Homesickhorn

Whoa there tiger. Save some pussy for us.

All your angina are belong to us.

Fuck me, the comments are nauseating.

Nobody was bankrupted. But people went above and beyond, held THEIR shingle out for someone who didn’t have a pot to piss in, and reaped the whirlwind (from both sides of the equation). The keys to the safe were handed to him. And all a mother fucker had to do, was play by their rules for four months. Hubris is a mother fucker, and so is karma.

Say what you will about the Ole Miss administration not shaking the fuck out of the tree. But I’ve seen them go scorched earth on the racial shit. Not only when I was there, but since I left. This kid is fucked, and rightfully so. I just wish the rest of those fucktards were too.

Richard Gere’s pissed?

And you’re gonna take a changla to the beak, at least once.

I didn’t look like them, or act like them. I was often ostracized by them (the fraternity I pledged) for not adhering to the status quo when it came to clothing. I was a flip flops guy (in the summer/boots in the winter). The Dixie shuffle (some refer to it as Bama bangs, but I know what we called it) haircut, Gray New Balances or Clark’s Wallabies, and front-tucked shirt, wasn’t my cup of tea. I took their ribbings in stride. Now for the humble brag: At parties, either at the fraternity house, or off campus, I’d wear their snide remarks, and brush them off. Those dipshits were constantly vexed by the fact that I constantly went home with the girls they brought to the party. The confused Hail Mary of, “he’s from Texas. That’s why he’s wearing shitkickers and a tee shirt! What the fuck?” Was always answered with a very controlled, but matter of fact, “But he plays baseball”. Nostalgic rant over. I want to call in a fire-for-effect air strike on those fucktards. I knew my alma mater was going to figure out a way to make its way to the front page in a terrible manner. The only thing worse than those pieces of fuck-pie, are the twitter comments supporting them.

Good thing I scrolled. Beat me to it.

Some SAPD dipshit has a new belt being made.

“Hey Paul”!!!

Little Homesick and I are nursing this guy back to health. Found him out behind our warehouse. Looks like one of the feral cats might’ve gotten after him. Super docile, and according to Jr, he “appreciates what we’re doing for him.

It was me. Well, it was me that told the story. It was a friend of mine who did the rhinoplasty. It’s got to be out there somewhere. I’ve recapped it twice already, and I’m at work. Can someone more internet savvy than me do the search?

This reminds me of the Jim Gaffigan bit about Jesus being a shitty carpenter. “I’m really glad that whole son-of-God thing panned out for him. Because he built me a shed last year and that thing was a piece of shit”.

Bring it. You dizzy fucking cunt.

If I had a dime for every French foreign exchange student…..ah, fuck it.

Nice recovery, dude.

This is a text exchange between myself and my Ukrainian “friend”. I sent her the MTG twitter speech. This girl’s brother, who is my age, is and has been fighting with the Uk Special Forces. I’m just gonna leave this snippet of our chat.

Not to derail. But rules…we has them.

The last two videos need to be in the Holy Shit thread.

Can’t edit for some reason. But I think about four of y’all beat me to the punch.

Username doth not checkout.