost all of the turnovers happened deep in our end of the field. Our D can play with them. They had one sustained drive (that admittedly came at a crucial time), and that's about it. I feel somewhat better about tomorrow after rewatching. A lot of the negative things that we did can and should be cleaned up. We need Quinn to take care of the ball, special teams to not be a net negative, and Sark to not get too reliant on the east-west game, and we'll be ok. I expect that going into a hostile environment at College Station last weekend and coming away with the W will help our guys not feel like the moment is too big for them. Hook 'em, fuck Georgia, ou sucks, let's fucking go.
    52 points
  20. 52 points
  21. Wrong. An Asian Poon War is exactly what I want.
    52 points
  22. I edited a...different version: Subject: Thank You, Aggies ā€“ A Night to Remember at Kyle Field Howdy, Aggies! Iā€™m not a Texas fan, but Iā€™ll admit I came into Saturday nightā€™s game between the Aggies and Longhorns believing Texas would win. Iā€™m new to the SEC, and this was my first time experiencing a game at the legendary Kyle Field. When the opportunity came up to be at this game, I couldnā€™t pass it up. Let me tell you: it was worth every second. From the moment my family and I stepped onto campus, we were blown away by the energy of the Aggie community. The stadium atmosphere was unique, unlike anything we had ever seen. The experience inside Kyle Field was on another level. The crowd noise, the cheers, the precision of your traditionsā€”it was absolutely mesmerizing. But I was most impressed by the hospitality I experienced in your stadium. Every time I approached a crowd of Aggies (and it was crowded in that stadium that night!) they politely cleared the way and let me pass through. I quickly understood why Aggies have a much deserved reputation for Southern hospitality. I've never seen anything like it. I can assure you that I will never forget my first visit to Aggieland and Kyle Field, and I look forward to welcoming those kind, accommodating Aggies to visit us in the future. Thank you for the unforgettable experience, Aggie family. Yā€™all have something incredibly "special" in College Station. - Quintrevion Wisner
    52 points
  23. If y'all want to make this an OnlyFans girl battle instead of a football game, ASU is going to kick your fucking ass.
    50 points
  24. If it makes you feel any better we're #1. Both in recruiting and in the standings.
    50 points
  25. 49 points
  26. Nice game fuckers. That's an extremely balanced and deep team Texas has. I thought Clemson played hard and made it a good game, but some of Sark's gambles played into that as well. I think y'all did enough to get the dumbfuck defensive coordinator fired, so thank you for that. Go win the damn thing
    49 points
  27. I signed up for ā€œthisā€ site in 2011. I wonder what I wouldā€™ve thought if someone came up to me then and said ā€œyou know one day thereā€™s going to be over 5 pages in a thread on here about you giving handjobs for defensive tackle transfersā€.
    49 points
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