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Tex Long

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6087 Surly 1%

About Tex Long

  • Birthday 04/04/1943

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  1. I'd bet the number of Surlys who, if their wives brought that outfit to them, would put that shit on and parade in public would be vanishingly small. I suspect it wouldn't even matter if she was super hot and a monster in the sack. Maybe the turndown would be more polite than mine would be, but still... no-man-shit-no-man.gif
  2. Tearjerker Strong, damn. Be fair, though... when you run into a guy who can't remember his #1 guy's name, or his own zip code, seems like you might want to start looking for a replacement, pronto. My favorite zip code story concerns the fella who moved to Pasadena and came up with a quick mnemonic to remember his new zip code. His kid asked what it was, and he replied "Nine-one? Oh, one-one" in a pleased manner. Kid said "Fuck, dad, it's nine, ten, eleven!"
  3. Booger Hill might be a decent opening act for Sacred Asswater.
  4. Perplexing play calls Lacking in execution Great defense wasted An Offensive Head Coach, named Sark, Called his plays in what seemed like the Dark. His players, confused, and improperly used, Felt their coaches had all jumped the shark.
  5. Sacred Asswater need to headline ACL ASAP. Prolly six mandolins and a theremin.
  6. It seems rather short-sighted to insist a specific player somehow start being able to execute your plans. There would seem to be two better alternatives: (1) replace the player with one who can execute your plan; (2) change your plan to one that your player can actually execute. And/or "why not both?"
  7. Truth be told, Jordon wouldn't be in my wheelhouse if I were sixty years younger. It's not just looks, but there's a lot to not like... just my opinion. Of course, I also admit to being not merely racist, but absolutely tribalist, when it comes to female companionship... the three great loves of my life were (and are) Danish, Scottish, and Norwegian.
  8. I'm kind of hoping for a quick call to Pedo State, to let them know we'd waive whatever buyout is in the contract.
  9. Jordon's not remotely in my wheelhouse. Sally... well, there's something to be said for a platter of fresh chocolate chip cookies.
  10. Going back to Year 1 of Sark, seeing him lose six games in a row, building for the future instead of winning this game, right here, right now... took me - and apparently many others - three years to really warm up to him, and here we go again. I don't think I'll be surprised if we manage to lose three or four of the last five games. We shouldn't, we all hope we don't, we all hope our HC can get up the OC's ass and get some lipstick on this pig.
  11. All threads are susceptible to "Arch&OL suck" and "there was that time" posts.
  12. Florida-Kentucky level OC'ing would make it hard to win any of these last five regular season games.
  13. I'm surprised at the ref-firing, but that Auburn-UGa game was as blatant as anything we've ever seen, including the Baylor Teaff farewell and the Charlie Hip-check game. I can't imagine anything that would make shit so obvious, other than a visit from Lefty and Fingers relaying an unrefusable offer from Da Boss. Really, only halfway kidding - it's gonna take some serious fear for you to throw away whatever reputation you still have.
  14. Maybe. Are there any dark glasses?
  15. I love football. Watching a game that's relatively evenly matched is the best. It's so enjoyable to see guys making athletic plays... fast, strong, great catches, great throws, great kicks. It doesn't even matter if I don't care who wins - in fact it's often even better, because I can appreciate plays both ways. Gotta love it. Hook'em
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