It had already been a long weekend with Girl from Tech, and it was only Saturday. She had just gotten through roughing me up in the backseat of her BMW X2 when I managed the strength to open the back hatch and stumble out, determined to seek sustenance and refuel my loins. I looked left and right and asked myself "Where am I?" when a homeless man responded from afar: "You ain't never been here, kid, and you'll never be here again." I filed that advice for future pondering and shuffled down a narrow alleyway with stray cats and loose women bordering the cobblestone path. I knew I didn't belong, but I had to go on. No way would I make it out of the next Girl from Tech punishment without at least a little something to stave off death for a few hours longer. Anything would do. Suddenly... in front of me... there it was. Magnolia Cafe on Lake Austin Boulevard. I patted myself on the back (which hurt from the earlier lashings) for my luck and went in and sat at a booth. "What's good tonight?" I asked the dreadlocked waiter. "Don't worry, honey. I've got just the thing you need." After a couple more hours, I came out of the bathroom and sat back in my booth and ordered the Mag's Mud queso. It was pretty good.