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hookemATL

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Everything posted by hookemATL

  1. Trying to get fired. Then a year off as commentator/watermelon seed spitting competition contestant. Then swoop in to take Deboer’s spot after the gumps go full pitchfork mode.
  2. Everyone should follow the tenets of Pre-anti-interconnectednessism, a religion I created while masturbating and doing really strong salvia mixed with weed. 1. Don’t be such a cunt all the time 2. Be nice to animals and children 3. Put your cart away at the grocery store mortal sins include putting beans in chili, saying anything critical of Willie Nelson, and using Oxford commas oh fuck
  3. Shiner and Stella are more qualified to govern than this deranged fuckface. I hope she gets the Ramsey Bolton treatment.
  4. It’s the mental illness, you see. not really. He’s just another in the cacophony of cunts that actively work to make this website worse. Changing usernames back and forth is just the last card that is played before the cycle is repeated (see derka, tobacco animal douche, etc.) It would be amusing if it wasn’t so pathetic
  5. Please leave your comment in the suggestion box and management will get to it in turn. Thank you for your contributions to the surly community. Sincerely, Mgmt
  6. Instead of fog machine for the intro, they can just blast crystalline silica dust in honor of all the dead/dying/destroyed lungs of coal miners. “Take me hommmmmeeee, country **hack cough hack spit hack cough hack** roadssssssss”
  7. Tim Brando is what happens when you anthropomorphize rectal cancer.
  8. Goddammit troph, charge ya muhfuckin’ phone.
  9. Didn’t he change his username bc it became synonymous with being a racist cunt? That’s the move of a weak minded pussy, which many racists happen to be.
  10. leftover meatloaf sandwich > leftover thxgiving turkey sandwich. Fight me.
  11. It’s just a matter of time before they are laid low by another sexual assault scandal or something of that sort. Franklin is a humongous piece of shit. A perfect fit for one of cfb’s biggest cesspools/shitholes.
  12. Our Billy goat growing up had 12” balls and he smelled like shit and he head butted you every chance he got. Total fucking asshole that had to be hogtied so we could worm the herd and trim hooves. despite this I somehow resisted the urge to commit a mafia style hit on this goat (we’ll call him Emilio to maintain privacy). Only psychopaths commit this level of cruelty toward animals. I wish her nothing but misery.
  13. Goddamn I love this dog. Look at her eyes and how much she clearly trusts and loves you. THAT is why dogs are everything.
  14. Congrats to Byron! Not a bad place to play pro football.
  15. Sounds like a recipe for fun (and vomit and diarrhea).
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