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Disco Strangler

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  1. He’s wearing Kevlar or is fatter than a few months ago
  2. Because of his botched penis surgery?
  3. To me, it will always be El Golfo de Los Estados Unidos. Just the same way that the ComManDerS will forever be known to me as The Washington Football Team.
  4. Johnny: Teacher, what does "adultery" mean in the seventh commandment? Texas Public School Teacher: Well Johnny, adultery is what President Trump did when he raw dogged a porn star's worn out vagina with his mushroom dick while Melania was home taking care of little Barron. It's also what Ken Paxton does with his mistress because his wife Angela doesn't want to stick a finger in his butthole when she's sucking him off. Johnny: [insert WTF gif here]
  5. Careful what you whish for.
  6. I would rather torture myself by going to see Shen Yun.
  7. Tales from the fake assignation attempt.
  8. Leon to barber: ‘have you seen The Fifth Element? Barber: say no more, fam.
  9. Harsh, but allowed. We are ruled by a sadder Force.
  10. Doing tariffs like a game of Red Light, Green Light. That’s the kind of steady governance that calms the markets and consumer confidence.
  11. If there were a “deep state,” some mutha fuckas would be falling out of windows by now. What is taking so long?
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