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South Austin

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by South Austin

  1. It’s all about the lettuce.
  2. “I can run out of time all day.”
  3. All I know is that there’s no better place to get a Chicago beef sandwich than Katy, Texas.
  4. Those fuckers hired Graham Harmon as their communications director.
  5. Nice deluge in NW Austin to wash away the oak jizz.
  6. I just planted a coffee tree in my back yard.
  7. Quick, somebody send him a pic of a vagina!
  8. And you don't even need to provide air conditioning or restroom breaks. We are so back, America!
  9. Well, it wouldn't be the first time that having a baby saves a marriage.
  10. This is an actual book, and I bought an old copy of Amazon for a friend as a gag birthday present. Amazon link The reviews are outstanding:
  11. Oh come on, let Lutz have some fun with aggy and get a raise.
  12. Hiring an assistant with no head coaching experience to take over a national champion runner up baseball team and go from preseason No. 1 to unranked and in the SEC basement is a pretty nice work of destruction.
  13. Chuck Schumer still tells knock-knock jokes.
  14. The judges will also accept this:
  15. It's also okay to say cunt.
  16. "But honey, they're offering a 10-year contract of $50 million a year, fully guaranteed with no buy out!"
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