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SimonBolivar

Certifiably Surly
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About SimonBolivar

  • Birthday 03/25/2018

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  1. Sweatpants before the plane ride? That's tan suit level controversy! DEFCON 1
  2. "We have questions for some of the bodega owners of Church St and their whereabouts on September 10th. It's no coincidence that the owners are all now Yemeni." -Chorizo probably
  3. No, he's just an 80 year old uncle with social media
  4. More of a Blue Barracudas man myself.
  5. And miss out on Bowling Green vs Kennesaw State on December 23rd from Bumfuck, ID? You sir, are a Christmas Terrorist.
  6. I haven't checked but I'm assuming the murderous double-tap is the manliest thing MAGA has ever seen?
  7. That's what THEY want you to think
  8. B&W cookie at Pasticceria Rocco is pretty good on your way back to Joe's.
  9. Coincidently enough, I had a Joe's (West Vill location) vs Bleecker Street slice-off on Friday and Joe's won, but Bleecker does have more seating.
  10. I don't understand why B&W cookies didn't expand much beyond the NE and Mid-Atlantic. Babka is amazing, but too Jewish for the rest of the country. Everyone can understand and enjoy a B&W cookie.
  11. And they've never been anywhere else or know anyone else from a foreign country (outside Latin America) to dispute it.
  12. I have a MAGA uncle who is on 100% disability due to being fat during Desert Storm when he was stationed in Saudi Arabia and hurting his knees and back. He continually sends letters to my place of employment (bank that he doesn't have an account with) addressed to our CEO because one of our locations in the Lubbock area has a flagpole that doesn't have a flag on it. I guess he just drives around Lubbock all day looking for flag code violations and other things to be mad about.
  13. Survived another trip without getting shoved or stabbed. Did see an older dude get his knee blown up by a biker while jaywalking. Biker just looked back with disgust and kept on going.
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