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Alien Octopus

Burnt Ends
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Everything posted by Alien Octopus

  1. Harsin is the answer. If you guys are ready to sell your soul for Urban, I say we bring in A Briles, who knows how to dirty himself with the best of them, and certainly knows how to win.
  2. Well if it testosterone and coke, then hire Briles. We can run a campaign for giving scholarships and voting rights to felons at the same time.
  3. Either he wins the Big XII or GTFO. In light of his track record I am thinking he should GTFO. I would offer Bryan Harsin the job. I believe he has won a lot more games than Mensa and coaches a more appropriate offense for the Big XII. With his resume, he will likely be more aggressive w poaching top coaches. Maybe he can teach his rbs not to reach for the fucking end zone going in and for his gotdamned lines to stay in legal mother fucking formations and have more explosive plays than penalties.
  4. A couple of prayers, I think our line needs divine intervention.
  5. From the 16th floor of the Skyfort in Htown. Texas
  6. How does it compare to the Dixie Cafe? Less klanny?
  7. Social distancing from their fat lil gfs
  8. Is misunderstood, needs more orange slices
  9. Oh you are finished?! Well allow me to retort I have learned a few things this week, that even on Surly, a bastion of dumbfuckery, sport and comedy, that systematic racism does actually exists. Wiith the recent revelation that 2+2=4 is a blatant attempt at heirarchical racism. I, a person of color, am now expected to pass a math test on Surly? One that contains tricky percentages, which clearly is an attempt at silencing me, and smacks of institutional racism. All for the simple task of telling you guys to stop being such pussies. College Football games, Texas in particular, are my form of reparations and I takes what I want. As a proud person of color, and a first generation Cuban-American Latino , I reject your attempt at keeping me on the plantain. Isn’t it enough that your President, Barack, put my brothers in cages, and invaded this bastion of purity with imperial cruise ships? With apologies to my strong sisters, who everyone knows are the key to winning all elections, I must again apologize in advance when I say that all you dripping hatchet wounds who want to clutch your pearls and feign concern over the well-being of players can all eat a giant bag of dicks. You can’t be lining up to blow Hudson Card and Bijan on one post, where they are, according to you dip-shits, placing their lives at risk because of Covid, and then act like this Guajiro/Campesino/Bumpkin is a monster for pointing out that less than 1% means cock when it comes to risk taking. Because of this I am going to have to ask BLM draft me a letter with the following demands: That a patronage fund is set up for this Cubana and Vida Guerra, maybe even a few tasteful statues to be proudly displayed on the West mall. That any song from the Buena Vista Social Club (I vote Chan Chan) replace that racist railroad song, Wabash Cannonball, only to be performed by the LHB, with some Cuban scholarships so you can get some gitdamn rhythm and flare. Clearly, Wabash Cannonball is an homage to your slaver/imperialist foundations. Finally, that Surly replace all explicitly racist handles, starting with the Grand Wizard, Beau Vine with Cuban baseball players names. I think Jose Canseco fits you well Beauregard. If my demands are not met, I will have to boycott all fund raiser and alumni facing events until some meaningful change is made around here. I know that Tom Herman has my back, because he grew up in a single parent household. This is a learning moment, and I hope you all can join the movement. In closing, Power To The People
  10. Yeah I fucked up, I’ll own it, but my point is not any less valid. Cherry pick whatever numbers makes the panic porn juicier, I have a better chance of just about anything .
  11. Two zeroes. Does not make your argument very compelling.
  12. I divided by 330 mm. potatoes patatoes, I’ll go with your number genius.
  13. Why not pick a more arbitrary number? You have no idea how many people will get it. Nobody does.
  14. Yes which is still .0005139% of the population.
  15. Binary logic. You are either alive or dead. Ask the Huskers, they are dead.
  16. So .0005139% Of the population.
  17. I would add Air Force Academy if we need a Colorado School, why not go with the prestige?
  18. Nah they have to blame it on aTm, and play Texas on Thanksgiving in a neutral site in perpetuity.
  19. Needs more jetpack
  20. Had liver problem could not absorb food anymore so had to put him down.
  21. See Ready Pic now 67 in TTT 74 in Total Horn 875 OBO Will insert any Thujones pic into skull upon request for peekaboo into 44 Mag hole. Will deliver to greater Houston, or Austin area for a sixer of Shiner Ruby Red. Otherwise can meet at BBQ joint.
  22. Aggy has infiltrated the Canadian CDC and been doing it right for years... Glory holes could be the key to having safe sex during the coronavirus pandemic ... at least according to Canada's top health experts. The Canadian CDC breaks it down like this ... if you're gonna have sex during the pandemic, it's a helluva lot safer to "use barriers, like walls (e.g., glory holes), that allow for sexual contact but prevent close face-to-face contact."
  23. Just kidding man. I sell VR gear, I can confirm that our high powered gaming units are pretty much sold out.
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