ulukinatme

My dad was an ol' country boy, used to hit us with stuff from this thread all the time. I haven't heard a lot of people use this one, but anytime I'd say "Hey" to him he'd always respond: "Straw is cheaper, grass is free, buy a farm you'll have all three." Also, if I ever asked him to repeat himself, he'd respond with the ol' "I don't chew my cabbage twice." One of the more popular ones: "If a frog had wings it wouldn't bump it's ass when it hopped." MIL used to always use "Tough titty, said the kitty."

I liked the Neil Diamond treatment: This was also in the replies:

Eh, that's her worst picture. No makeup and dopey bangs for a professional pic in her robes. Opportunity to fuck a rude judge who will bring another woman into the bed chamber? I'll take it.

Be careful the next time you tell someone to suck your balls.

The LFL isn't good football, and I'm okay with that.

Don't even care if that's really her or not. Well done.

This is where I'm at. Twice so far this weekend, but she was horny after New Years last year too.

I thought the point of this thread is you don't have your shit together?

After a New Years party at my buddy's place I decided to walk the few miles home rather than sleep off my intoxication. About halfway there the shits hit me. I held it for about a mile, but a half mile from home there was no more holding back. I dropped trow in the woods and left a mess everywhere. Tried to clean my backside with leaves, but in my drunkenness I did a shitty job. Walked the rest of the way home with poopy underpants. Could have been worse.

Oh to be a fly on the wall when people used to ask "So, Mrs. NMAS, what do you do for a living?"

Goddamn beautiful, I can relate. MIL is quite batshit crazy, runs in her family. My wife is one of six girls. All of them were physically, verbally, emotionally abused growing up. It didn't end once they got older. When one of the girls gets upset at the MIL for starting some drama, she'd spread lies and turn the others against her. Eventually it extended outside the the 6 girls, even son-in-laws like myself were fair game for bullshit fabricated stories and baseless attacks on character. That essentially ended sometime this fall. MIL tried to start some bullshit drama aimed at my wife and I, wife fought back, and most of the other sisters finally stood up. It led to 4 of them having Thanksgiving together without the MIL. We all got drunk, played cards, and had an excellent time. Then comes Christmas. In the holiday spirit of things we all got together for an hour with the MIL and the others. MIL acts polite as pie for about an hour, but when the mood starts turning we all retreated back to my house for a separate party that involved more cards, more whiskey, and more fun times. We all decided this was the way. My wife fell out of her chair three times tonight, I laughed my ass off. MIL is ultra conservative Baptist and doesn't allow drinking at all. She would not have approved.

Red Letter Media does some great stuff. I prefer the Plinkett reviews Red Letter Media does when it comes to Star Wars though. They're savage, with plenty of comedy as they completely destroy the prequels and new trilogy:

Anthony Daniels live role? I know some people mistook Denis Lawson (Wedge) for Anthony Daniels, but did Daniels actually have a live role outside of the C3P0 attire? I hadn't heard that till now. Where was the Outrider? Saw the Ghost, but couldn't spot Dash's ship. Shadows of the Empire was a great game, it would be nice if it's considered canon again.

I agree, Kylo should have been stable from the start, then if they still do the redemption angle it would have been a surprise or they could have just left him evil all the way. Instead they dangle it from day 1 and the payoff falls a bit short at the end. I suppose the Snoke they killed in Last Jedi could have just been a clone, but even then Johnson spent much of Last Jedi telling other stories and gave Snoke little screen time. There was no explanation of his back story, he has one scene I think prior to the showdown with Rey, he almost became a background figure as Johnson focused more on Kylo. Disney made so many mistakes with this trilogy, failing to put together a cohesive plan and consistent story line doomed them from the start. They should have stuck to one script broken up for three movies, one director, one vision. Three visions was never going to work.

What the hell is wrong with Switzer's finger? Did he break it checking the oil in one of his Tight Ends?

Palpatine was an unfortunate, but necessary addition to the movie. When Johnson killed off Snoke prematurely it left a power gap for antagonists going into the final film of the trilogy. Who was left? Hux and Kylo. Hux was never going to be the final confrontation, he was too goofy. It's possible Kylo could have filled the role, but they've been teasing his redemption since day 1. With no ultimate antagonist driving the plot, there would be nothing for Rey to overcome. You can't really introduce a new bad guy and try to build him up in the final film. You can't introduce Voldemort in Deathly Hollows 2, Sauron wasn't conceived in the Lord of the Rings Part 3. It stood to reason that Abrams needed an established bad guy for the established heroes to face. Palpatine unfortunately made the most sense given his powers with the dark side and the way he previously alluded to the Sith being able to cheat death. It should have been Snoke all along and Johnson should have used the 2nd film to build on that character, but he killed him off in a boneheaded move.

From Wookiepedia: "Around 4000 BBY, lightsaber crystals were used to indicate a Jedi's chosen class. Blue indicated a Jedi Guardian, a Jedi who used the Force on a more physical level. Green indicated a Jedi Consular, a Jedi who preferred to reflect on the mysteries of the Force and fight the dark side at its heart. Yellow indicated a Jedi Sentinel, a Jedi who honed his or her skills in a balance of combat and scholarly pursuits." So blue = good with lightsaber, green = strong in the force, yellow = Sentinels balanced in both. Somebody already touched on it, but the real significance is Rey made her own lightsaber which is supposed to signify her training is complete.

I've seen people complain about the Force. They didn't like the Leia Mary Poppins act in Last Jedi, didn't like Force Healing in this movie, whatever. Every movie they introduce a new Force power, this is nothing new. New Hope gave us Force Choke, Telepathy, Force Persuade. Empire Strikes Back gave us Telekinesis. Return of the Jedi had Force Lightning and Force Jump. Phantom Menace had Force Run, etc etc. Force Healing has been around in video games and the books, if the book fags can be trusted, for some time. As far as the Leia Poppins act, people can use the Force to move objects and people, it wouldn't be a stretch to move oneself in zero gravity (Although I don't think we've seen Jedi survive in an oxygen-less environment yet, even in Phantom Menace they had to use rebreathers to go underwater). I think Leia Poppins caught a lot of people off guard simply because we hadn't seen Leia actually use the Force up to that point.

Here's the whole video, they get some chicks too and an Asian guy spazes out.

Yeah, they at least listened to the fans and retconned or dialed back a lot of bullshit that set people off in Last Jedi. They cut out the politics instead of pushing the feminism down our throats. Rose took a major back seat, she had no meaningful part in the movie whatsoever and they squashed the romance. They went from Rian Johnson saying "Rey's parents are nobodies" to "Oh, Rey's a Palpatine!" Luke's character was much improved from what they did with him in Last Jedi. They even made a reference to the "Holdo Manuever" and poked fun at that. The Sith ARE an actual race though, or at least they once were. There's often confusion because there was an actual Sith race, and then we have the practitioners of the dark side that we also refer to as the Sith. It's stupid, it's basically the same word for two different things (Although at one time I think there were many dark side practicing Sith and the rule of two was something they created later). They did a call back to Revenge of the Sith. I think Kylo asks "I thought you died?" Palpatine responds with "The dark side of the force is a pathway that leads to many abilities some consider to be....unnatural." I think we're supposed to glean that Palpatine used the force to save himself somehow. It's a little hard to believe, but then again Maul survived getting cut in half in Phantom Menace and falling too. I've thought about this bit some. Palpatine became a necessary evil for Rise of Skywalker (pun intended). When Johnson fucked up the Snoke character by killing him off early, it left a power vacuum for antagonists going into the last film. We had two established bad guys: General Hux and Kylo. We find out that Hux was a spy of sorts, and honestly he would have never made a good primary antagonist for the film because of his weak nature, so he's out. Kylo is out too, because he was set to get his redemption arc which they teased from the very first movie. That left no possible antagonists for a climax with Rey. So, Abrams really only had two options: create a new antagonist out of thin air, or bring back an existing character. It's pretty difficult creating a new supreme bad guy for the final film in a trilogy....there's no history, there's no attachment, you're having to build someone new up against already established characters. You don't introduce Sauron in the final book of the Lord of the Rings. So, Abrams went to the well to bring back Palpatine. Given his powers with the dark side and the bit/reference they made to Revenge of the Sith and Dark Plageus, he made the most sense to return. It gave Abrams an established bad guy, even if it was played out and it cheapened the Vader redemption arc a bit. Disney would just like to say "This holiday season, don't forget to force call your loved ones."

Buddy found a stream and already burned a DVD, saw it this afternoon. A lot of people are pissed about some of the leaks that came out, but I can confirm that not all of them are true. There were a lot of leaks though, and some hit the nail on the head. I can confirm whatever.

"This is real" Joey Ryan is the supposedly the king of "Dong Style." He's also had the move reversed though....Power of the Puss:

Thanks, no need for a cup, I'll just get mine straight from the tap.