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TexArcher

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by TexArcher

  1. Arch has to get a drive. I like Quinn, but change it up. Fuck feelings. This is for a championship.
  2. The fick are you doing stepping up into that, Quinn? Twice?
  3. Y'all see that guy in the Bayern Munich shirt because it was the only red shirt he owns doing the Horns down? Haha, fuck that bandwagon nerd.
  4. PK will make some adjustments. Keep moving the ball and give the D a rest. Go get some points. We're fine.
  5. Need to get some pressure. They're getting open.
  6. Don't love the 3rd down play call, but anybody thinking we punt there ever hasn't watched much Texas football the last 4 years. And we get most of them.
  7. Don't worry about the hold, I'll just one hand it!
  8. Me neither. For the record, I have been back to a couple of games with my dad since, and the fan behavior is somewhat improved, because there are SWAT cops with long rifles and riot shields about every 30 yards. It's the only stadium I've been to that has armored personnel carriers parked around it as a show of force. I'm serious. I hope we break those lunatics' hearts tonight.
  9. I was there. Backstory: my dad taught at Ohio State for 30 years. He went to Texas. I grew up rooting for both (Texas first, because I was raised here, and tOSU against anybody else). What I saw from those mouth-breathing heathen in 2005 after Limas Sweed broke their hearts made it impossible for me to root for Ohio State ever again. If you weren't there, I promise you: whatever you've heard, whatever you imagine reading this, it was worse. That stadium is a madhouse to get out of, shoulder-to-shoulder mosh pit. I caught about two dozen cheap elbows to my ribs, shoulder checks, and so on. All I heard was "Fuck you, Tex!" and "Go home, you Texas faggot!" If you're thinking, "I woulda knocked somebody out," no, you wouldn't have. It was very clear that you'd have been stomped into the hospital by 30 people if you did. They wanted you to, so they could. When we finally made it out of that sewer, I took off my 10 jersey and stuffed it into one pocket of my shorts and my Longhorn hat into the other one, as my only backup was a 60-year-old man and I knew those psychos were only going to get worse as we got away from the stadium and all the cops. I walked back shirtless across at least a mile of that shitty place, watching people throw Molotov cocktails into dumpsters and light couches on fire in the street. It looked like Beirut or something. When we got back to the truck, I told my dad I'd be fucking embarrassed if anything like that ever happened in Austin. He nodded sadly (remember he invested 30 years of his life into that place) and said, "Yeah, it happened after the Michigan game last year, too." I said, "Wait, y'all beat Michigan last year." He looked over at me and said, "Oh, yeah. It doesn't matter who wins the game. They do this after every big game either way now." In conclusion... Fuck Ohio State in their faces. I hope we win by 70 and everybody transfers out of that shithole. Were you there, too? Tell your story. Let's get worked up...
  10. GOOD MORNING, YOU MAGNIFICENT BASTARDS. Let's win.
  11. Ah, yes, Jesus likes us better. I hope we get to curbstomp these guys.
  12. Is that 6 guys failing to block 3? Good lord.
  13. I mean, that was pretty egregious, tho.
  14. They blanketed 44 there, finally.
  15. Okay, this game doesn't suck.
  16. He'd probably rather you didn't....
  17. We're gonna get dragged again for starting bottle throwing, watch.
  18. Is there an argument to be made that the ball's uncatchable if it's 5 yards underthrown and being picked off?
  19. How many holds have there been in this entire playoff? I've watched every game and I can't imagine it's more than maybe two.
  20. Penn State is Sanduskied if 44 is done.
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