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Al Bundy's Napoleon Hand

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Everything posted by Al Bundy's Napoleon Hand

  1. "The one-time cop is one of those rare liberals in rural Middle Tennessee..." https://www.newschannel5.com/news/newschannel-5-investigates/tennessee-sheriff-defends-jailing-liberal-activist-for-posting-trump-meme-about-school-shooting This isn't to disparage the motivations of Bushart, but only to illustrate social dynamics (I was going to say "small town" dynamics, but it's far from exclusive) of the "why don't good cops do something?" CSB Time cliff notes, 100 percent guaranteed to not be accurate on details, as it's my brain recollecting- I used to work for a trucking company that subcontracted with Union Pacific, hauling off rail, ties, and old track material being replaced for maintenence. It was not uncommon for the locals to snatch recyclable stockpiles cuz we can only do so much so fast (and really niche, so figured company's getting paid) and hey! Free Shit for peeps who grew up on Dukes of Hazard. Anyways, my boss comes across one of stockpiles in East Texas that he was about to load on a truck and it's getting pilfered. "Hey! That's not yours!" (direct quote, probably) Dude drives off. Boss: Whatever Sheriff car pulls up- " Hey! Was that guy stealing your shit?" Boss: "Yeah, but it's no big deal" Sheriff: "AW HELL NAW! He ain't getting away with that shit!!!" *short flash forward* The Sheriff, the thief, the judge (who all probably knew each other from high school) and my boss are in a courtroom with the judge asking my boss how he wants to handle this on the dl. Boss: I dunno, I'm kinda scared and just wanna get outta here. Somehow a deal was worked out that involved my boss getting some hunting dogs from the thief. *flash forward years later when my boss came back to the site for some more track maintenence* *Sheriff car pulls up, window rolls down* Thief: Guess who's the the new sheriff now? The Point- While Bushart is in the right, he probably fucked Weems' girlfriend in high school too. Team Bushart
  2. I get along best with workers at the dairies. Just friendly waves, smiles, and head nods and virtually zero chance I'm going to hear any moronic shit come flying outta their mouths that I can comprehend.
  3. Save those big, bad, funky whales...
  4. The insurrection was televised. The instigator pardoned the Camp Aushwitz foot soldiers. Sociopaths will try to convince you that you're crazy. They're going to lose.
  5. To be clear (or probably not), I have the vaguest of ideas of if even I agree with your takes. It was just more a 7th grade feeling of watching Galaga High Score Champion going all
  6. I'm just impressed that anyone can multi-quote in a post-game thread.
  7. Bad News Bears. But it wasn't the team, just the coach's son. And "have to this" was throw the game. And it didn't work anyway cuz they won the game. But other than all that, it was surreal.
  8. Pumpkin Spice!
  9. Please Lord, let me get back to work promoting fascists' cuts to cancer research.
  10. DM Ingrassia and ask him how you get into the White People Club, Quick Draw.
  11. Throwing candy out to the crowd Dragging down the main The helpless little thing with the dirty mouth Who's always got something to say You're sitting around at home now waiting for your brother to call I saw him down in the alley Having had enough of it all Said you can do what you want to whenever you want to You can do what you want to there's no one to stop you All spit and spite you're up all night and down every day A tired man with only hours to go just waiting to be taken away Getting into the back of a car for candy from some stranger Watching the parade with pinpoint eyes full of smoldering anger You can do what you want to whenever you want to You can do what you want to there's no one to stop you Now you can do what you want to whenever you want to Do what you want to whenever you want to Do what you want to whenever you want to Though it doesn't mean a thing Big nothing https://youtu.be/iU9yMN1MCfY?si=p9t0Cc_lORRRv2z6
  12. More musically incorrect and better
  13. I was never a huge White Stripes fan but this caught me at the right time, jacked up on coffee at a truck stop urinal. JFC, that is a hooky Page-worthy riff blown thru an octaver ascending while the vocal line descends to meet it at that final *omph* note. Goddamn right I'll bang my head at a pisser.
  14. Subtitle: "Oh, And Another Thing About Gene and Paul..."
  15. Admist Trump lavishing the claimed net benefit to society of immigrant raids selectively on Dem cities in Dem states, Abbott can't find any immigrants admist downtown Austin's construction sites, so the homeless are a good substitute. https://www.statesman.com/news/politics/article/greg-abbott-homeless-austin-21111887.php
  16. "They were just joking!" This is something someone who doesn't understand the difference between "jokes" and "things fascists find funny" would say. Jokes have punchlines which are funny in part because they're clever endings that the listener did not expect. Things fascists find funny is the exact moronic malevolent shit that a listener would expect from fascists.
  17. How many grandchildren does Kid Rock have?
  18. Police tried to question him, but he just kept hanging up. https://www.startribune.com/minneapolis-police-say-umbrella-man-was-a-white-supremacist-trying-to-incite-george-floyd-rioting/571932272
  19. tldw: Cracks up audience of ICE officers while in detention, gets his joints back which he smokes outside with a frog and unicorn after being released
  20. When right-wing agitators initiate violence, they know they'll have a pardon waiting for them.
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