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Scheiss Meister

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by Scheiss Meister

  1. I had a neighbor who was an animal whisperer. Folks found baby animals of all sorts and brought to him to raise. He'd get them to maturity and set them free on his parent's farm, where they would live and gradually acclimate to being wild. He had a squirrel that refused to go out of his parent's house for whatever reason. I went over to visit one day and that damned squirrel jumped off of a door lintel onto the top of my head, digging in with those needle claws like I was a tree. Damn, that hurt. I swear some of the punctures went clean to the skull. And then he kneaded, like a cat. Squirrels are cute, but fuck having them as pets, or in the house.
  2. Sounds like she'd bitch if you gave her a golden shower.
  3. From beautiful (?!) Nastysota... FIGHT!!!
  4. Funny, I was just thinking about my most successful dusting to date, and it was totally unplanned. I don't remember what it was, but I ate something that gave me some extra rancid, large farts. Absolutely horrible farts, like something died. I was putting a load of clothes in the washer when the worst of the lot burst forth in all of its rancid glory. Our air handler for the HVAC is right next to the washer, and the AC was running. When I went into the living room my wife asked me if I smelled something. Why, yes. Yes I did. It was that awful fart, piped into the living room. I explained what happened to her, and she gave me El Ojo Malo as she went into our bedroom to escape the odor. Shortly I hear her cussing, and she comes back into the living room. I had very effectively dusted the entire house. We had to turn off the AC and open the windows.
  5. According to 2A absolutists, that's just the price of freedom. A price they are willing for others to pay. Sick fucking bastards.
  6. Bernie with the kill shot: "No, you're the thug." Mullin is a fucking moron.
  7. I admit that this thread is my main source for news on Ukraine. That being said, I haven't heard much of anything about Russian drone/missile attacks on civilians and infrastructure. Have they really slowed down, or are they pushed aside by the Israel/Hamas fighting? If they have really slowed that much, I hope that Ukraine has enough AA assets and is preparing for a massive swarm attack on energy and road infrastructure and government buildings, along with the usual terrorist attacks on civilians. "It's quiet out there. Too quiet."
  8. If the American Nazis used it, forget about it. I'll think of something else.
  9. How about a compound of aggy? Covers any size family.
  10. The knife sharpener and Thermoworks Smoke or Thermopen are appreciated if the recipient doesn't already have them. I got myself a Bug-a-salt a month ago, and my son and future son-in-law will each receive one for Christmas this year. With the knife sharpener, be very careful. It can remove a lot of steel very quickly. Practice on an old or cheap knife first. Once you get the hang of it, use it to sharpen your blades once a year and just hone them the rest of the time.
  11. If it is a major command post, there will be a lot of items that the IDF doesn't necessarily want Hamas to know for certain that they have yet. Radios and other comms, for instance. Try to listen in on their conversations and keep them guessing about how much IDF really has. But yes, I was expecting more, too.
  12. I have considered making up a bunch of blue hats with Make America Good Again on them, but I don't know about possible copyright problems, and I really don't want to copycat the assholes, even if it is to put them down.
  13. I was going to write something else, but I realized that it was skating on very thin ice. Suffice to say, I like your thinking.
  14. Keep in mind that these idiots thought that anything Trump posted on twatter was a formal presidential order. As my dad would say, they don't have any more sense than a chicken or a frog.
  15. If "The Deep State" existed and operated the way Republicans think it does, the country would be littered with the corpses of Trump and Republican acolytes who dared defy "The Deep State". Endless instances of cut brake lines, mysterious blowouts on dangerous curves, and falls from tall buildings, all only happening to right-wingers. Think of their fantasies of what the Clintons supposedly did, writ large. It is what they tell themselves to justify what they want to do if they gain control.
  16. Tuberville needs to go ahead and choke on a chicken bone. Get him out of our misery.
  17. I thought that a group of aggy was called a bumblefuck.
  18. All of the worker bees at every level of government contributes to our civilization and standard of life in some form. Roads must be maintained or our economy tanks. Parks are essential to protecting wilderness and outdoor recreation areas for everyone. Wildlife folks are essential to protecting fish and wildlife, both game and non-game. There are people working to ensure that we have clean air, water, and soil so that we don't have to live in each other's shit and garbage. Laws are enforced to protect these things plus everything that embodies "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness". The people who do these things, as has been pointed out, are humans, with human frailties and foibles, but the overwhelming majority do their honest best. I was once lectured at length by a libertarian relative who contends that all laws are unnecessary impediments to absolute personal freedom. In his world there should be no environmental laws, we should let the free market work out what level of pollution we all must accept. All roads would be toll ways to pay for their construction and maintenance, there would be no public education, no public utilities, no government at all, so that he could exercise his total freedom unconditionally, without any obligations to society. He ranted about me being on the government tit my whole career and that I had a cushy job funded by poor, put upon taxpayers. It was discouraging, but he's not why I did (recently retired) what I did, anyway. I did it for my kids and their future, and all of those who do appreciate the work being done on their behalf. I, too, was and am fairly compensated. My job did have some leisurely days, and I got a very nice vacation package. There were also long days and nights of work, and a lot of stress. I know that a lot of people are in similar situations in both the public and the private sector, so that doesn't make me special. I'm still proud of being a small part of something bigger than me that exists for a purpose other than just to move money from one account to another.
  19. Successful revolutions start from the top, not the bottom. The American Revolution happened because the landed, property owning class leaders sparked and led it, not Farmer Smith fresh from the fields. PFC Snuffy and Sgt. Rock will follow, but they won't organize and lead a coup. The Flynn brothers and others of their ilk in the officer ranks are the ones to keep an eye on. They are the leaders who will take the lower ranks astray.
  20. With his connection to Del Conte, would aggy really go after Patterson? The first bad game they would be screaming about a sip conspiracy to keep them down.
  21. The two happiest days of an aggy football fan's life are the day they pay an obscene amount to hire a new head coach and the day they pay even more to fire that coach.
  22. That's bullshit. Blinn has four juco national championship trophies in their trophy case. New aggy football motto: "aggy football - almost as accomplished as Blinn!" ETA - Maybe that's why aggy is so determined to absorb Blinn, to claim their titles, too.
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