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Crapinon

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Everything posted by Crapinon

  1. I know a few "the world is coming to an end" survivalist people. One of him carries 3 handguns on him at all times and at least 3 rifles in his car. On the back of his baseball cap he has 2 lead weights with spikes on them. If he felt threatened enough, he would grab the brim of his cap and swing it, aiming for the eyes, with the intent of blinding said threat. I know this has nothing to do with this situation but I'll throw it out there as a PSA.
  2. This one terrifies me more. I can't even imagine what it was like before it was paved all the way to the top.
  3. MIghty bold talk for someone who quit his job/team in the middle of October because he was getting his ass spanked and couldn't win.
  4. LOL. No sporks. We do have some spoons that went around the garbage disposal a couple of times that have some pretty rough edges though
  5. We have 25 forks in the silverware drawer. A full set of sterling silver in the China cabinet. A picnic basket with plasticware for 4 and a party box with plasticware for birthday parties. Unless the Amazing Kreskin comes back from the dead and bends all our forks I think we have it covered. Same with salt and pepper, ketchup and packets of mustard. I've got a refrigerator and cabinet full of that stuff. I don't need to have a drawer full of salt packets I'm never going to touch unless a 500 pound slug makes a beeline for the house.
  6. Does she also save all the really cheap plastic forks and spoons from take out meals? Mine does. I guess it's just on case we run out of all the 2 completes sets of silverware we have laying around and can't wash anything.
  7. Amarillo goes from being pleasant to smells like you're living in a cows ass in less than 5 seconds.
  8. My wife qualifies to be a DAR and thought it was interesting from a historical sense. So when I found out that I had a great-grandfather that was in a Texas unit of the civil war I looked at the Sons of Confederate Veterans website. I took me 5 minutes to realize what whack jobs these guys are. One of their great resources to explain the war is a book called "A Confederate Catechism" written in 1929. In it are gems such as; the war wasn't fought over slavery, succession of the states actually limited slavery, not promote it and firing on Ft Sumpter was not the start of the war. Lincoln started the war by sending troops to Florida and they were simply trying to repel the northern marauders.
  9. Crapinon

    Prison Rodeos

    The obvious choice
  10. Oh HELL to the NO. She is the anti-aggy.
  11. My daughter was a member of a college marching band that had previously been all male only a few years earlier. Some of the guys resented the women and hazed them continually. She informed me that deer urine works quite well too when seeking retribution.
  12. 38 years for us too. I learned a valuable lesson from my FIL. I love my MIL but she nagged him constantly when he was alive. He got to the point where he just ignored most of her nagging and said he never heard her. Eventually she believed he was going deaf so unless she was in his sight she quit the nagging and blaming and chalked it up to he didn't hear her because he was deaf. Unfortunately my wife knew he was doing it so I can't pull it with her. I just tell her it's male pattern deafness and I miss the first sentence of what she says to me.
  13. Yeah, like that will ever happen. We celebrated Fathers Day with me taking my adult kids out and buying their dinner.
  14. I would tell her there are two types of countries in the world. Those who use the metric system and those who have put men on the moon.
  15. I'm not sure if this was supposed to be serious or not because I only made it 30 seconds before I considered piercing my eardrums and turned it off.
  16. No particular post to tie it to but this seems like it should go here. Tornado with feet and Hulk Hogan in a dress.
  17. It takes all kinds of critters to make Farmer Vincent fritters
  18. Crapinon

    Bucket of rats

    We had a cat that wouldn't touch their bodies. He would simply eat their brains out of the top of their heads and then leave them laying there.
  19. I have actually got phone calls from the phone number of the cell phone I was answering.
  20. But we can still come here to say we hate Arkansas, can't we?
  21. Try pulling them up from around your ankles.
  22. Well I grew up watching Disney nature shows and Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom with Marlin Perkins. I consider myself a wildlife expert and I would be sadly remiss if I allowed actual facts and a police report to interfere with my preconceived notions.
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