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Thank god the guy who is always wrong is here to clear things up. I feel much better now.

I’d like to do a call-in with you, me, and Derka as the round table. Turn it into a longhorn variety show. Have a political segment where jimmyjazz and Hugo Stiglitz alternate between shouting and sobbing at Johnny Sack, who lights his cigar by setting a $100 on fire and holding it to the end of the ciggy, and just generally acts smug to whatever jimmyjazz and Stiglitz are saying. Have a recruiting section where Sydney Carton basically just screams at callers while sarvanaash sits quietly in the sidekick chair and bites his fingernails. Have a current affairs segment where brisketexan attempts to read at least one headline before exploding into a tear-filled, red-faced tirade about the decline of humanity. I’d close every show by challenging the worst caller to a fight and telling Derka that Shaka Smart is a coaching genius. I like where you’re going with this.

Unfortunately, they're all hosted by imgur.

So, just questions about the weather then? Oh wait. I forgot to read rule #3.

i have good news and bad news. Good news: Wilson is not interested in Aggy. Bad news: Wilson is still solid to OSU unless Urbs is fired. In Texas news, yes, Mehringer told Wilson he was better than all of our current receivers right now and would be a starter at Z or X from day 1. It did not have the intended effect on Wilson or his parents. Good thing for Texas that Coach Naivar is Wilson's lead recruiter and has a great relationship with Wilson and his parents. I believe in Naivar. But think we need a little help from OSU along the way and beating USC would probably open the right eyes and ears.

Your boyfriend?

God as my witness i thought they could fly.

Drew Mehringer decided to make an example of Collin Johnson last year because he apparently, in Mehringer's world, got too full of himself and wasn't "aligned". Being buddies with Foreman didn't help him. The WR unit got the worst of the 2017 coaching premise that they were going to beat the shit out of the team until the entitlement wore away. The side effects of that approach included Hemphill-Mapps getting completely disenfranchised and randomly suspended on multiple occasions to the point where he checked out from attending classes by November; Devin Duvernay negging the program to recruits on official visits; and Collin Johnson losing track of which way was up and not knowing where the next kick to his crotch was coming from by the staff. The near total team revolt ahead of the Texas Bowl was a wake up to many on the staff, including Herman. Some lessons were learned, but not all of them. During film session with WR recruits and their dads this spring, allegedly, Mehringer made a point of talking shit about the existing talent, including Johnson, to the tune of turning the families off completely, or damn near so. I'm interested in seeing whether the coaches have improved on their personnel choices on offense this year. Last year was a fucking joke in term of selecting personnel. The number of empty sets in which we slotted out a non-functioning TE instead of rotating in another WR was astonishing. The amount of carries and snaps Kyle Porter received because he had "the right attitude" sent the message to everyone, fans included, that the best players won't often play. Naashon Hughes doing nothing for hours on the field while others rode pine. Taking forever to get Gary Johnson steadily on the field. The WR rotation overall was a fucking joke. I keep waiting to see Kyle Porter start creeping up the depth chart due to some amorphous notion associated to team spirit or "picking up the rush", which were used last year, even as he often failed to pick up the rush. If that dude remains 5th on the depth chart, and we hear about freshman getting 1st and 2nd team snaps on offense all over the field right up to Maryland, I'll start to think maybe we turned a corner.

All this time I thought SydneyCarton and CJT were heterosexual males.

Axis backstrap:

*Segues Segways are what Mark Mangino and CTJ take to get from the couch to their Wareheim rooms.

Same here. EMAW trying to be the biggest dumbass and orca comes flying in with a hold my beer

EMA just got out-technologied by Armybrat, whose first technology experience was using flint to create fire. That's a pretty bad ass-whooping.

So our parents ran up the bill so that we can figure out how to pay for it. Good job Boomers.

The bar isn't 2010-2017 for the University of Texas. Once you get your head around that, your perspective and expectations are going to get a lot healthier. It's been a miserable 8 years, but I refuse to change my expectations. I was there when we ascended the pinnacle and there is no feeling like it for a fan. This is a program with every possible advantage within its reach - it's not my job as a supporter to lower my standards or expectations because Mack Brown got tired, entitled, and lazy, and Charlie Strong couldn't find his ass from a hole in the ground while wondering around campus with a 1,000 yard stare on his face. I'll take where Herman appears to be headed with this program, but his current wounds in recruiting are self-inflicted.

Can't wait for the Merhinger apologists to explain away why Tim Beck having to take over the recruitment of Higgins is indicative of nothing. I'm sure it had nothing to do with him Shit Talking Colin Johnson to Higgins, Wilson, and their families. In completely an entirely unrelated news, long time Texas fan Garrett Wilson would basically run to Texas aTm sight unseen before he'd go play for Drew Merhinger. On the other hand, I'm hoping Beck hopping into the recruitment is the final signal that Herman realizes FauxHawk is a bad fit for what this program needs to succeed.

Damn smut peddlers.

Here's a short clip of Giles on an in-home visit:

You are, without question, the dumbest motherfucker on this board, as you were on shaggy. The stupid absolutely hurts to read.

WHOOOOOP!!

My gawd, we’re a beaten-down, miserable fan base.

Fuck you, you Tim Nunez apologizing piece of shit. Get the Carl Reese signed photo off your office wall.

Yes, fuck it. That's your answer to everything. CONDOLENCES!

Bro, that's not how solitary works.

That's grade A bitchassery there, Hager and GJ are gonna end piggies season again, he'll have to wait for a season Texas isn't on the schedule.

Tldr. Try a snappy meme, perhaps.

y'all 'member how the deficit was why Obama was the worstest president ever, and we were in crisis, and only the GOP could save us? I 'member. I 'member how the alarm about the massive deficit created in response to the 2008 financial crisis was legitimately scary. Then I remember folks ignoring the significant downward trend starting in 2012. And now, I notice this: If you'd have told the deficit hawks who were so vigilant under Obama that in 2016, one of the candidates would be putting us on track for that chart, they'd have shouted "WHATEVER YOU DO, DON'T VOTE FOR THAT CANDIDATE!" But, he's a Repub. So, MAGA, and deficits are now a GOOD thing, because MAGA. The utterly de-pantsing levels of hypocrisy here are definitely chuckle-worthy.

bagman. The word you're looking for is bagman.

I think Thelma and louise’s estrogen laden power tripping is the perfect pic for a brisket post.

Fucking cheater. Pick someone other than Kansas as your victim.

They are resting their cankles till the next black guy gets into the White House.

Who cares? He's doing a shitty job, boot his ass to the curb and get someone who can get the job done.

clint hurtt

Can't wait till November once Beatty gets fired and hired by Herman.

I had a meeting with Sydney a few weeks ago. This guy is in his late-30's and shows up rocking a fauxhawk and horned rimmed glasses. It was surreal.

A harder sell? Jimbos biggest success was nearly 7 years ago, while Herman was a big part of a more recent national championship, beat Jimbo head to head with lesser talent, and even had a better record last year than Jimbos FSU team filled with back to back to back highly rated recruiting classes. Jimbo's FSU team limped into a bowl game they shouldn't have played in, aggy lost to a mid-pack ACC basketball school while we beat the team with the top offense in the SEC to end the season. I'll concede aggy will have a better recruiting class than us this year because of the new coach bump, but if it continues...Houston, we have a problem.

We CAN show high school football. We OWN the fucking property. All of it. Every division. The entire state. Fuck aggy, they're the ones who went postal when we first floated the idea. They're gone. FUCK THEM. WALL2FUCKINGWALL High School all week long. Replay ALL THE GAMES. Have a weekly one-hour coaches show for every district in every division with skype interviews conducted from the LHN broadcast center. WEPPONIZE IT.

As a Tceh tard, I'd like to come to the defense of my undergrad alma mater. During my time there, most of my friends and acquaintances were either progressive liberals or apolitical. Some were also quite brilliant dirty hippies, including a couple math majors. I also formed friendships with a shitload of foreign students from all over the world, many of whom I suspect have greatly contributed to the advancement of the West Texas and American economies and social well-being by working very hard in scientific and medical fields. Sure, Tech has more than its fair share of troglodyte paleo-conservatives but most of them are B school bros and frat douches from DFW who weren't actually there to get an education. Slorch, I've come to your defense in the past due to some of our shared experiences growing up and being proud Red Raiders. Today, though, you earned every bit of scorn that you got.

— So why did things change so drastically with Leal, Williams, Richardson and Wright. Each recruitment is different, but I think it's safe to sayTexas finished second in all those recruitments. Fucking EJ is stealing my bit.

tbh, Mike was one of the first people to start hyping up Dylan Wright. Credit where credit is due.

The one for your mom is ready