GoPokes83

FIFY

Thank God it’s over and good luck going forward. The last MRI I had in Bastrop I was in the tube and heard a freaking dial up modem. Just how old is this machine and just what’s being blasted through me?

Probably don’t want to be a woman going back to Somalia not doing what you’ve been told. If I were her I’d just try and take over a cargo ship on the ride home and go back a hero.

Fucking perfect.

I haven’t read all this, but then stop fucking moving here!

Growing up we had about 2 acres of front yard, no riding mower or finish mower for the tractor. The old man had 4 sons and a 21 inch push mower. Preteen days and I’d be out there pushing for awhile and here would come my dad telling me, “Let me spell you for a minute” and then he’d mow the rest of the section I was working on. Part of me had my feelings hurt as I was doing the best I could and wanted to please my dad, but most of me was more than happy to go back into the house and listen to some BTO or 3 Dog Night. Fast forward to last night! My 11 year old was going on a 3 day trip to the water park with her pal and wanted Mom’s car cleaned up for the trip. So we’re out there washing it and listening to some music and she’s just not doing it the right way, which of course is how I’d do it. I started to say something and I sweatergod “Let me spell you” came into my head! I bit my damn tongue right quick! I had to remind myself to live in the damn moment, she’s not on her freaking phone and actually wants to spend time with her old ass dad for a change! Who gives a shit if there’s a couple of missed spots on a car that’ll be dirty again the next day? If I live through them I have maybe 18 summers with her til she’s out on her own and we’re closing out number 11. As my old friend (now dead) used to tell me when he was fighting cancer, “This ain’t a rehearsal, this is it, the only life you get. Enjoy every second!” That’s it, just some bullshit I needed to remind myself of.

I figure every Surly post is in jest.

Because people really are like sheep. Social media says something’s cool, then you better jump in line! And bitch don’t show up to Barbie not wearing pink!!

I watched a YouTube documentary on Angry Grandma, a YouTuber/TikToker or whatever where this woman’s grandson pranks her and generally makes her mad and she cusses like a sailor and then strings her along to drag it out. Here’s an episode if you feel like watching it. NSFW language.

Because I’m retired and have little else to do, and after 30 years my wife still lets me do naked stuff with her on occasion. An hour of wasted time in a store for a solid two minutes of workout seems like a more than a fair trade at this point in my life.

We went to Wal Mart after lunch and I was killing time while the girls shopped. I knew I had at least an hour before they were going to be ready. Came out of the bathroom at the exact time another guy was reaching for the door to come in and we almost bumped into each other. I gave him an “Excuse me… sorry” and he didn’t reciprocate, just mean mugged me and brushed by. I was thinking what a rude ass he was when I saw his loaded up cart full of stuff he’d left outside the bathroom and spent the next 10 minutes putting everything back on the shelves.

Just checking in…. Hopefully things have started to look up. Hang in there.

Maybe more of a random thoughts…. If you want to smoke, or have a chaw or a dip feel free, but I think you should have to show proof of health insurance to buy tobacco.

Olds and handicapped. And people who don’t care about decent produce.

You know one of those guys is going to pull that blunt out of that corpse’s mouth and hit it.

I should have said it’s fairly quiet other than “Get in the hole!” douchebag yelling it out on a par 4 tee shot.

It’s 1975 and I’m 14. My dad decides I need some life experience or something (once again I’m 14) and sends me off with a harvest crew owned by his buddy. 2 days after school lets out we head down to the TX panhandle and go to work. I’m driving the trucks and combines and working my ass off, 12 hour days were considered short ones. We went through TX, the OK panhandle, SW Kansas, over to Colorado and all the way up through Wyoming before I had to get back for school. It was really a fantastic experience, the guy and his wife treated me like family, I learned a shitload about hard work and how to drink ice cold beer with the crew late at night and still get up at the asscrack and get back to work. Most of the money I made was either sent home or the guy kept it to give to my dad later, I don’t recall, but I had around 7-8 hundred bucks with me when they dropped me off at the bus station in some tiny spot about 25 miles from Montana. They paid for my ticket, told me to stay put for like 9 hours until the bus showed up and they got back on the road. Across the street was a cafe and there was a 1972 Yamaha 250 Enduro for sale out front that was the coolest looking thing I’d ever seen and it just kept looking cooler as the morning went on. I get it in my head that I’m going to buy that bike, ride it home and beat the bus by at least a day! So I ask the bus station guy if my suitcase can go on the bus without me, go across the street and pay $325 bucks for that motorcycle. In retrospect I find it incredibly hard to believe the lady at the cafe sold a 14 year old she’d never seen before a motor vehicle but she did! I had a few hundred bucks in my pocket, a Gulf gas station map, the clothes on my back, a quart of two stroke oil the lady had to throw in and 900 miles to go! I ran out of gas fairly soon and when I was pushing it down the highway a farmer gave me and the bike a ride in his pickup like 40 miles to the next town where I filled up and bought a 2 gallon gas can I bungied to the back by the tail light. . After that the trip went good until it started getting late snd I tried to check into a motel. They wouldn’t rent a kid a room but after calling my dad and the ensuing “WTF are you doing?” conversation they agreed to let me rent a room. I guess my dad didn’t feel like driving to Wyoming or considered my life cheap because when I called him the next morning he said I could keep on with my trip as long as I checked in 3-4 times a day and kept off the highways. So I backroaded it about 750 miles home on a loud ass 250 cc motorcycle with giant knobby tires! Laid it over once on some loose gravel and ran out of gas one more time even with the extra in the can. The hardest part other than getting rooms was figuring a way around Denver and all the suburbs. It took me 3 long days total, winding that thing out about as high as it would go to make it home to The KS/OK border. It took a couple of days for the feeling to come back to my balls after the constant vibration! The ass chewing and punishment for my dumbassery when I made it home sticks with me all these years later, but didn’t stop me from doing much stupider things down the road! After that long trip I think I rode that bike one more time before selling it.

Having golf on a TV is relaxing as it’s fairly quiet, and you can enjoy it without much concentration. It’s great that you and your daughter enjoy volleyball, but would you still go if she weren’t involved?

I have a weird medical thing going on and my Dr wrote me a prescription. My insurance company refused to fill it, even after the Dr wrote two justification letters and resubmitted the prescription. She sent me to a specialist, they prescribed the same med. And it was turned down twice again. It’s probably really expensive, and that’s why they’re fighting it, can’t imagine they’d GAS otherwise. I’m considering taking a trip to Mexico and just bypassing the insurance company altogether. Dumb question enters here… Are there any online sources where you can check availability and cost of stuff in Mexico to help me make up my mind?

In one of the first couple of episodes they draped themselves in zombie guts and were able to just walk around amongst the zombies unnoticed, then immediately abandoned that useful tactic for the rest of the series I watched. The first of a hundred plot holes.

Wrap a wet paper towel around a hot beer when you stick it in the freezer. Ice cold in 10 minutes.

Cleaning out my grandparent’s house and my aunt actually came prepared to fight for that 1970’s set of never been cracked Britannica’s. She didn’t find one.

During my weekend out in publics I realized I really miss the days when fat, completely out of/never attempted to be in shape women had the decency to be appropriately ashamed of their bodies when it came to dressing. Maybe that’s a middle age man thing, maybe I just don’t like looking at two Hefty Bags of cottage cheese stuffed into the back of a pair of white Lycra shorts, IDK…

Why, does he have butthole cancer?