Yeah, and I can tell you a few things about my marriage specifically. #1. We went through 12 long years, most of which my now-husband was not allowed to work because we weren't allowed to get married, so economically, getting married was fucking huge from us. Once he was allowed to work as well, suddenly we could plan for the future, we could put aside money for retirement, we could think about a life with vacations and potentially starting a business, and all the other things that were just not a possibility before the laws were changed.
It wasn't all bad before hand though. I was a lower level project manager for a computer company making jack shit when we got together, and him not being able to work forced me to actually apply myself and grow my career, because I got tired of wondering monthly whether we were going to be able to pay all of our bills if we decided to go out for dinner once a month. He also wound up with 2 American degrees, because the only way we could keep him here was to put him in school.
And it hasn't been all good since we got married either. We're still paying for those 2 American degrees and will be for awhile.
All in all though, the financial stability of not having to worry that missing a paycheck would be a catastrophe that would be difficult to overcome, the emotional stability we have because we can make our own choices about our lives now, the comfort that we take in knowing that if something happened to one of us, the other could make decisions without having to carry around lawyer drafted paperwork everywhere we go, those things have been invaluable.
I'm going to pretend like you are being honest in your question and the inflammatory parts are just your immature attempt to appear to be cool....
There are hundreds and hundreds of data points that quantify the marked improvements in quality of life. I have lived with those marked improvements daily since the Windsor decision.
In my specific case:
1. Financial security - being allowed to be a 2 income household means we aren't living paycheck to paycheck
2. Emotional security - the very fact we no longer have carry around powers of attorney so that we could go wave them in the face of some hospital administrator if one of us was incapacitated and hospitalized has been bigger than you'd think. Imagine going on vacation and an emergency happens and the hospital wouldn't let you see your loved one because of no defined legal arrangement. That happened routinely before Windsor and Obergefell. That meant that gay couples had to carry paperwork with them every time they left town just in case, or risk not being able to make decisions about their significant other.
3. Mental stability - we no longer have to spend all of our days obsessing over the ins and outs of what could happen because of the whims of elected officials who are feeling some heat from their right flank, and therefore veer off to attack us. The amount of brain power we expended just worrying about that can now be put to better use, and I can tell you it's a loss less taxing to support other groups in the same boat and to work with them to get out of that attack cycle than it is to be the person that is getting attacked directly.
I'm sure I could go on and on, but I think I've probably already given you more than you actually cared to read so I'll leave it here for now.
To sum up, I will always be thankful for Edie Windsor and Jim Obergefell for their willingness to walk the paths they walked so the rest of us would be able to live a life much closer to free than most of us ever dreamed would be possible.
I also won't forget you oldtimes that go back to the Hornfans days, because while most of you were on the Republican side of the fence back then on this issue, you were almost all willing to listen to the arguments and to rethink your conclusions. Y'all being willing to entertain the arguments made me a better person, helped me articulate what I wanted in a clearer way, which paid dividends in my life well beyond this message board. I'll always have a soft spot in my heart for you group of assholes, so thank you too.