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  • Pancho gets pulled over by a Lafayette, LA narcotics officer


    Pancho

    I got pulled over by a narcotics officer in Lafayette, LA last night as I was driving back to Houston from reffing a basketball game.  The officer (insert bro name here) said I drove on the middle lane lines at least 3ft on both my left and right and that's why he pulled me over.  Now, I can legit believe this because I was definitely on my phone trying to pull up at podcast at that point and was halfway paying attention. 

    He asked to see my license, and of course I already have it on the visor to just easily pull out and make it not look like I'm reaching for something.  He goes back to his car for a good 5 minutes then comes back to ask me to step out of the vehicle.  He starts asking me where I was going and where was I coming from--the usual.  Then he immediately asks do I have any drugs or narcotics in the car.  

    Me: "No sir."

    Narcotics Bro: "You sure?"

    Me: "Yes, I'm sure sir."

    He does the above but asks me about any potential guns in the car or any large sums of cash. 

    Me: "No sir."

    Narcotics Bro: "You sure about that?"

    Me: "Yes sir, no guns, knives, or any weapons. I don't carry cash--cards only."

    At this point, I could tell Narcotics Bro was getting a little edgy because he just knew he caught me in something.  He goes back to his car to do something with my license again (I presume) and this takes a while.  He then comes back to me, and I could tell he thought I was a dumbass. He asks about suitcases in the car (how many), if anyone other than myself packed my bags, or if I had traveled with anyone else on my trip at any point.  The answer was clearly no to all of those questions.

    Narcotics Bro: "Yeah, so your story doesn't quite add up, so I'm going to need to search your vehicle.  Do you mind if I do that?"

    Me: "I don't consent to that, so no you can't search my car."

    Narcotics Bro:  "Is there a reason why you don't want me to search your car?"

    Me: "No, no reason but you don't have a warrant to do that, so no.  And actually I'm getting a little scared here."

    Narcotics Bro: "Why, because you know you have some weed or pills in there?"

    Me: "Nah, I'm scared because I'm Black and you're a White officer and we both know how these situations typically end up."

    Narcotics Bro:  "Dude, I understand.  My body cam is right here, and I have a Black Wife!"

    Me: giphy.gif

    He goes back to his car again for forever while I'm counting semis going by, and he comes back to tell me since I don't agree to a search then the K9 unit will have to be called.  I say gleefully "okay" because I know I don't have jack shit in my car.  I'm in a rental (shoutout Avis) with Georgia plates so I think this didn't help.  He asks to see the agreement and I give it to him.  He looks it over for a few minutes then says "hey, how much did you pay for this rental" and I'm thinking bro, you have the agreement in your fucking hand.  But nonetheless, I blurt out the exact amount.  He looks on the agreement, sees I'm right, and I can see he's getting frustrated.  He later asks why I don't take my own car, which I can assume is just because he's trying to catch me in something to which I response "because it's brand new and I don't want to put the miles on it."

    K9 Asian bro comes, and Cujo is barking like crazy.  He talks with Narcotics Bro for a bit then the search begins.  I see K9 bros face and it looks like "you called me out here for this waste of time shit" type faces.  I'm smiling like a mofo because Narcotics is about to look like a fool.  While Cujo is circling the car, I start to make small talk about the weather, Lafayette eateries, the traffic, and just other bullshit because I know he now knows he's just wasted both of ours time.  3 circles for Cujo, no dice, and back to the unit he goes.  Asian K9 officer with the look of "waste of time" on his face walking back.

    He then says he's just gonna let me go with a warning and that it sounds like I was just tired, something I told him when he first stopped me.  He's had my license the entire time but before he gives it back, he holds it up one last time, shines his flashlight on it and just twists the license in his hand--this goes on for 30 seconds.  I'm sitting here thinking that if my license was fake, you would have seen that 25 minutes ago when you did the exact same thing. He hands it back then suggests I go to the Exxon on the next exit and get a red bull or some bangs (wtf???) to drink so I can wake up a little. 

    Long story short--I'm definitely not traumatized by this situation, but I'm still a little irked that my complete, 100% honest story to him gets a response of basically "I think you're lying so I need to search your car."  I'm damn near 40--I ain't got time to be hauling shitty ass weed across state lines. 

     

    Just wanted to get this off my chest.  It still feels like I dreamt this as I can't believe it happened.  Not sure what to think really. 


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    1 minute ago, dcar00 said:

    eh, partying in New Orleans is pretty fun.  haven't been in a few years though.

    So? Tell me about last night.

    Are you kidding me? Are you pulling my leg?

    - So? - So tits out to here.

    - Some 20 years old. - You must be fooling. You devil.

    You think she hadn't gone the route?

    - She knew the route, did she? - Are you kidding? She wrote the route.

    - So where am l? - Probably at the Pancake House.

    I'm over at the Pancake House, and this chick walks over to the cash register.

    19 or 20 years old. She wants to buy a pack of Viceroys.

    She gets the smokes and says she forgot her purse up in her room.

    - Was she a pro? - At that age?

    At this point, we don't know.

    So we sit down and get coffee and she says:

    "Come up to my room and I'll pay you back for the smokes."

    - You're shitting me. Was she a pro? - At this point, we don't know.

    She says, "sit down, you want a drink?" I say, "what have you got?" "Bourbon."

    Then what shot does she pull?

    A) she says: "I think I'll take a shower".

    - And B) she says: "Then let's fuck." - She said that?

    - Was she a pro? - At this point, we don't know.

    So I say: "I'll join you in the shower, if you have no objections".

    So in we go, and does she have a body? Are you kidding me? The tits. The legs.

    Are you fucking fooling me? The ass on this broad.

    - Young ass? - Well, young broad, young ass.

    So we get out and towel each other off in his and her full glory.

    While we're toweling off, I flick the towel at her, -

    - and by accident, I hit her on the ass, and we got this big red mark.

    I'm all sorry and so forth, but what does this broad do -

    - but let out a squeal of pleasure that would fucking kill a horse.

    What the hell, I'm liberal, so I heave a chair at her.

    - Draw blood? - Not yet. But what does she say?

    "Wait a minute!" She pulls out a suitcase from under the bed -

    - with a World War Il flak suit.

    Zip, zip, she gets into the flak suit, we get down on the bed.

    - What are you doing? - Fucking!

    - But she's in a flak suit. - She leaves the zipper open.

    But the shot is, every thirty seconds or so, -

    - she wants me to go "BOOM" at the top of my lungs.

    So we're humping and pumping, and every once in a while, I go "boom".

    In the middle of everything, she turns on a little tape recorder.

    I don't know what the shot is. All of a sudden I hear:

    I'm pumping away, the tape recorder is making airplane noises.

    Every once in a while, I go "boom", and the broad starts going crazy.

    She's moaning and groaning -

    - and screaming, "Red Dog One to Red Dog Squadron".

    Suddenly, she screams, "Wait!" and pulls out a five-gallon jerry can.

    It's full of gasoline. She splashes it over the walls -

    - pulls out a zippo and "whoosh", the room goes up in flames.

    So the tape recorder is going ... , the room is full of smoke -

    - and the broad screams, "Do it now, for the love of Christ!"

    So I look at the broad, and I figure, fuck this nonsense.

    I struggle into my shorts, make it to the elevator.

    The place is filled with smoke.

    The elevator arrives, and the hall is filled with firemen.

    - Those firemen make out like bandits. - Nobody does it normally anymore.

    These young broads don't know what the fuck they want.

    - You think she was a pro? - A pro, Dan?

    A pro is how you think of yourself Last Night. See my point?

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    5 hours ago, CHIEF said:

    Both of my searches in Illinois, they didn't even ask for consent. They had a K9 there in about 10 minutes and ran him around the vehicle with me sitting in it. They opened the back door and ran him through. It was pretty unnerving. It's apparent that rental cars are what's used to move drugs through the Midwest. No telling how many people have been arrested not knowing the history of the vehicle. I would have complied if they would have just asked, but that would probably have given me a chance at plausible deniability. I mean, I consented to a search didn't I?

     

    CHIEF

    I think “rental cars are what’s used to run drugs through the country” is even more accurate. I had a friend rent an SUV in Montgomery, AL while attending a funeral and he noted that it smelled funny. He had the po po come check it out when they reached the place where he was staying, and they found significant evidence of drug paraphernalia, residue or what have you once they started their search. 

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    5 minutes ago, dcar00 said:

    eh, partying in New Orleans is pretty fun.  haven't been in a few years though.

    Agreed, but take away the partying bit, and it’s just another s**thole. 

    Edited by Bobby_Batronic
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    1 hour ago, Bobby_Batronic said:

    I think “rental cars are what’s used to run drugs through the country” is even more accurate. I had a friend rent an SUV in Montgomery, AL while attending a funeral and he noted that it smelled funny. He had the po po come check it out when they reached the place where he was staying, and they found significant evidence of drug paraphernalia, residue or what have you once they started their search. 

    Yeah, it really seems strange though. I thought the idea was to not draw attention to yourself. LEO is specifically looking for out of state tags and a bone stock rental.

    CHIEF

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    24 minutes ago, CHIEF said:

    Yeah, it really seems strange though. I thought the idea was to not draw attention to yourself. LEO is specifically looking for out of state tags and a bone stock rental.

    CHIEF

    well we are talking criminals here.  maybe if they get caught they don't care if the car is impounded.  who knows.

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    17 minutes ago, Steel Shank said:

    No, dudes like me dig chicks like you. It's nothing more than a man/woman thing. Just ignore me.

    Sir. I never put anyone on ignore. I suss them out and decide whether or not I want to consciously ignore them. Has happened yet.

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    Sorry to hear you had a little interruption on your drive back, but at least it worked out in the end.

    I’m subjected to a lot of crime shows (fuckin ID tv murder porn shit) and if there is one thing I know from all of that, once cops make up their mind on something then  they are all fuckin in until there is no chance in hell. And they get pretty pissed when it doesn’t pan out, so they push harder. 
     

    Fuckin stupid shit from idiots that were picked on in high school and now tryin to flex their authority. 
     

    ugh. 
     

     

    Not all officers are like that, but many are and they ruin the reputations of the good ones. 

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    On 2/26/2021 at 2:04 PM, mycox said:

    Happened to me on the way to South Padre a couple of years ago for speeding. I wasn't sacred though because I'm white. I let them search the car because I didn't want to wait an hour for the dogs to arrive.

    So what colors are sacred?

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    On 2/26/2021 at 11:36 AM, Lobo said:

    ^^^ I'm betting dollars to donuts you were pulling for the cop in this story.  

    What if he was rooting for the dog cop? Is that a cop we can root for? He's a dog, but also a cop. There's just a conundrum right there.

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    Glad you made it out safe Pancho. My stepmom is a cop and I've seen my stepbrothers dropped off at home "to be dealt with" for shit I would have been in jail for. Fuck the police

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    i'm admittedly past my prime, but similarly, as a blond haired/blue eyed female in my younger days...got pulled over 3 different times, twice in Houston and once in Austin...basically for nothing lol. each time it was late, twice there was another girlfriend in the car with me...
    each time, cop basically came up, got my license, and proceeded to just chat/flirt...'how y'all doing? whatcha doing out so late? where you headed? do your parents know where you are?' etc...never even hinted i'd done anything wrong (well once it was something like i 'didn't tap the brakes at a yield sign', uh huh). 'just checking on you, making sure everything was okay, y'all be good, girls, have a nice evening' 
    now, he may have been checking for DUI or MIP potential...but the irony there is, all three times we were either drinking/had booze in the car or had been smoking pot in the car lol. 
    i have always assumed other 'motives'...but not nearly as nefarious/potentially dangerous as what Pancho encountered. you can bet we flirted back, with purpose. 

    How y’all doing? /surly is slipping
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    3 hours ago, Nicole44 said:

    Sir. I never put anyone on ignore. I suss them out and decide whether or not I want to consciously ignore them. Has happened yet.

    Why don't we just shut up and dance. You waltz? I like to waltz.

     

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    I've been pulled over in a rental car in the sticks of Louisiana before by a county sheriff. Here's how my story went. About 10 years ago, driving between NO and Lafayette on a back state hwy, SH 90 in a late model audi rented from SIXT with TX plates. SIXT didn't (maybe doesn't) give you a paper email receipt, they email it. Whatever smart phone I had at the time had totally died just a few hours into the trip so I no longer had any rental paperwork. 

    I was careful to obey the speed limits in backroads LA but one sign alerting me to a reduced speed limit must've been blocked when I passed a large semi, because all of a sudden I round a corner going downhill and out of nowhere there's a 4-way, signal-controlled intersection dead ahead on what was until then a freeway. I had the green light but since I was so startled to all of a sudden be going through a large intersection, I kept my eyes on the signal and the cross traffic. I think this was in Houma, LA. Made it through the intersection but all of a sudden I see behind me that a cop's lit me up so I pull over. He asked for my license, proof of insurance and registration. Gave him my license and had to explain I didn't have any registration or proof of insurance because the car's a rental and SIXT emails the paperwork and my cell phone had died a couple days earlier. He asks who I rented the car from and I say SIXT. Well, do you think the vehicle is registered under the name SIXT? Nope. The rental location has a separate business name and that name is what's listed in the DMV database. Technically I don't even know who I rented the car from and I have zero paperwork other than my DL. Cop tells me he clocked my 10 mph over the speed limit. I sheepishly ask if he can let me off with a warning. He says no and writes up the ticket and tells me to drive safely. White dude gets back in his Audi; next stop, Abeville for some great food. 

    tldr; white dude pulled over for speeding in a rental in the LA hinterlands, has no paperwork for the rental or proof of insurance, gets no questions about drugs, luggage, money,  where he was coming from or headed to, and of course no request for a search. The whole thing took about 10 minutes. Paid the fine a few weeks later when I received the invoice by mail.

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    Oh for fucks sake. It might have been a racist incident. It also might have been a lynching.

    But I’m laughing at you white guys saying it would never happen to you. Tons of people are pulled over on the highways every day. I’m extremely white and I had my car searched for 2 fucking hours coming back from south padre not long ago. Dog alerted at the Sarita checkpoint. I had a fucking brisket in the trunk. Cops are generally assholes. And sometimes racist assholes. News at 11.

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    I've been pulled over at least 20 times in my life.  Only once was I ever asked to even get out of the vehicle, and that was because he suspected drunk driving.  I had pulled out of a sports bar around sunset and didn't realize my lights were off until I passed the cop.  Then there go the red and blues...

    I get out and couldn't stop laughing, so then he thinks I might be high.  He asks me why i think he pulled me over and I told him because of the delay in turning on my lights and the business from whence we had just departed.  My cousin( male) was in the car with me. We were stone cold sober and had only had our meals and cokes/ tea. Cop looks at him, looks at me and reminds us to be careful and sends us on our way.

    I had cops act assholish to me.  One in particular pulled me over for passing him in a 55 as he was going about 53.  Complete set up, but fuck him.  At no time have I ever doubted my safety.  At no time have I ever wondered if I was in danger.  Every citizen should be able to have that assurance that they won't be hassled/ assaulted if they are respectful and comply.  Bottom line is that this is far from the case.

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    I was driving a '80 Freightliner for a shady af outfit and got an overnight load from Conyers, Ga to Longview, Tx. I was somewhere in Western Mississippi when I passed a County cop. He fell in behind me for 5 miles or so, then ran alongside me for a mile or so before falling back and pulling me over. I was driving a cabover and you have to climb down a ladder to get on the ground. I'm about 1/2 way down with my paperwork in my teeth when I hear "FREEZE MOTHERFUCKER!!!" I look and see Barney Fucking Fife pointing his .38 at me and he's the shakiest gun in the South. I can't talk because my mouth is full of paperwork but I immediately comply and he takes it out of my teeth.

    Long story short, somebody stole an identical truck in Atlanta the same time we left Atlanta. After we clear that up, I'm trying to make up some of that lost time and talking to another driver on the radio explaining what has happened when I notice I just ran the Louisiana scales... It was not a dull night.

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    15 minutes ago, RPM said:

    I was driving a '80 Freightliner for a shady af outfit and got an overnight load from Conyers, Ga to Longview, Tx. I was somewhere in Western Mississippi when I passed a County cop. He fell in behind me for 5 miles or so, then ran alongside me for a mile or so before falling back and pulling me over. I was driving a cabover and you have to climb down a ladder to get on the ground. I'm about 1/2 way down with my paperwork in my teeth when I hear "FREEZE MOTHERFUCKER!!!" I look and see Barney Fucking Fife pointing his .38 at me and he's the shakiest gun in the South. I can't talk because my mouth is full of paperwork but I immediately comply and he takes it out of my teeth.

    Long story short, somebody stole an identical truck in Atlanta the same time we left Atlanta. After we clear that up, I'm trying to make up some of that lost time and talking to another driver on the radio explaining what has happened when I notice I just ran the Louisiana scales... It was not a dull night.

    Just get on the CB and find you a convoy that will let you slip into the rockin' chair. They would never find you there.

    CHIEF

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    34 minutes ago, RPM said:

    I was driving a '80 Freightliner for a shady af outfit and got an overnight load from Conyers, Ga to Longview, Tx. I was somewhere in Western Mississippi when I passed a County cop. He fell in behind me for 5 miles or so, then ran alongside me for a mile or so before falling back and pulling me over. I was driving a cabover and you have to climb down a ladder to get on the ground. I'm about 1/2 way down with my paperwork in my teeth when I hear "FREEZE MOTHERFUCKER!!!" I look and see Barney Fucking Fife pointing his .38 at me and he's the shakiest gun in the South. I can't talk because my mouth is full of paperwork but I immediately comply and he takes it out of my teeth.

    Long story short, somebody stole an identical truck in Atlanta the same time we left Atlanta. After we clear that up, I'm trying to make up some of that lost time and talking to another driver on the radio explaining what has happened when I notice I just ran the Louisiana scales... It was not a dull night.


    Got dammit. Did the load of manure get to Longview or not, Cletus?

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    3 hours ago, justhookit said:

    Oh for fucks sake. It might have been a racist incident. It also might have been a lynching.

    But I’m laughing at you white guys saying it would never happen to you. Tons of people are pulled over on the highways every day. I’m extremely white and I had my car searched for 2 fucking hours coming back from south padre not long ago. Dog alerted at the Sarita checkpoint. I had a fucking brisket in the trunk. Cops are generally assholes. And sometimes racist assholes. News at 11.

    You had the drugs shoved up your ass, didn't you? 

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    3 hours ago, justhookit said:

    Dog alerted at the Sarita checkpoint.

    That's part of the problem. The dog alerting could be real and it could be total inadvertent bullshit if the dog isn't properly trained. Or the cop may do something sneaky on purpose that causes the dog to alert. 

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    On 2/27/2021 at 11:21 AM, Nicole44 said:

    For a blonde, blue eyed white chick have had two unforgettable experiences with a cop. One I share. One I wouldn’t ever share. 

    Driving back to my apartment complex in Houston with a friend after seeing two movies. Double feature. 

    Cop pulls up behind me. All sirens and speakers. “Pull over. Stop your car. Turn off your ignition and hold your keys out of your car!”

    I pull over and am now surrounded by five cop cars. Do as cop says. Storm trooper stomps up to the car gun drawn on me and my friend. “I will plug you if you move.” Which freaks me out even more because now he demands my DL/registration. 

    My friend Jessica is like “holy shit did we not buy tickets to a double feature? Wtf?”  She thinks someHow this has something to do with the movie theater. 

    Storm trooper again grunts out for my DL and info. I ask if I can get my purse from the back seat and registration from glove compartment. He gets within two inches from my face and says, “do it fast bitch.” I Comply. Guns still onon me and friend. Freaking out.

    While one cop has a gun pointed at my head, storm trooper snatches both items out of my hand.

    Stomps back to his vehicle while two cops have guns on me and my friend. Twenty minutes goes by. Hands in the air. Both of us. Still. Finally cop comes back and says something like “ran your license plate. Got something wrong. One letter/number off.”

    That’s it.  No apologies. it takes ten more minutes before we can drive away. Wtf?

    this story is not at all to diminish Pancho’s story. I do get that they profile.  Which sucks. Wrong on every level. They also get behind your car and run plates out of boredom. No idea what the fuck plate they thought that was. 

     And now for comparison sake, the second story—the one less shared. Figure it’s gotta be a doozy and since we’re all fake faces and aliases, 

    seth meyers Let's Go GIF by Late Night with Seth Meyers

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    similar to nicole44 story.  a buddy of mine bought a used explorer with heavily tinted windows.  was driving down 183, its dark, headed to a fedex office to drop off a package. he pulls into the parking lot and out of nowhere there are 4 cop cars with lights and sirens. 

    Cop gets out and has gun out.  does the open the window, show your hands, drop the keys, etc thing.  he gets out and the have him up against the car.   start asking him questions.  he says I'm coming from my house to deliver a package at fedex.  there is about 10-15 minutes of checking DL, insurance, main cop in car talking to someone.

    after all that, cop says you can go.  friend asks what is going on and cop mumbled something about them looking for a similar vehicle for some reason.

    my guess is they fucked up the plate number.  he thinks it was because of the blacked out window.

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    I’ve got several cop stories, one in Dallas where one flat out lied. But I’m going to spare it because like others stated, I was just wondering how this was going to be an inconvenience but never did I ever think I could die. And that’s privilege. 

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    If a cop fucks up a plate number the inquiry would almost certainly come back to the wrong make, model and color of vehicle and merit a double check. "Fucked up the plate number" is almost certainly a lie. But if true, it's lazy and derelict. 

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    On 2/26/2021 at 5:49 PM, atomheartbevo said:

    Did your beer "disappear" during the search?  Because that happened to me multiple times in the late 80s and early 90s.

    Had that happen to me in Colorado.  Had 4 cases of Shiner in the bed of the truck.  Fucker took one and made me pour 1 full case out on the side of the highway.  

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    14 minutes ago, Chopper said:

    If a cop fucks up a plate number the inquiry would almost certainly come back to the wrong make, model and color of vehicle and merit a double check. "Fucked up the plate number" is almost certainly a lie. But if true, it's lazy and derelict. 

    yep.  it has to have the make model color.

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    On 2/27/2021 at 3:03 PM, mchookem said:

    i'm admittedly past my prime, but similarly, as a blond haired/blue eyed female in my younger days...got pulled over 3 different times, twice in Houston and once in Austin...basically for nothing lol. each time it was late, twice there was another girlfriend in the car with me...

    each time, cop basically came up, got my license, and proceeded to just chat/flirt...'how y'all doing? whatcha doing out so late? where you headed? do your parents know where you are?' etc...never even hinted i'd done anything wrong (well once it was something like i 'didn't tap the brakes at a yield sign', uh huh). 'just checking on you, making sure everything was okay, y'all be good, girls, have a nice evening' 🙄

    now, he may have been checking for DUI or MIP potential...but the irony there is, all three times we were either drinking/had booze in the car or had been smoking pot in the car lol. 

    i have always assumed other 'motives'...but not nearly as nefarious/potentially dangerous as what Pancho encountered. you can bet we flirted back, with purpose. 

    I grew up in a small town with only 1 high school.  This one cop, maybe 2 years out of HS, kept pulling over this one HS girl (a Jr at the time) until she finally agreed to go out with him.  I had gone out on 1-2 dates with her earlier in the year (we were both in HS) and right after they start 'dating' the cop starts pulling me over.  Luckily it only really lasted a month or so and i was never cuffed and stuffed.  I think girl and her stalker eventually got married, so there's that.

    OP, sucks that happened and you had to go through all the bullshit for 'reasons'.  

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    51 minutes ago, Trey3216 said:

    Had that happen to me in Colorado.  Had 4 cases of Shiner in the bed of the truck.  Fucker took one and made me pour 1 full case out on the side of the highway.  

    He did you a favor. Shiner to Colorado?  you aggy? 

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    2 hours ago, washparkhorn said:

    He did you a favor. Shiner to Colorado?  you aggy? 

    Was bringing some to a buddy up there, an some for personal consumption over the week.  I was also 23 and had never been to Colorado.  

    Edited by Trey3216
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    Just now, Trey3216 said:

    Was bringing some to a buddy up there, an some for personal consumption over the week.  

    Cool. I like a sweet beer with sushi or Mexican food every once in a while.  

    _____________________________________

    @Pancho handled the situation very well.

    I am deferential to LEO in those situations. Some of them are nervous. Some of them are bullies. Far easier to give them the respect they expect in those situations than put yourself in their crosshairs. Much safer for the person at risk of LEO abuse.  

    Rental cars sound like a bad idea in the south. In Colorado, goodness knows how much pot is left in rentals cars as the pot tourists drop them off at DIA. 

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    6 hours ago, Chopper said:

    If a cop fucks up a plate number the inquiry would almost certainly come back to the wrong make, model and color of vehicle and merit a double check. "Fucked up the plate number" is almost certainly a lie. But if true, it's lazy and derelict. 

    You can bet their first conclusion is "stolen plates", not a mistaken plate number. Stolen plates probably means the guys riding in the stolen car are dangerous. Hence, the overreaction. Remember, the cops are infallible in their minds, and everything is a worst case scenario.

    CHIEF

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    I got pulled over by a narcotics officer in Lafayette, LA last night as I was driving back to Houston from reffing a basketball game.  The officer (insert bro name here) said I drove on the middle lane lines at least 3ft on both my left and right and that's why he pulled me over.  Now, I can legit believe this because I was definitely on my phone trying to pull up at podcast at that point and was halfway paying attention. 


    Alternate take: put the fucking phone down and watch the road instead of finding a podcast Pancho.

    Yeah, that was some bullshit. But I can see how you looked like a black Belgian cocaine transporter trying to make up profits after the Antwerp bust.

    You should ID the officer and bang his wife.
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    Alternate take: put the fucking phone down and watch the road instead of finding a podcast Pancho.

    Yeah, that was some bullshit. But I can see how you looked like a black Belgian cocaine transporter trying to make up profits after the Antwerp bust.

    You should ID the officer and bang his wife.

    We’re talking about a cop’s wife....she’s already banging several other dudes. Including the cop’s partner and supervisor.
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    On 3/1/2021 at 12:07 PM, gyroprotagonist said:

    I grew up in a small town with only 1 high school.  This one cop, maybe 2 years out of HS, kept pulling over this one HS girl (a Jr at the time) until she finally agreed to go out with him.  I had gone out on 1-2 dates with her earlier in the year (we were both in HS) and right after they start 'dating' the cop starts pulling me over.  Luckily it only really lasted a month or so and i was never cuffed and stuffed.  I think girl and her stalker eventually got married, so there's that.

    OP, sucks that happened and you had to go through all the bullshit for 'reasons'.  

    She picked him over you?

    You must be really ugly, broke, fat and bald.  
     

    Welcome to the club. 

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    On 2/28/2021 at 12:33 PM, justhookit said:

    Oh for fucks sake. It might have been a racist incident. It also might have been a lynching.

    But I’m laughing at you white guys saying it would never happen to you. Tons of people are pulled over on the highways every day. I’m extremely white and I had my car searched for 2 fucking hours coming back from south padre not long ago. Dog alerted at the Sarita checkpoint. I had a fucking brisket in the trunk. Cops are generally assholes. And sometimes racist assholes. News at 11.

    Did they impound your brisket?

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    One guys racist rant.   So I was, I think about 10 years old or so.  This would have been around 1975, I guess.  I went to school with a bunch of black kids, the only other school in town was St Mary’s catholic school, although my family was catholic my dad was a schoolteacher so I went to public school.   Anyway one of my classmates was a kid named Kenny Johnson.  Half of his face was a scar, because we burned trash in barrels and a hairspray can or something had exploded and burned him. The town I grew up in was divided, blacks were on one side of the canal, whites on the other.  Kind of like I-35 in Austin in the old days.

    Anyway one day I went with Kenny to his house to play football.   We had a good time.  I went inside.  There were bunk beds in there to the ceiling where he and his brothers slept.  Cramped as fuck.   His mother brought me a drink of water, in a tin cup, that looked like it had been shared between everyone, because it had.  That was all cool.  I had a good time.

    The next day, when I was walking home from school, i got the dreaded shit.  “Hey nigger lover, I heard you spent some time in shantytown “.   A belt got pulled out.  I got hit in the head with a basketball, whipped with a belt, and kicked with some shitheeled boot.  

    I went on home crying, got over it, and I won’t repeat what my old man said to me about those boys.   He drove a school bus during integration and didn’t brook any bullshit.  I wish sometimes I had his patience.  

     

     

     

    • Hook 'Em 1
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    One guys racist rant.   So I was, I think about 10 years old or so.  This would have been around 1975, I guess.  I went to school with a bunch of black kids, the only other school in town was St Mary’s catholic school, although my family was catholic my dad was a schoolteacher so I went to public school.   Anyway one of my classmates was a kid named Kenny Johnson.  Half of his face was a scar, because we burned trash in barrels and a hairspray can or something had exploded and burned him. The town I grew up in was divided, blacks were on one side of the canal, whites on the other.  Kind of like I-35 in Austin in the old days.
    Anyway one day I went with Kenny to his house to play football.   We had a good time.  I went inside.  There were bunk beds in there to the ceiling where he and his brothers slept.  Cramped as fuck.   His mother brought me a drink of water, in a tin cup, that looked like it had been shared between everyone, because it had.  That was all cool.  I had a good time.
    The next day, when I was walking home from school, i got the dreaded shit.  “Hey nigger lover, I heard you spent some time in shantytown “.   A belt got pulled out.  I got hit in the head with a basketball, whipped with a belt, and kicked with some shitheeled boot.  
    I went on home crying, got over it, and I won’t repeat what my old man said to me about those boys.   He drove a school bus during integration and didn’t brook any bullshit.  I wish sometimes I had his patience.  
     
     
     

    Some fights are worth fighting.

    They always have been.

    Ernie Koy tried to take on the entire aggy fan base to stand up for my great uncle (a dirty messican who the ags slung all manner of bullshit at) 90 years ago. To this day, no Koy will ever pay for a drink in the presence of any member of my family.

    While there were a lotta shitheels in your neck of the woods back then, there were some real bygod Americans, too. Thanks for being one of em.
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    22 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:


    Some fights are worth fighting.

    They always have been.

    Ernie Koy tried to take on the entire aggy fan base to stand up for my great uncle (a dirty messican who the ags slung all manner of bullshit at) 90 years ago. To this day, no Koy will ever pay for a drink in the presence of any member of my family.

    While there were a lotta shitheels in your neck of the woods back then, there were some real bygod Americans, too. Thanks for being one of em.

    I wish I was making that up.  I actually got beat up, as a kid, for playing with a black classmate and going to his house.  

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