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smuggs

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by smuggs

  1. Felt like the reimagined version had less rising but more cock.
  2. Can we make it the 6:30 kick, I still need to run by Costco for some new underwear.
  3. smuggs

    Bert!

    Kids with Art Garfunkel hair, apparently.
  4. smuggs

    Bert!

    Now you've done it.
  5. Emergency water table/aquifer penetration.
  6. All these motherfuckers freaking out at every single routine pass completion like the game was just won in septuple overtime. Tirico does the same shit on SNF. Calm the fuck down and call the game like an adult.
  7. I'm no pilot but it's astonishing to me that ~20 lb. goose can wipe out a ~75 ton aircraft. Although a nail through a car tire @ 80 mph can produce some crazy results so I guess it makes sense.
  8. My thoughts exactly. I'd add that Lily Rose was fantastic. I'd be surprised if she doesn't pick up an Oscar nod in a few weeks.
  9. Going tonight. Pumped.
  10. Mini-split is the answer. It will resolve the frozen pipe issue and condition your garage for year-round drinking. Do not underestimate the awesomeness of a ~70 degree garage in the middle of August.
  11. I enjoyed the Superman Returns trailer with the Brando voice-over. Another example of great trailer/shit film.
  12. My high score on Captagon is 1,272,800. Come at me bro.
  13. Years ago I saw a lady get her nose rearranged by a flying piñata stick at my buddy's kid's birthday party when a little fella swung for the fences and it slipped out of his hands. I've trained my wife and kids to keep their heads on a swivel like they're sitting row 1 down the 3rd base line when that fucking piñata starts bouncing.
  14. I want a t-shirt that says "Revitalize Okinawan Karate."
  15. Must have flown off the track at the #5 turn of Rainbow Road. Or took a Thwomp to the head on Bowser's Castle.
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