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RDCanecutter

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by RDCanecutter

  1. Aww hell. I had just started enjoying the East Coast trucker accents in NPR interviews. GIMME ONE CHIPPED BEEF.
  2. I got my walk on today. Plan was to hit a Hobby Lobby and walk every aisle N-S and E-W, make the map look like a giant crossword puzzle. Instead, the satellites twerked my location so it looks like I noodled around half the store, snuck out back to play in the creek, vibrated through the wall to the gym next door, then ran around screaming all over the front parking lot. Hexes is hexes.
  3. That's just the Deep State y'all.
  4. "When you marry your mistress, you create a job vacancy," -- Half-French Englishman James Goldsmith (1933-97)
  5. It'll be like Apocalypse Now, as we search for you on Pirates of the Caribbean. Somebody will get off the boat and run into an animatronic tiger. Mr. Phlegm will be Kurtz, you will be the jabbering hippy sidekick.
  6. Are you gonna catch a ride home, or just turn around and walk back?
  7. Just the medical opinion of an Art major, but if they caught it early, why not try the laser, and if it doesn't work, go with more traditional treatments? He sounds healthy enough to bear up under various drugs and their glorious side effects. Sounds like he's pretty tough. Go kill that cancer!
  8. Quick, pull her back up out of the Chick-fil-A fart zone.
  9. Sitting down in their coal mines the week before the game plotting all that stuff out with that Secret Sign Language like they do. Like wizards casting spells. I'm scared of em.
  10. You think those guys don't cheat just because they're deaf?
  11. Jane Curtin got em following the rules.
  12. We could go live in those empty Mexican houses. They'd cost less. Unless you move to the town right after some fucking "Fair Trade" philosopher who refused to bargain.
  13. Just so y'all know, when both guys say "Donald," they tend to slur it like the Scottish Gaelic pronunciation. Happens more often when they follow it with "Trump." "Domhnall Trump..." Gentlemen, we have been infiltrated by Jacobites.
  14. Pretty damn boring so far.
  15. MAGA Grandbabies wondering why they can't have nice things.
  16. Ain't nothin but a thang. If I keep walking steady, the streak will reappear.
  17. They believe it, they believe it, they believe it. They believe it even more if they know you don't believe it.
  18. 0:47 several landwhales wearing tents for shirts appear, walking up the path behind her, quite improbably under their own power and making good speed, I am reminded of the charging hippo. Also, is that supposed to be some famous building behind her? I am sure I have no idea as I do not frequent land-locked states where they produce this sort of ying-yang whiny music.
  19. I lost my streak Sunday. We were at a large outdoor mall that was prime check-in territory as my wife hiked around earning Noise Coins for the household, but my tiny breakfast got me through tent and table set-up, then it was blood-sugar-dive collapse-in-chair until I was given a chicken sandwich and got my groove back. But then the people had shown up, and I extroverted enough of em into visiting my booth so I could break even. My friend in a "better" part of the mall grossed $3, and the person wanted to pay with a card. Breaking even did not seem so bad after that. That mall was a rocky place where our art could find no purchase. About the streak, yeah I could have recovered it, but all I care about is the map, not the coins. So I guess I should have paid some coins to save the streak. I ain't no monument to rational thought. The other day I took a tunnel under a street, and the app recorded it accurately. As opposed to when I walk under a parking deck, and it goes crazy.
  20. "Well now son, that's just how cagey President Trump is at slippin and slidin around the Demoncrat Sheeple hordes, got em believin he accepts their lies. Hell, all they's doin by thinkin he lost is settin him up for a free third term. [wink] [nod]"
  21. Try leading her less.
  22. Some meat products, you just close your eyes and you can hear the shling of a flathead shovel on wet concrete.
  23. You can't prove the hoodlum part, Rusty.
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