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South Austin

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by South Austin

  1. First you set the microwave on high . . . .
  2. Wife No. 2 is currently sleeping in the guest room. She's 52 and in perimenopause, and one of her symptoms is horrible sleep patterns, usually being wide awake in the middle of the night for an hour or so, and getting long sustained chunks of sleep during the night has become difficult. She's volunteered to take the guest room most nights so she's not waking me up, and because I often start my weekday morning routine before her and need access to the master bathroom, etc.
  3. Fucker probably has his eye on some cheap cleared land in Manhattan.
  4. Neither of these people have ever been in my kitchen.
  5. Brat’s photo from that day.
  6. I lived in North Carolina at the time and was a senior in high school. I remember hearing about that on the national news, and being awfully disturbed at the brutality and the fact that the victims were around my age.
  7. Like how you can’t find a decent fast-food yogurt in Austin anymore?
  8. Holy shit, Akina’s coming back?!?!
  9. I'd kill somebody for a Thundercloud meatball sub right now.
  10. Edited.
  11. Many might look at this assignment as a new opportunity. But no, not you, Mr. Glass-Is-Half-Empty.
  12. And then you peed your pants to show him that all the cool kids pee their pants these days.
  13. My first car was a beige 1983 Rabbit. My second was a 1991 Jetta. I drove both of them into the ground and had little to no maintenance problems with them.
  14. It’s always the same, it’s just a shame.
  15. Look Bud, we know what’s good for the kids!
  16. Maybe Hopfields. A little north of campus. Or grab a burger at Crown & Anchor or Dirty’s if you want something more old school UT. Arturo’s is a great breakfast spot. Downtown but just a couple blocks south of campus.
  17. “I have a better solution. You keep me on the payroll as an outside consultant and in exchange for my salary, my job will be never to tell people these things that I know. I don't even have to come into the office, I can do this job from home.”
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