-
Posts
1920 -
Joined
-
Last visited
Content Type
Profiles
Forums
Store
Downloads
Recruiting - 2020
2019-2020 Football Season
Football
Entertainment
Sports
News and Business
Cloak Room
Transfer Portal
Recruiting
Events
Everything posted by campcrunk
-
Texas Recruiting Notes 2025: Duck Around and Find Out
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
It seems to me like shawarma is theoretically "nature's" perfect nutricious food. Healthy, insanely delicious, packed with lots really good veggies and nutrients. That said, as much I love them (and I REALLY do love them. I could seriously eat shawarma for just about every meal, including breakfast), give me a far less "perfectly nutricious" bacon double cheeseburger or a big ass ribeye 9.9 times out of 10. Fried chicken and perfectly cooked BBQ work too. -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2025: Duck Around and Find Out
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
That's pretty much exactly how typing it felt. Except it was like I was just doing it over and over and then I kept going anyway because I was spurred on by the Ja'Quinden Jackson vs. Danny Young rage (if you couldn't tell, and you can read, so I assume that you can, those Danny Young pitches still keep me up at night). Once I got going, I just couldn't stop. And to the person who asked about Erick Fowler, I actually did start to write about him (and a few others I'm sure you'll all remember) and decided I'd already had enough self-inflicted, 5-star powered nut shots. Texas Football from 2010 to 2021: masochistic genital torture at it's most joyless, anguished, hopeless, and utterly miserable (sorry, Sark - there was still way too much Tom Herman mentality left on that 2021 team. Also: Casey Thompson started - which is basically the same thing) -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2025: Duck Around and Find Out
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
DP. Disregard. Sorry -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2025: Duck Around and Find Out
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
We just have SO MANY "fun," "little" recruiting hiccups to look back on "fondly" from the Charlie/Herman years. Terrell Cuney, Cameron Hampton (WHO?), Lorenzo Joe, Chris Warren, Kai Locksley, Cameron Townsend (what's with all the LBs named "Cameron" that I do not remember at all?), Buck Major, Garrett Thomas, Patrick Hudson (alas, what could have been - under the pretty significant assumption that we didn't fuck up his development ALL the way up. Which is a MASSIVE gamble and probably not at all realistic given our staff at the time. Sigh...), Jeff McCulloch, Kyle Porter (saw him play in HS. I could've sworn he was even better than Rodney Anderson, though it's hard to tell behind the grown ass men Katy rolls out on OL. Turns out that they both just kind of sucked), Jean DeLance (see what proper development can do for you??? I don't give a shit that he didn't do anything in the NFL. He was damn solid in college. For Florida😠). And who could possibly forget JP Urquidez? Certainly not @Tex Pete. Then, OF COURSE, we have the amazing, astonishing, astounding, absolutely unparalled Florida Five. Thanks to Davante Davis for being the only one was worth a shit, managing to last through one, single, solitary motherfucking practice without quitting, AND having the grades to make it onto campus in the first place. Also, does the name "Shiro Davis" ring a bell for anyone? Me neither. Oh, and hey! Who wants to see Tom Herman call a pitch to Danny Young on 4th and 0.5 so we can watch him promptly lose 3 yards and turn the ball over at our own 40 while looking like he's running through quicksand? Good times, good times. Herman EASILY had some of the most baffling turnovers on downs I've ever seen. And I LOVE it when coaches are aggressive and do that. Herman was just godawful at it. Then, of course, we had the other "magnificant" offensive "weapons" Herman and his cadre of imbicile assistants and yes men brought in. Montrell Estell (when he wasn't switching back and forth to DB), Reese Moore, Reese Leitao, doctor and amateur pharmacist (and as an part time amateur pharmicist myself, I don't even respect his work in that field. Xanax? How generic and uncreative can you get? Go get you some 4-HO-MiPT, DPT, or DiPT. Or, if you absolutely have to sell benzos instead of something cool, try Pyrazolam, Bromazolam, Flubrotizolam, or Flubromazolam. They're not even technically illegal as long as marked "not for human consumption" and/or you put the little skull and crossbones on the container thanks a loophole in the Federal Analogue Act you could pilot an aircraft carrier through), Toneil (excuse me: Toenail) Carter, Jordan Pouncey, Brennan "Alligator Arms" Eagles, Josh Moore's unregistered gat, Malcom Epps (probably my personal favorite. "Bama wanted him so he MUST be good!!1" Saban would have trapdoored his ass 15 seconds after he set foot in Tuscaloosa. Assuming, of course, that the only reason we got him at all isn't because Saban had already trapdoored his ass. And then, "offensive wunderkind genius" Lincoln Riley takes him? That alone should disprove every "Riley is an incredible coach" argument we've ever had on this board), and Casey Thompson, annihilator of locker rooms. Who could forget good old Casey Thomson, his proud papa, and their insistence that Casey was worlds better than Ehlinger. We should also note that Thompson (and dear old dad, of course. I wonder if he got to keep the orange jumpsuit from that SI cover?) played at least some small part in Cam Rising bolting for Utah - though I concede most of it had to do with Rising's idiotic assumption that he'd come take Sam's job from day 1), Tyler Johnson, Javonne Shephard (lol), Ja'Quinden Jackson (GOD FUCKING DAMMIT, HERMAN AND YURCICH. We had this guy as a potential wildcat QB or powerback and we were running pitches to DANNY FUCKING YOUNG on 4th and inches???!!) and, of course, Keaontay Ingram (here come the intrusive thoughts and involuntary flashbacks of the LSU game which will probably be followed by seizures and months long severe depression...). And, of course, Herman's defensive recruiting. Just... MWAH! *Chef's kiss.* Jalen Green, Tyler Owens, Juwan "I'm collecting AARP checks dven though I'm still transferring between schools" Mitchell, Prince Dorbah ("just look at that first step! He's like our very own Von Miller!"), Xavion Aford, Sawyer Goram-Welch (counting him as a DT since that's what he was recruited as - even though he's found a way to be a complete non-factor (or worse) on BOTH sides of the ball now), and Caleb Johnson ("if he ever gets on the field, he's like Gary Johnson but bigger and faster! Really! I swear! Guys? Guys? Where are you going?"). And, to save the absolute best for last, the tin man himself, BJ Foster. Maybe the single most frustrating Texas defensive back I've ever had the misfortune to watch. Say what you want about Taafe, Schooler, and Haines. At least they left everything on the field when they played. Foster, on the other hand, couldn't even be bothered to run down multiple very stoppable touchdown plays and plenty of other long gains when he didn't feel like it. Meanwhile, Breckyn Hager is still MASSIVELY overrunning the backfield somewhere. He's probably several hundred miles behind the play by now and still going, determined to get to that QB. Don't ever give up, little buddy. You'll get to freshman Brock Purdy someday, even if you have to sprint all the way to San Francisco to do it. Well. What a "fun" little walk down memory lane. I think almost everyone here knows I could keep going on this. For a long, LONG time. But I think this post is already too long (and disheartening, enraging, and just plain miserable enough). Also, I prefer not to disparage MOST kids who decide to be Longhorns as long as they try, aren't complete fuckups, or aren't just bad guys. Anyway, now that I've remembered all of that and even done some research on it, I'm gonna go drink a whole container of bleach, swallow 3 bottles of Oxy, and stick my head in the oven just to make sure I get the "job" done. Sincere thanks to Bijan, Sam, Roschon, Lil'Jordan, Collin Johnson, Sweat, Ford, Cosmi, Poona, and some other guys for making our games under Herman and Strong (usually) bearable to watch. Especially when Herman actually bothered to play Bijan. -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2025: Duck Around and Find Out
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
I really like KJ Lacey. I think the upper middle class man's Bryce Young comparison's are dead on. He's going to be a stud. That said, give me Keelon Russell all day, every day. Frankly, at the rate that Russell seems improving developing, it's not that close. He's a must get whether we take 1 or 2 QBs. I certainly woudln't complain about getting Lacey - not one bit, even if he's the only QB in the class - but if we have the option and only wind up with one QB, it should be Russell. Then again, I remember another QB named "Russell" (first name, this time) who just seemed to get better and better and we wound up not getting him. That turned out GREAT because we still wound up with a top 20 prospect and the top pocket passer in the country who wound up winning a Super Bowl ring. I'll always look back fondly on the name "Garrett Gilbert." No, wait. Sorry. What's the polar opposite of "fondly?" Ah well. At least Shepard (and that other state traitor Craig Loston, for that matter) never wound up doing shit either. Speaking of "state traitors," fuck Jamarkus McFarland's do-nothing, never-was ass too. -
Negative Recruiting Your Own School: The aggy Screenshot Megathread
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
If Aggies were characters in a work of fiction, I would give said book a negative review on the ground that "this group of weirdos they keep talking about is just WAY too strange, paranoid, insane, and simply too plain stupid to be believable." -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2025: Duck Around and Find Out
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Is Ozempic going to give him vastly better athleticism? I hate that he's not a take despite clearly loving us so much but sometimes that's just the way it goes. -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2025: Duck Around and Find Out
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
That is a tough, TOUGH question. Leaving out stuff that's not technically from "that era" (like the Misfits, George Clinton, Sonic Youth, Minor Threat, the Descendants, Jawbreaker, Screeching Weasel (before Ben Weasel hit a girl, anyway), Arrested Development (the music group AND the show, actually) etc.) I was really into a lot of different stuff. I loved the Murder City Devils, Cursive, Explosions in the Sky, the Toadies, Grandaddy, the Desaparecidos, the Appleseed Cast, Captain Jazz, Metric, the Faint, Stars, the Roots, Weezer, Belle & Sebastian, Modest Mouse, Sunny Day Real Estate, Reggie and the Full Effect, the Get Up Kids (and the New Amsterdams), Alkaline Trio, AFI, Against Me!, Outkast, Godspeed You! Black Emperor, Rancid/Op Ivy , Smashing Pumpkins, the Postal Services (although I was never a huge Deathcab fan), the Silversun Pickups... I could go on and on and on - and I was lucky enough to get to see most of those Acts while I was in school. Even though Austin was definitely starting to change for the worse back then, it was still nothing like it is now. We got a LOT of great acts coming through to play small, intimate venues, which was always awesome. Now that I'm an old (even an occasionally drug soaked one), I have no idea if that's still the case Anyway, it's really hard to pick a favorite. I guess I can say that Cursive and Alkaline Trio particularly resonated with me back then even though, musically speaking, Alkaline Trio really wasn't anything special. Then, when bands likes the National, Frightened Rabbit, and We Were Promised Jetpacks came along just a little bit later (missed Frightened Rabbit's first SXSW shows - it was a promo for their real show that they did at the old Urban Outfitters of all places in 2006 - by like 15 minutes. I must've walked by to visit my then-gf/now-wife at work while they were getting set up. This was at least close to "that era" I guess. It was after I'd graduated and before I'd heard of them but I would've been hooked immediately. Then, after I had been really into them for years, I couldn't make their last shows in Texas in 2017 or 2018 because I was at a work conference out of state and Scott Hutchison killed himself like 4 months later. -
2024 Transfer Thread - The Pedantic Circlejerk
campcrunk replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Top 5 finish! Put it on the wall! -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2025: Duck Around and Find Out
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
That WR class would be ideal. I'd take that in a heartbeat. I'd take 3/4 of it in a heartbeat. Moore, Lockett, and Johnson would be huge. Kelshaun Johnson seems like one of those kids who's going to be underrated by recruiting services because they don't bother to take a closer look but he appears to be absolutely electric and fast. Moore and Lockett would be great too. Obviously, the main reason is because they're such incredible talents. But the added "fuck you" to LSU and A&M would also be a nice bonus. I don't know much about Ffrench except that it looks like he's also really, really good but will be the hardest to pull off because of location -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2025: Duck Around and Find Out
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
I have to admit, I'm very curious about what it's like now. I'm sure the music isn't close any of those eras (not even the early 2000s when I was there and we got to see acts like the Murder City Devils, the Toadies, Metric, Polyphonic Spree, Reggie and the Full Effect, Belle & Sebastian, Against Me!, etc. pretty regularly for pretty cheap). And we made it a point see George Clinton annually plus Snoop, Weezer/Jimmy Eat World, the Foo Fighters, and the Smashing Pumpkins when they came (I think that list sounds right? I may have the years mixed up. I too was filled with drugs). My nearing college-age kids still wear shirts for those bands (plus folks like Nirvana, Pearl Jam, Radiohead, the National), so I'm sure there's at least some good music floating around here in Austin that the olds like me just aren't aware of. The massive uptick in corporatization sucks complete ass but it is interesting to me that there are still a lot of great local food options, including some that are still somehow affordable. Plus, while we're on the subject of drugs, any idiot with a credit card (physical or digital), an internet connection, and a mailing address (even a dorm based one) can get pretty much whatever they want shipped them overnight these days - and you don't even have to use the Dark Web because there are a LOT of "research chemicals" sitting in a legal gray zone that are every bit as fun and interesting as the ones they can actually arrest you for - and did I mention that that they're inexpensive? Sometimes very much so. Forget Delta 8, 9, whatever - put 65 mg of 4-HO-MET under your tongue or snort 175 mg of 2-Fluorodeschloroketamine some time and tell me you didn't have a completely (mostly) legal religious experience that was just as good as anything you ever got from the very illegal parent chemicals. Throw in some methallylescaline with that 4-HO-MET and... whoa. WAY better than any illegal candy flip you've ever had. There's a HUGE blind spot in federal law for this stuff and the lone attempt to actually sort of fix it was, in my professional legal opinion, very, very much unconstitutionally vague. And it wound up not even applying to the vast majority of these chemicals. TV and movies? ¡No problemo! Again, with an internet connection and a password from mom and dad or a buddy and you've got access to whatever you want. Sure, the actual cinema blows. But there are still occasional bright spots. And with respect to TV, there's probably more good shows out there right now, old and new, than even the laziest, most couch-attached college kid could actually sit and binge. Anyway, like I said, I think things here are still interesting and "weird" in ways that olds like me probably haven't anticipated. And in ways that are still very Austin and very UT. So if you'll excuse me, my Fluorexetamine appears to be wearing off and now I'm confused and possibly lost. -
2024 Transfer Thread - The Pedantic Circlejerk
campcrunk replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
I should have mentioned this as a bright spot a well. If Flood couldn't get anything out of this kid during the short time he coached him, imagine how poorly he would've "developed" under Herb Hand (just typing that name makes me simultaneously nauseous and violently ragey). If Tommy had come here and busted (more like "when he came here and busted"), it would just be more of the same old "SEEEEE, Y'ALL!!1 YOO TEE/TEE YOO CAIN'T DEEVELOP NO FAHV STARRS" from A&M, OU, and every one of our new conference "friends." ESPN would probably run with it too. Those chuckleheads just don't understand for even one second that development under Mack, Charlie, and Herman has nothing to do with development under Sark - which is a MASSIVE improvement from anything we've seen since... I don't even know. Maybe Tomey (RIP) and Robinson (also RIP)? Even if the vast, vast majority of those douchebags didn't completely lack the critical thinking skills to see the very obvious difference, they wouldn't give a flying fuck because they also tend to lack intellectual ethics and honesty. So forgive me if I don't post "fuck the Brocks" a whole bunch because it's clear to me they did us a huge favor by not coming here. All that said, fuck the Brocks. -
2024 Transfer Thread - The Pedantic Circlejerk
campcrunk replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
I'll be the one person to say something quasi-nice about this kid since, to the extent injuries actually played a role (and we've always known he had a bad shoulder), I wouldn't feel good about just about anyone's career ending that way short of them being someone who hits/does things to women against their will, which is not the case here to my knowledge. So, on the plus side, losing him to Bama was a big deal in terms of getting Herman fired and he did us the service of not wasting a scholarship here. At least there's that, I guess -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2025: Duck Around and Find Out
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Do you maybe have a kid or nephew or something, named danger_snax? You're still too lucid to be him but I can see at a least little resemblance in style I did enjoy the post, though. Sounds like I showed up at UT few years too late -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2025: Duck Around and Find Out
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
I taught a couple of years in the Katy area before grad school and still know a few folks there. I don't want that kid or his mom (especially his mom) within 100 miles of our program. Let him go be Lane Kiffin's problem or something. Better yet, let him blow up A&M's locker room. Yet again. -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2025: Duck Around and Find Out
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
It's been said before but this is EXACTLY how you know we really weren't cheating when so many others (read: A&M, OU, Bama, UGA, LSU, etc.) were screaming "EVERYONE ELSE IS DOING IT TOO" as loud as they could at anyone who'd listen. Now that it's actually legal to pay these kids, our recruiting is simply out of hand - and it's still gathering steam. Like top 3-5 classes EVERY FUCKING YEAR type of steam. Our recruiting would have been like this each and every year since the mid-70s if "eVeRyOnE eLsE wAs DoInG iT tOo!!" The gap between the haves and have nots is only going to get bigger and bigger and bigger and it's good to be the biggest "have" around. Get all the ins you can with that uncle everyone has, bitches. It don't make a shit. Not anymore tldr: prepare you anus, rest of cfb -
Negative Recruiting Your Own School: The aggy Screenshot Megathread
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
If Klein's offense doesn't change significantly (and why would he do that? It's worked for him well so far), Weigman might not make it through Notre Dame. If I was a betting man, I'd put down a pretty decent sum that the third QB power call knocks him out for a substantial amount of time. -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2025: Duck Around and Find Out
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
With his speed, ability, and general insane athleticism, Mal Williams COULD have been in that group (maybe even all pro) if he'd played LB or SS to compensate for his alligator arms. What a waste of talent by a player insisting on a position he was jut not meant for. Far, far too many players in recent UT history that probably cost us wins by insisting on the wrong position. Probably Brennan Eagles too. Tyler freaking Owens also comes to mind. BIG TIME. Potentially awesome downhill, see ball, hit ball LB. NOT a safety. Thank god Overshown got the message. There are plenty others but I'm depressed enough already. -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2025: Duck Around and Find Out
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Acted like Lincoln Riley? -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2025: Duck Around and Find Out
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Watched Stewart's HUDL and... DAMN. Did anyone else ever wonder what a hybrid or Jaden Blue and Jonathan Brooks might look like? My only question: how are his hands? We've been REALLY lucky to have a bunch of HBs under Sark that catch like WRs (Bijan, Blue, Keilan, Baxter, Red (who actually was a receiver) and allegedly Gibson and Clark). As much as we seem to use passes to the HB to GREAT effect, I would think that it would almost be a necessity for us to recruit to players with fantastic hands for the position. I really don't see much of that in Stewart's film outside two relatively easy catches (one of which was admittedly on a deep throw). That said, far be it from me to complain about taking a RB with the ability to run tough and with elite patience, vision, and speed. So by all means, sign him up. He looks like a very clear take to me. -
2024 Transfer Thread - The Pedantic Circlejerk
campcrunk replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Dammit. I knew I should have gone with mantle. Stupid liberal arts degree -
2024 Transfer Thread - The Pedantic Circlejerk
campcrunk replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
More than a few of you should take copious notes on this response. This is correct way to react when you're clearly wrong or have been called out because of a bad take. I know that not a single one of you will pay any attention but maybe at least consider responding this next time instead of digging even deeper into whatever horrible hill you're dying on over and over again. I'm just fucking with you. Dig until you hit the earth's crust on whatever horrible hot take you've come up with this time. For example, I seem to recall a few "Keontay Ingram reminds me of Jamaal and Kelvontay Dixon looks like Ramonce" posts a few years back. Incredible stuff, really. Then, after you've been thoroughly chewed up, ridiculed, abused, and spit back out, keep heading further down through the magma. It's almost always much more entertaining that way Seriously though, big props to Harvdog for manning up on this one. -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2024: Bags Don't Beat Bankrolls
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Outstanding. No disrespect to McKinley or Reliford but I think this kid might be the best DL in Louisiana. He looks like he's got a Poona Ford type motor with a lot more size and the same kind of power to back it up. I'm certainly no scout and am wrong a LOT so I'm not going to be like 'wAtCh ThE tApE" or anything like that. I just think he looks like the real deal. -
Negative Recruiting Your Own School: The aggy Screenshot Megathread
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Only A&M could find Tom Herman and Charlie Strong genetically spliced into one guy and then hire him to coach their football team. I can't wait to see their version of "the Five Rules" and pee charts. -
Negative Recruiting Your Own School: The aggy Screenshot Megathread
campcrunk replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
There is no bottom floor in hell. People will just invent new and somehow worse ways to derail these threads.
Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business and Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Subscribe!... Donate!... Advertise... COOKIE MONSTER!