Having lived in HOU, ATX, SAT, and DFW, SAT would be my choice of the four in which to raise a family. For me, it's the big city that doesn't feel "big," 2 hours from the coast (and fishing), and close to the hill country for outdoor recreation. Definitely live on the north and west side suburbs or, if you don't mind a commute, something like Boerne.
Pros, other than what I mention above: better climate than Houston IMO; would give you new places to explore for your photography; less traffic; low cost of living; HEBs everywhere, which is nice if/when they are open.
Cons: Houston has better food (and service) overall; no hometown pro football and baseball (if you are into those things); airport (already covered above); theoretically fewer employment opportunities.
OP, it sounds like San Antonio might be a good fit for you. 41y/o... midlife crisis... quit your job, pick up the family, and move!