Jump to content

Hmbre97

Legacy Members
  • Posts

    2377
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Everything posted by Hmbre97

  1. Hmbre97

    Shit My Kid Says

    My 5 yr old after punching on his brother and being an asshole Me: Son, you keep acting like this and Santa ain't bringing you nothing but coal for Christmas Him: Well, we like to grill a lot so I wouldn't mind getting coal. Me:
  2. Wow..... where do you get your weed?
  3. I don't give a shit but I'm also not a racist shitbag. To say that there is no one that cares is naive.
  4. Based on the past few pages of this thread, kegels.
  5. Not HEB related but I had to go to Summit Racing up in Arlington a few weeks ago and to my surprise, there was a Panchos Buffet close by. I hadn't eaten at Panchos in probably 20 years and it was like stepping into a time machine. The food was exactly as I remember it and brought back a lot of fun memories of going there as a kid. Those sopapillas just hit different.
  6. Hmbre97

    Shit My Kid Says

    10 yr old walking to laundry room holding a pair of underwear Me: whatcha got there bud? Him: my underwear... Me: having some issues? Him: I had a foop accident but just a tiny bit Me: foop? Him: I farted but then some poop came out too. I call it fooping. Me: alright, fair enough. Happens to the best of us.
  7. Gives new meaning to blowing her back out
  8. Any word if he threw any passes from shore while Stewart or Randle rode by on a boat?
  9. Hmbre97

    Shit My Kid Says

    Talking to my 10yo on the phone one night that him and his 5yo brother were with their mom. Me: What's your brother doing right now? 10yo: He's watching Puss in Boots :starts giggling: Me: What's funny about that? (even though I know him and his friends are starting to experiment with dirty jokes so I have a feeling where this is going) 10yo: I dunno, Puss in Boots. more like Puss on my face :more giggling: Me: 10yo: :more giggling: No wait, he's watching Puss on my weiner :starts laughing: Me: Hold up son, I let some stuff slide but you're not old enough to be saying stuff like that. Who's telling you these jokes? 10yo: I didn't say anything bad. I said it with a U and not an I Me: Wait, you think it's funny if it's piss instead of puss? 10yo: Yeah, I guess. My fortnite friend said it and I think that's what he meant. Me: We're gonna have to have a chat in a couple of years but for now, don't let your mom hear any of your jokes....
  10. Can't forget this heartfelt classic
  11. Aggy is hyped up and Bama has their head up their ass. Both will regress to their mean.
  12. Calm your tits. There is a lot of game left to play and it's a 10 point game...
  13. https://www.streameast.live/cfb/alabama-texas-a-m/
  14. Wanna see a dead body? https://www.streameast.live/cfb/alabama-texas-a-m/
  15. Kyler Murray working at Bama now?
  16. Not a fan of that clock mgmt but I'll take up 18 at half every day and twice on Saturday
×
×
  • Create New...