I tried AA for the first time the year I turned 30. I hadn't lost nearly enough for it to stick. I didn't have desperation; I was way too willing to take it a la carte. I figured now that AA finally had somebody really smart doing its program, that person could sort of audit the thing and pick out the most important parts and just do those, to maximize efficiency and avoid uncomfortable stuff.
yeah that didn't work
Meetings are important but being in and around the meeting is equally important. If you're just a face that's there from 11:59 til 1:01, you're not really in the herd. It might seem hard to strike up conversations, God knows I think so, but a simple "I liked what you shared" after a meeting is enough to start forging the kind of simple friendships that make the meetings comfortable and even enjoyable.
You will hear different things about sharing. Some people think newcomers should shut the fuck up and listen. That's partly true. I guess my advice would be, share often early on just so people know who you are and what you're going through. All your share has to be is how you're feeling that day. It doesn't have to illuminate anything about the program for anyone else, it doesn't have to generate applause or laughter or get you elected VP of AA because of its amazing insight. It took me a long time to learn that. Just sharing "I'm new, this kind of sucks" lets people know you're approachable.