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Red Five

Certifiably Surly
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    18304
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Everything posted by Red Five

  1. I was a valet at the Marriott downtown the summer of 1995. Memories include but are not limited to, Nate Newton calling a cab early one morning for a, ahem, professional who had shared a room with him the night before, and an extremely drunk Captain Harris from Police Academy (the dickhead) fetching his car and driving away hammered. It was a great job.
  2. 12k planes and 7k ships involved on D-Day. Probably a tad more complex.
  3. Our Secretary of Defense doesn’t sound any different than Sean Spicer.
  4. Yes and Henry Melton would have scored a TD and put the game away.
  5. “Totally destroyed!! They’ll never ever have nukes now!” Fucking child.
  6. He’s still bragging about having to take a cognitive test. Where he correctly identified animals and shit.
  7. That was a really good throw.
  8. Is it normal to have a staggered ceasefire like that? Where one side stops six hours before the other?
  9. He’s throwing a bitch fit over the difference between destroyed and pretty well destroyed? Also, Allison Cooper. Do you get it? It’s because Anderson Cooper is gay. Funny stuff, from the president also making n-word jokes earlier.
  10. I'm just so glad the children are gone and that the adults are back in charge.
  11. Would there be anything left of Iran if they did that?
  12. I think the edge room seriously consisted of only Jett Bush.
  13. These ads for Fresh Pet, where the worst people on earth rummage through people's fridges, and then react with shock and disgust when they learn that the person whose house they're visiting, as a guest, owns dog food. And, *gasp* keeps it refrigerated!
  14. Whoa whoa now hold on there a second.
  15. I’m confused. How can the same people who support this also support our current president, who seemingly goes out of his way to break as many commandments as possible? If it doesn’t matter, as it seemingly doesn’t, then why have them anywhere at all?
  16. Take your fucking hat off indoors, white trash.
  17. Doing some math.... I don't think Sally wanted Kaydon Finley to exist.
  18. It's so insane that, of all people, Donald Trump has the sole power to decide when we go to war. Like if we were all waiting for Carrot Top or Mr. T to decide if we're gonna bomb someone or not.
  19. Dotard announced it on one of his stupid truths things. Talking about it on the news stations.
  20. Well, we bombed Iran.
  21. Three "hi"s from Gerry H just now. No clue how many outstanding that makes.
  22. Hey, a relevant one! Really happy with how DT is going. All three of these guys look like great takes.
  23. Was it Jermichael Finley who they had to bring in Sally Brown to coach him up on how to use condoms, because he kept knocking girls up? I know that's a crazy sentence, but I swear it happened with someone of that era.
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