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Paper_jam

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Everything posted by Paper_jam

  1. Paper_jam
  2. Paper_jam
    128 possible outcomes?! If only we had available to us some type of calculating machine, capable of rapid computations and the application of rigorous logic, that could solve for these outcomes and lay forth a definitive and complete analysis of this seemingly impenetrable mystery.
  3. Paper_jam
    Neighborhood book clubs have a lot more drama than I thought
  4. Paper_jam
    Oh, please may I be the first driver to go over one of the reworked holes full of quickpatch at 200 MPH? That sounds super safe.
  5. Paper_jam
    Sark has a Commodore 64 in Belmont running simulations of every possible scenario in a continuous updating loop. They got this. (The same computer is used to compute game day halftime adjustments.)
  6. Paper_jam
    Something something honor code?
  7. Paper_jam
    Was the old Bonanza chain better, worse, or same as Golden Corral or Sirloin Stockade? Somehow I never made it to a Bonanza before they went belly up.
  8. Paper_jam
    I was hoping this was the start of a new Holiday Season Family Bitch thread but I guess it's still a little too early to start that. But Thanksgiving is just around the corner!
  9. Paper_jam
    Y'all are pretty hard on Dusty. Baseball isn't all statistics and logic and beep boop decisions arrived at through methodical reasoning. Baseball is magical. It's instinctive. It ebbs and flows with the intangible, unquantifiable currents of the universe. Sometimes you just have to close your eyes, turn off the targeting computer, and trust in the force.
  10. Paper_jam
    On defense? Well, we didn't allow** their QB (or anyone else) to run on us. (But giving up so much in passing kind of diminishes that.) We also recovered a fumble and got one interception. On offense: our running game was pretty solid, when Sark would actually put in running plays other than "run into the pile in the middle." We didn't give up any fumbles or interceptions.
  11. Paper_jam
    Giving up 378 passing yards against a team that only had 233 passing yards against UTSA does not make me feel good about this secondary. Heck, UTSA held UH to 17 total points.
  12. Paper_jam
    I don't have kids so I've been saving the state a small fortune for years. Do I get a voucher?
  13. Paper_jam
    How the fuck does this family dollar min wage Purdy punk who looks like a 15 year old kid dominate and shred the vaunted Dallas Cowboy defense like tissue paper? Zillion dollar Dak is completely helpless (yeah, the OL sucks, the receivers can't get open, but I'm used up on excuses for Dak . The 49ers look like a well oiled football machine, quick and precise and creative. Dallas plays like a janky random pile of spare parts with no coherent execution or plan. Dallas only looks good when they play the worst teams in the league.
  14. Paper_jam
    Line needs to build up more to the west
  15. Paper_jam
    Is tonight's game available on TV in Austin?
  16. Paper_jam
    I hear the updated vaccines upgrade real-world content to 4K HDR.
  17. Paper_jam
    It's hard to believe how much it's changed in a generation. I was admitted to UT in '89 and it seemed like you could be a total mushroom and still get in with nothing more than a pretty good SAT (1250+). I don't think there was an essay, or any real need for extracurriculars. UT even threw money at me even though my family had no financial need., Tuition was like $400-500 a semester those first couple of years. I was practically making a profit.
  18. Paper_jam
    Fucking horrid game. Got beat badly by a bunch of scrubs and losers. We can't contain this fucking Dobbs guy? Why the fuck is the end zone like Kryptonite to Dallas? Shameful loss.
  19. Paper_jam
  20. Paper_jam
    5th Circuit is total clownball
  21. Paper_jam
    I can't really decide. Fuck Baylor on general principles, but then I think back to the Crabtree catch in '08.
  22. Paper_jam
    Lost in a Guatemalan jungle? With the Urban Sweatsuit from J Peterman, you'll be as dry and comfortable as if you were still in your air conditioned West Side brownstone. Inspired by the practice of Central American natives who learned that lining their underclothing with shredded palm fronds would wick away sweat and odor. A patent-pending blend of natural fibers and advanced biopolymers to control moisture while still providing excellent breathability.
  23. Paper_jam
    These kids today with the dreadful, vulgar rappin music and the backward caps and baggy pants, always on the burner phones and beepers. My generation was sensible, having come of age during the estimable Reagan Era.
  24. Paper_jam

    Longhorn Network

    Paper_jam replied to TXs's topic in Football

    I can't believe I bought a month of Sling just for tonight's game on LHN. (Which was choppy as fuck at 30 FPS, what the fuck, Sling, its 2023, you can't manage 60 FPS in sports?)
  25. Paper_jam
    Buncha corrupt cowards, protecting each other. We live in a banana republic. I can't wait to GTFO this state.

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