Alabama 21
Texas 20
Alabama 273 yards
Bama’s offense can’t get ahead of the sticks all night, stinks up Bryant Denny. Both defenses play balls out. Milroe bails and scrambles 15 times, to little effect. Saban refuses to sub any backup QB for Milroe. Ewers flings 14 long passes, some connect. Sark pulls a hamstring jumping up from a squat, refuses to play subs.
Auburn (spit on ground) and Reichert fill the air with field goal attempts, some connect.
With 1:00 left, up 20-16, Horns are inside their own 5, facing 4th and 13, call time.
Horns punter runs around in the end zone using many of Bama’s precious remaining seconds, giving the safety (Sarks secret plan). Free kick ends up with Bama on its own 30, 50 seconds left in the game. Texas 20, Bama 18. Many fans, remembering grade school arithmetic, become excited.
Three downs net negative 10. On 4th and 20 with 22 seconds left, Milroe scrambles to the Horns 40 but forgets to call time. Saban, steam shooting out of mouth, ears, eyes and nostrils, remembers, and calls time with 2 seconds left.
Reichert nails one from 57.
Big Al fondles the anal cleft of the best looking chaps girl, says later, “You could fit a Bartlett pear up in there! I’m transferring to Austin!”
With the win, Bama trails Texas all time, 7-3-1. Maybe I’ll live long enough to see the series even.
P.S.
Texas meets Bama again in this year’s playoff. In all of our dreams.