Not a big fan of Monterrey proper, but there’s the whole Aquarium/ Cannery Row thing for kids. Pacific Grove is great - I believe @Hefeweizenwould be your local guide, but I like Passionfish a lot for their wine list. We’ve stayed at the Gosby and liked it.
We stay in Carmel, no favorite place in particular but we seem to end up at Vagabond and La Paya frequently. You’ve got Ocean Avenue and the beach for kids, but Carmel is quite literally an old money enclave. Lots of tasting rooms, boutiques and art galleries. We like Stationaery for brunch, Casanova for dinner (epic wine cellar) and Vesuvio for late night drinks (Barmel for late late night drinks). La Playa bar has a great sunset view. Chez Noir is the hot new spot with the James Beard nomination; have not been but have heard good things
If you want to hit up a winery, Folktale is a great all-around experience just 15 or so minutes down Carmel Valley Road.
Obviously, there’s tons of outdoors stuff. Point Lobos is just a few minutes south and, of course, there’s Big Sur. That can be a whole trip or a 1/2 day from Carmel if you just want to head down for some views and lunch.