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Sandman

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Posts posted by Sandman

  1. 2 hours ago, MissingInAction said:

    So many dicks, and at that age they were all at eye level.

    Marine Corps boot camp, 70-80 guys and about 8 urinals. Anytime the entire platoon had to go somewhere and we were behind schedule, you would hear the ominous announcement:

    "Hit the head before we go! Double up and triple up on those pissers!". One minute you're taking a regular ol' piss, the next minute, 2-3 dicks are coming at you from all sides like a horrible gangbang.

    • Hook 'Em 1
    • Haha 1
  2. 13 minutes ago, HouTex said:

    Sounds like the widow maker heart attack.  Often no warning and it’s very hard to detect even with scans, stress tests, etc.  I’ve just had my third friend die from one.  

    My dad had the widow maker in 2016. He was at the grocery store but he managed to drive home, get the "cold stuff" put away and then had my nephew take him to the hospital. Why he didn't get an abulance at the store is beyond me. One triple bypass later, he's still hanging around. No clue how he made it. The doc told us at the time that it wasn't looking good. 

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  3. 56 minutes ago, HRSchenker said:

    Everyone knows you're poor as dirt when the lunch lady acknowledges your participation in the reduced/free lunch program

    My kids' school made you put money on their account (unless you got free lunch) and everyone would just give their account number when they got lunch. That way no one would know who got the free lunch. 

  4. One of my twin daughters (no pics) moved out last year and tomorrow the other one is leaving. Neither will be far away but still, an empty nest. I got used to them being gone during the summers at their mom's house over the last 10-12 years, so I'm not too torn up about this. I will miss them but I'll enjoy the quiet time with the Mrs. as well. 

  5. 3 minutes ago, Wulaw Horn said:

    Why do they not announce trades or put them on the scroll?  It’s really hard to jump in and out. 

    IIRC its because of the CBA, they can't announce trades until they've been finalized. 

  6. I had a small stack of mail that was wrapped in a rubber band. When I got to about 5 feet or so from the outbound mail tray, I gave it a nonchalant flick of the wrist and it flipped and twisted in the air and landed perfectly in the tray as if I had gently placed it there, right side up and facing the right way. Of course, nobody was around to witness it.

    • Like 2
  7. Browsing through facebook marketplace and the number of stupid fucks that can't figure out how to use the words "sell" and "sale" in the right context. 

    "For Sell"

    "It's time to sale this, don't need it no more"

    I hate them.

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    • Rage+1 1
  8. My friend's wife was at her boot camp workout place today and one of the guys in her class had a massive heart attack and died, right on the spot. There was a nurse in the class and they immediately went to work on him but he was a goner. He was in his early 50s. My friends and I are all late 40s and we're freaking out a bit. Fuck!

    • Rage+1 1
  9. Went to the bathroom here at the office, headed into the big stall to find that someone had a bout of explosive diarrhea and decided not to flush. I hope that motherfucker dies from dehydration or whatever else they got going on. There's no excuse for leaving that for the next person to discover. 

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  10. 4 hours ago, BabaYaga said:

    One year we tried to surprise him and get his dad's war records

    How does one go about doing this? I'd love to get my grandfather's records so my dad (26 yr USAF vet) could see them.

  11. 5 hours ago, StruggleBus said:

    Can't blame any of the guys that join LIV. $100 million guaranteed to join 8 events? You fucking kidding me? 

    I think it's funny how people fully support the athletes "getting the bag" in every sport but this one. I don't get the vitriol. 

    • Hook 'Em 2
  12. 21 hours ago, Sandbagging Steve said:

    And also deal with ESPN saying the real champion is the SEC champion?

    Espn is losing millions of subscribers a year. There are fewer and fewer people that hear what they're saying or care about it. 

  13. Went on a road trip with the wife for our anniversary this past weekend. She doesn't seem to know left from right, can't look up anything on google maps, can't judge distance. It was all I could do to keep from blowing up at her. I did get laid a couple of times, so I guess it was worth it.

    • Hook 'Em 2
  14. My buddy got free passes to the practice round today, so I drove up from OKC to Tulsa this morning. We both commented that it was fucking hot, then realized it was only 90 and that we were old, fat pussies. Saw Sergio and Rahm, drank a $6 bottle of water, then dropped $400+ at the merch tent. Ate BBQ afterwards, had a blast.

    • Hook 'Em 5
  15. My Whirlpool Cabrio set will turn 9 in july and the washer has about had it. It has a slight leak but it's not constant, it's just some of the time. It roars like a lion when it spins fast, I think it's a bearing or something. I looked at prices the other day and fucking hell, I don't want to spend that much. 

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