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Chooky

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Everything posted by Chooky

  1. My dick is so huge (in Cambodia). I tap sternum (in Cambodia). My nickname is Pole Pot (in Cambodia).
  2. It's clear to me that we won't be safe until every little league player is armed during their game. And that training should begin in tee ball or maybe even at the embryo stage.
  3. Ah, America's other pastime.
  4. Shining a heat lamp on your crotch is alpha as fuck.
  5. He did some weird shit but he seemed to have a general streak of decency and pragmatism. He was articulate and witty. I doubt he could've pretended to be dumb enough for this new electorate.
  6. She admitted to being judgy as fuck.
  7. Lobo is Spanish for 'Teen Wolf Too',' starring Jason Bateman.
  8. True, but no doubt he'd support a bill to incarcerate anyone for doing the same.
  9. I heard that term applied to specific supporters of Beto. Or something.
  10. Ditchpig has just been officially added to my permanent lexicon. My phone even tried to correct it and i said no, phone, you will recognize it and like it. If someone asks, I will give general credit to protect the innocent. "I learned it from some judgy Alabama wine moms with the nice calves."
  11. I saw her and Principal Skinner in the closet making babies and then she ate the baby and the baby looked at me.
  12. I used the bathroom in an Allsup's in McCamey, TX. Someone wrote the word "shit" with actual ... shit. I hope it was just a mentally ill local. Otherwise, there's a serial killer traveling through West Texas right now.
  13. Less fiber. Not as dry. But still similar.
  14. Remember that time Rudy was trying to redeem himself from giving a press conference next to a garden hose and a stack of mulch and then in his next press conference ash tray juice started leaking out of his head?
  15. One morning a friend and I were quail hunting and his dog stopped and took a huge, wet, yellow dump. There was a small cool front that morning so it had steam coming off of it. The sun casted a glare on it. A shining mound of warm shit. Sorry. That interview reminded me of something different. I get distracted.
  16. It's funny how most of the people who still latch onto to 2017 trend phraseology like beta male, and cuck, and soy boy, think shit like this is what "masculine" resembles. "Saturday is for the boys! Let's totally not be gay like the soy libs and have a dudes only weekend! Knock back some brews, go to the shooting range, pack into the sauna later and moisturize each other's bronzed taints! Fuck yeah, bro!" Tucker is probably so removed from normalcy these days that it's difficult to understand how people work anymore. All he knows is that when his ratings slightly slump he needs to kick out some white nationalist tones to bump things up a bit.
  17. That rapper is a testament to overcoming fetal alcohol syndrome. I don't want to mock the disabled, but that dude's eyes are way too close together. It makes me uncomfortable. Don't let him pet the rabbits.
  18. Especially during an election year.
  19. He makes horrible decisions. He'll be perfect. You'll miss guys like him and that level of erudition when the senate is eventually just a keg party of dudes punching holes in the sheet rock and passing legislation based on who could piss the furthest or light the biggest fart.
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