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Red Five

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by Red Five

  1. Nuclear War sounds fun!
  2. That two-parter was badass. Captain Dickhead comes in and everyone fucking hates him, but then he gets the job done in the end. "Oh, and I understand you are holding a starfleet officer named Jean-Luc Picard. I expect him to be returned. Immediately."
  3. I think it's just good old fashioned lying. Or alternative facts.
  4. I guess we should be talking more shit about American POWs.
  5. I suppose in the context of this show, he was more pissed that they lied to him about it. Which, ok I guess. Proceed.
  6. TripleSecDef: "Trump is awesome! He is the bestest there has ever been! None of us would even be alive today if it weren't for Dotard! Also, stop politicizing this!".
  7. He was extraordinarily drunk. So drunk I asked the manager, "Um, we can't let him drive, can we?". He just shrugged and said go get his keys. Off he went.
  8. But some of the time I’m a drunken slob who will watch 12 hours of college football in one day.
  9. A poorly attended inauguration has to be called the most attended ever. Maybe I’m giving myself too much credit, but I’d like to think that if my boss asked me to go on tv and tell a bunch of obvious lies for no reason at all… I probably would lose all respect for that person and quit. Like if CDC made Sark go on tv and claim that actually we won the last three national championships in football. And if you disagree then you’re an idiot who just hates Texas. But this isn’t something silly like college athletics. It’s the most powerful person in the world.
  10. I was a valet at the Marriott downtown the summer of 1995. Memories include but are not limited to, Nate Newton calling a cab early one morning for a, ahem, professional who had shared a room with him the night before, and an extremely drunk Captain Harris from Police Academy (the dickhead) fetching his car and driving away hammered. It was a great job.
  11. 12k planes and 7k ships involved on D-Day. Probably a tad more complex.
  12. Our Secretary of Defense doesn’t sound any different than Sean Spicer.
  13. Yes and Henry Melton would have scored a TD and put the game away.
  14. “Totally destroyed!! They’ll never ever have nukes now!” Fucking child.
  15. He’s still bragging about having to take a cognitive test. Where he correctly identified animals and shit.
  16. That was a really good throw.
  17. Is it normal to have a staggered ceasefire like that? Where one side stops six hours before the other?
  18. He’s throwing a bitch fit over the difference between destroyed and pretty well destroyed? Also, Allison Cooper. Do you get it? It’s because Anderson Cooper is gay. Funny stuff, from the president also making n-word jokes earlier.
  19. I'm just so glad the children are gone and that the adults are back in charge.
  20. Would there be anything left of Iran if they did that?
  21. I think the edge room seriously consisted of only Jett Bush.
  22. These ads for Fresh Pet, where the worst people on earth rummage through people's fridges, and then react with shock and disgust when they learn that the person whose house they're visiting, as a guest, owns dog food. And, *gasp* keeps it refrigerated!
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