It's a busy recruiting weekend for the Texas Longhorns. As visitors being to arrive, Head Coach Steve Sarkisian whips out his photos app.
"Oh hey there 5 Star Recruit, welcome to Austin! My name is Steve. I'm excited to be able to tell you about the Texas Longhorns. But first, let me show you these screenshots. Can you believe that AgSince39 would say that about A&M players and recruits!? Quite rude, if you ask me. Now go on ahead for a tour of the stadium with Position Coach. I'm going to show this here photo to more of your peers and I'll see you after!"
"Hello again 5 Star Recruit! I hope you enjoyed the tour with Position Coach. Now that we're talking again, let me show you this screenshot of what InSalesOfWk88 said about their QB playing through injury. Oh, position coach already showed you that one? That's good. We make sure to take every opportunity to show you these screenshots. Have you seen this one of LoochNutsYum? It is extra vulgar. Oh, you'd like to commit? And it's because of the screenshots? Well I can't say I'm surprised; LoochNutsYum works every time. Go that way and tell them you committed so they can make your graphic and let 247 know to bump your rating."
'Muahaha,' Steve thinks to himself. 'It's a good thing Jimbo and his staff are so virtuous. I can't talk good, scheme an offense, or coach QBs like him, but he can't match my subterfuge. Those Aggies are the best fans in sports - and Kyle field is a marvel of engineering - but by making fake TexAgs accounts and saying mean things, I'm able to turn their greatest advantage - the Vaunted 12th Man! - against them. Bwahaha what a ruse.'