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Longhornstampede

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Everything posted by Longhornstampede

  1. It will be the anniversary where Texas sends out invitations to 10 other states and each one of those 10 piggybacks 4 other states (because they're family), except Florida. Florida only asks 3, but Puerto Rico jumps into the car at the last minute. They drink up all the booze at the bar but things are kept going when everyone pools their money together and sends Utah, the only sober state, to HEB on a beer run. At the end of the night, after several spirited arguments and one drunk fight, everyone leaves for home carrying extra plates full of food covered with aluminum foil.
  2. That lamp could have been a post in the stupid shit wives, etc.... Thread
  3. Although I'm sure (I think) none of you have ever been suspected of taking down a federal building.
  4. This thread had me thinking about this song... We made Oklahoma a little after 3 Randy, his brother Bob and my old GMC We had some moonshine whisky And some of Bob's homegrown We were so messed up we didn't know If we were drunk or stoned Randy was a sad-sack, tall kinda frail Bob was a raving maniac, crazy in the head They been kicked out of high school several years ago For pushin over port-a-cans at the 4-H rodeo Since then they've done their little dance Right outside the law Popped twice in Oklahoma, once in Arkansas And I don't know what possessed me To want to tag along Cause I was raised a Christian And I knew right from wrong CHORUS: Right or wrong, black or white Cross the line your gonna pay In the dawn before the light Live and die by the shades of gray We stole two Charolais heifers from Randy's sweetheart's paw Sold them at the livestock sale Outside of Wichita We got $900 and never did suspect The world of hurt we'd be in once We cashed that check Next day we heard the story On the local radio Made our plans that very night To go to Mexico I swear we would have made it If it wasn't for that shine I got sick about the time we crossed That Kansas line CHORUS I was layin in the bar ditch Prayin I would die When a light come on above us And a voice come from the sky A half a dozen unmarked cars Came screeching to a halt They grabbed bob, he started screamin It was all my fault There were men and dogs And helicopter buzzin all around They had the brothers on the Pickup hood and me down on the ground Bob flew all to pieces but randy he Held tight when a black man in a Suit and tie stepped out into the light He told his men to turn us loose They put down their guns He said these are just some Sorry kids, they ain't the ones CHORUS They left us by the roadside Down hearted and alone Randy got behind the wheel Said boys I'm going home We turned around to face our fate Downhearted but alive on that Mornin in late April, Oklahoma, 1995 CHORUS
  5. Well that story was a buzzkill to this thread. Why dont you go ahead and tell us about the day your dog died while you're at it.... I keed, I keed. Glad your buddy is still alive. He is still alive right?
  6. Took the opportunity to fire up this bad boy makes it nice and cozy in the living room. Ha e to sit across the room or it gets too hot.
  7. He takes lessons in negotiating from the Jerry Jones school of football contracts...
  8. How about the fact that he knowingly hired an armorist for his movie set who's only qualification seems to have been that her father was an armorist? Underqualification isn't an excuse when people's lives are at stake. The two people (Baldwin and the armorist) who should have been raising hell about keeping live ammo anywhere near the set, didn't. She is young and may have been intimidated by actors and other people on the set, but that still doesn't excuse Baldwin from not stopping such stupidity. In the end his hiring of her and allowing lax safety practices were probably enough of an indictment to have him charged on those actions alone. FAFO of the corner cutting type...
  9. They do come up for air every now and then
  10. What the fuck does that even mean. And I hadn't really noticed it until your post. Now I can't unheard or uncringe
  11. Can you please just shut the fuck up so we can get back to discussing the merits of still wanting to nail Sally Field? That is what we were talking about, right?
  12. Probably another case of the cops saying "nothing to see here....Just a little misunderstanding. Ooooh look! A black guy walking down the street after sundown. He MUST be up to something. C'mere boahy I need to have a word with you.... "
  13. Fuck that fatch running through the crowd like she owns the place recording some shitty ass footrace. I would have tripped that elephant in that puddle of mud and water and hoped her iphone gazillion (or whatever model they're on now) fell in with her.
  14. Sure if you can get past the fishy smell
  15. That's especially frustrating because liquor stores won't sell ANYTHING before 10am even though you can walk into a grocery store at 7am and buy the same beer you were trying to buy. How did the liquor store even let you in the door before 10am in the first place?
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