I had a boss once who would go through the refrigerator at the wastewater plant and eat parts or all of people's lunches. Fucker was a retired developer with millions in the bank, which he would gladly tell you about, and he was stealing food from folks making just a bit over minimum wage. When I confronted him about it, he said that he was really hungry, and it was un-Christian of me to turn away a hungry man. I then explained to him that we had a container of phenalthaline in the lab, that it was the active ingredient in Ex-Lax, and that I knew how to bake it into brownies so that anyone who ate them would shit themselves half to death. The next day I had a large brownie in my lunch. When he opened up my lunch and saw the brownie, he looked at me like, "You wouldn't." I laughed and told him that there was only one way to find out. He put my lunch back in the fridge and didn't fuck with our lunches after that.
That Brookshire Bros brownie was really good.