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Tex Long

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Everything posted by Tex Long

  1. Klondike. Peg. All day, every day. Serial or parallel.
  2. Tex Long

    Bert!

    It would have been easier if he'd have just gone ahead and changed his name to Aubern.
  3. Not sure about the lawfare, but I had a German guy working for me in Houston, with all proper paperwork - green card or whatever it was. He took some classes at Rice, and I don't recall any "student visa" issues. It seems reasonable to think some sort of a similar paperwork workaround would be possible for athletes.
  4. Tex Long

    Bert!

    Y'all doing a great job here, complaining about the kicking game instead of the Red Zone play calling and execution. Two years in a row we get to the semi-final, come down to first and goal needing a TD to win or at least tie, and wind up 0 for 8 and minus 7 points... dammit, if only our kicker wasn't shit. I'll be interested to see if Auburn can figure out what went wrong, and maybe get his first two seasons' accuracy back.
  5. Not necessarily better, but more coverage: "I can lick my eyebrows."
  6. While screwing one night, Bobby Luck In his ears got his wife's nipples stuck. With his thumb up her bum He could hear himself cum, Thus inventing the Telephone Fuck.
  7. Genetics looks good, performance looks good. I think Sark & Staff got another hit, here. But other than the V, he doesn't really challenge Parker Livingstone for Whitest Name... prolly close to Carrington Byndom, though.
  8. It seems like he might've had a bad spring. too.
  9. I haven't looked at all 7,588 rules, and you're prolly right, but I think it's not a foul to step on your own player but not allowed to be "launched" by that player. It would be pretty tough to call a foul in a "tush-push" type of crowd, where it appears to be fine for the QB or RB to more or less leap on top of his OL guys and be pushed/carried for the score.
  10. It's amazing how many delicious fruits are rose family... apples, peaches, pears, apricots, cherries, and most of the berries. Roses, if you take the buds after the flowers get pollinated and close up, those rose hips are super high in vitamin C.
  11. I've always wanted to see a goal line play where a big guy or two has some padding on his back, and the RB takes the handoff and takes about two steps up the big guys' backs and launches like he was coming off a two meter board. I think it was Arkysaw who had a guy they used like that, called him the "High Diver" or some such - he was damned tough to stop. I also recall a game, I think it was 0U, where Shipley took a short snap on a fake punt and broad/high-jumped face-first about six yards for a 1st down. Oh, yeah... RIP Pirate.
  12. Injured player must leave the field and may not return until change of possession occurs. Player requring assistance from sideline shall not return to the field until cleared by NCAA Game Physician. If player requires sideline assistance or exceeds normal play-clock time, the injured team may be penalized for Delay of Game or at its option use a time out if available. Delay penalty will be charged at a rate of five yards per minute of stoppage. If injured team is not in possession the ball, the team on offence will have the full 25-seconds of play-clock available and neither team may substitute once the ball is ready for play. If any player leaves the field due to injury a second time, the player may not return to the field for the balance of the game. The "half-the-distance" rule shall not be in effect, and if the Delay of Game penalty crosses a goal line, the result will be either a safety or a touchdown, depending on defensive or offemsive possession. I think this substantially what I offered back after the No A/C, Two Dozen Cramps game with LSU a few years back.
  13. Renaming the stadium to POP or HOP seems like a fine idea... Palace of Prime or House of Prime ... at AFLAC Field
  14. On the bright side, they can be tied. Win-win.
  15. Arch's plays were called by Sark, addressing the backup QB. I doubt we can read much into the choices for the forthcoming season, depending on our QB2's skill set compared to Arch/QB1. On the other hand, I'ma add "more happier" to my Glossary of Surlyisms.
  16. Technically, extra point conversion is an offensive play, so...
  17. Any TE who looks at Helm's hi-lites should want to have a chance to catch passes from Arch,
  18. Well said. I think this nails it. Of course, it could be considerd as "damning with faint praise".
  19. No strong regrets, but similar story. Several years back, visit to Doc for general checkup. Doc does his thing, leaves me with PA, who is an absolutely gorgeous 35-40 year-old woman. She does a couple more things, then says "Let's just check your prostate." I say, "Uhhhhh, okay... if it's mutual." She says "Mutual? Meaning what?" I say "Well, if you're going to stick your finger up my butt, I ought to get to stick my finger up yours, no?" She laughs, responds with "Oh, I wasn't going to use my bare finger!" I said, "Neither was I." Still waiting for that check...
  20. It has to do with the same reasons men can get dressed and headed out the door in a few minutes, while women need at least 45 minutes, even if it's just for a trip through the pharmacy drive-thru. Basically, it's about the concept of "outfits". A man is almost never concerned with specific colors, any combination is perfectly good as long as (1) it's not soaking wet, (2) it has no (overly) large holes, and (3) it doesn't smell (particularly) bad.
  21. Back when the earliest "always on" modems hit the 'net - before the 'net became the web - I wrote a little piece of software that would run a chunk of text through a thesaurus and save the results. One of the first bits I tried, before it got too boring, came back with "I vow fealty to the symbol of the Bonded Modalities of America..." I'm pretty sure that code was swiped by certain government agencies and has been heavily involved in speech-writing for these many years.
  22. Gonna need to fix that face-width-to-horns ratio. Does she have her personal redesign posted? ... maybe add some bevels in there somewhere...
  23. Yeah, something in the red zone needs to get more than just "focus".
  24. How many lesbians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. Two to screw in the light bulb, and one to give you a blowjob while you watch the first two screwing.
  25. This is the point, of course. Errybody seriously doubts it happens... but it would help take some of the ridiculous levels of attention pressure raining down on Arch's head.
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