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Everything posted by Bama Llama
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1. No Country For Old Men. Llewellyn Moss, wounded in the obliques I guess, having jumped out a second floor hotel window in El Paso, is limping with his jumbo attache case full of cash down a dark street trying to get away from Anton Chigur, when an kind older man in a pickup truck gives him a ride. Moss gets in and is just settling in his seat when one of Chigur’s shotgun slugs blasts through the truck back window and takes off half the old man’s head, the truck stalls off to one side, and poor wounded Moss is back on the street. There is no fucking way Chigur could have been close enough to that truck to have so accurately placed that shot. 2. Fargo. Gaear Grimsrud (Buscemi’s character Carl Showalter’s chain smoking crime partner played by Peter Stormare) stone cold murdered the state trooper, the young innocent bypassing couple, Jerry Lundegaard’s wife, and Showalter, in a wood chipper, no less. It’s very Coenesque but still a moral plot hole for him to end up a ward of the state rather that shot between the eyes by Sheriff Margie (she’s such a great lady).
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I was WAY too young when I watched that movie.
Bama Llama replied to Parliament's topic in Movies and TV
The Monster That Challenged the World (1957) My demented 9-year old girl cousin presented me with what I perceived as a fantastic gift on my fifth birthday: she treated me to a free double feature air conditioned matinee, with free orange soda over crushed movie ice! The only catch (or so my naive young brain thought at the time) was that we had to walk and the theater was ten blocks away and it was the middle of August in Tuscaloosa, Alabama. My mother had thoughtfully replaced last year’s rotten sneakers with snow white Keds still new in the box. I laced them up and off we went. I wouldn’t allow two little kids to walk anywhere in Tuscaloosa today, much less ten blocks to the movies. Before we had gone four blocks, I was sweating and my new shoes were cutting into my ankles. By the time we got there the blisters were serious and killing my sockless feet. Why no socks? Five-year old. Glorious frigid air, a rarity in the fifties, welcomed us into the Druid Theater. We loaded up on orange drinks, in big wax cups with crushed ice, buttered popcorn, Goobers and Milk Duds. Then we entered the cool, dark sanctuary and settled into our seats. That was when I discovered this wasn’t a feel good film about cowboys or pirates or Disney characters. Ohhh, but no, it was a post-bomb, atomic nightmare, scare the shit out of your cousin who yesterday was four fucking years old, giant centipede monster HORROR MOVIE! I watched at most 10% of that shit peeking through my fingers until st last it was over but not before I saw the monster pick a lab assistant up with his giant pincers, hold him ten feet up gyrating snd screaming in the air and pop his skull like a big pink grape and not before I saw the aftermath of the monster’s rampage through the lab, where all the innocent fuzzy rabbits and guinea pigs were slaughtered, guts threaded over broken beakers and busted microscopes, with monster glop and goo jizzed all over everything. I asked if we could wrap it up and head back home but my cousin scolded, “Nooooo! Thst was only the first movie! I paid for a double feature and you’re going to watch. Every. Minute of both movies!” I soon sensed something I wouldn’t know the name of for many years - sadism. Feature two was “The Vampire.” Only it wasn’t a Bela Lugosi Stoker vampire. It was a freindly neighborhood family doctor whose office looked exactly like the repurposed suburban home MY doctor practiced in and I had to visit from time to time. THIS doctor was bitten by a bat and before long his patients were being sucked dry and their drained husks chucked into the basement furnace. I don’t remember walking home. I only knoe I slept in my parents’ bedroom that night snd several nights thereafter. My father had a “talk” with his older sister, my cousin’s mother. Seems neither oc my parents had any idea where my cousin was taking me that day. i never trusted that bitch again. Years later she had to spend the afternoon of her wedding day mopping up the blood and guts of her mother’s pet spider monkey, which her and her husband’s white German shepherds had opened a door in her mother’s home to get. Served her right. -
2024 Presidential Election Thread - Let's keep the party going.
Bama Llama replied to bolverk's topic in Cloak Room
Read this when you have 15 minutes. It will make you sober, make you vomit or make you drive to a battleground state and go door to door for Harris and Walz. https://www.nytimes.com/2024/10/20/us/politics/trump-scandals.html?smid=nytcore-ios-share&referringSource=articleShare&tgrp=ctr&pvid=E65CE658-FDE0-4E8E-BD5F-7F72157E46BB This immoral, arrogant, dishonest stack of smegma must be deposited in the dustbin of history where he belongs. -
Game Week Thread Game Week 2024, Week 8, Texas @ Vandy
Bama Llama replied to Wulaw Horn's topic in Football
Spy Pavia from down one and double his NMST buddy, that big ass tight end. And beware the shovel pass. Go gorth, sin no more, have a blast! Hook ‘em. -
Game Week Thread Game week 2024, week 7 Georgia @ Texas
Bama Llama replied to Wulaw Horn's topic in Football
Man, are you some kind of screenwriter poet?! I’m an Alabama fan first and foremost and part of me dies when we lose but I’m fundamentally a college football fan. The only time I set foot in what is now DKR the man himself was pacing the sidelines and I was cheering on the mighty defeated Rice Owls. Reading your fine post I kept waiting for strings, brass and a full chorus to come in with The Eyes. A few weeks ago I was fretting over some of the same bullshit some posters above are throwing out there. We had UGA 21-0 before they knew what hit them. Justsit back or stand up or do whatever you do and fuckin LET THIS BEAUTIFUL GAME WASH OVER YOU, GUYS. Hook ‘em! -
And enjoys his time in gen pop horsing around with El Diablo, Big Worm and the guys. Asshole.
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Game Week Thread Game week 2024, week 7 Georgia @ Texas
Bama Llama replied to Wulaw Horn's topic in Football
There’s nothing wrong with the S-E-C chant if the time is right. I can’t claim to be one that started it but I believe I was there when it was born. It grew out of being force fed Miami’s bullshit hype for a few years and the whole Geno Torreta Heisman bandwagon in 1992. Seems like there were about seven or eight minutes left in the Sugar Bowl and Bama fans were starting to realize it was going to happen. Not only were we winning the title but we had pantsed the invincible Caines in the process. We received literally one (1) vote in the AP poll all year, up to and including that week. An Arizona writer in Tucson I think named Corky Frost started voting us #1 in October and continued it every week right through to the final poll, when it was unanimous. He was invited to be grand marshal of the parade. The chant started up in some remote psrt of the Superdome and it jusr caught on and kept building until it was a stomping, standing, yelling Victorygasm. It didn’t hurt that Miami and Ericson had whipped our asses three years before and we were reminded of it constantly in the runup to the 92 game. Sports Illustrated was the worst front runner Caines suck off douche. I believe the chant has a time and a place. That year, it fit. This year, assuming you don’t trip on your foreskins in Nashville or aggyland, when Texas deflowers some unlucky team in the Mercedes Dome in Atlanta, it would be apropos as well to haul out the chant. Year One SEC Champs - check✅ -
Game Week Thread Game week 2024, week 7 Georgia @ Texas
Bama Llama replied to Wulaw Horn's topic in Football
Sixties SEC Lore Follows. Oh, the hazardous hubris of being ranked #1. In early September of 1965, my parents and I went to the Bama-Georgia game in Athens. I was 14 so my father drove the Oldsmobile (apt name). On the road I devoured the new SI college football big preseason issue with “Bama’s #1” on the cover. I was in adolescent Alabama fan heaven feeling an invincible vibe like the ones above in this thread. Then this shit happened. My Surly comrades, you must beware the devious devil dogs! This Saturday late in fourth quarter when the Horns are ahead by seven, watch out for this shit, which I saw happen right in front of me. Motherfucking guy was DOWN! And once and for all the term is “hook and lateral” and not “hook and ladder.” Jesus. Guy was not called down. Pitch man scored. UGA went for 2 and made it. It was a long, sad trip back to Tuscaloosa. We didn’t lose sgsin in 1965, ended up playing Nebraska in the Orange Bowl, beat them, ended up #1 anyway. Never give up, Joe! Hook ‘em but put a good sure tackler on the defensive right to clock that pitch man. -
Prediction thread Week 7, 2024- Georgia at Texas
Bama Llama replied to Wulaw Horn's topic in Football
40-24 Horns <400 total Georgia yards -
And . . . there’s the tanned, lithe & freaky UF coed nubility local color Joey Freshwater lure factor. The Old South pouty but frisky Scarlett O’Hara gauntlet of Oxford Belles must be growing tiresome by now.
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Official "Fuck this stupid ass-commercial" thread
Bama Llama replied to Prepuce of Doom's topic in Movies and TV
I am officially sick to fucking death of the locker room cheese wheel coach commercials. Never liked fuckin Cheez-Its anyway. I’m usually sweating out a game trying to conjure up a post Saban win for Bama and here cones coach Cheeze-Its is in my face yelling at fucking wheels of cheese in football helmets. What a waste of lit fiber optic lines. And I fuckin hate that shade of orange. -
FINAL 2024 CFB polls/rankings - Texas #3/ #4 /#3 (CFP/AP/Coaches)
Bama Llama replied to TKthunder2's topic in Football
I’ll tell you what, Diego Pavia can play quarterback. The Vandy defense won’t stand up vs the Texasrunning game, much less Sark’s schemes and wizardry but Vandy is a better team, and a better coached team right now than several SEC teams and AP top 25 teams. I’ll be glad to eat this post after the Horns win in Nashville by 24 or more. First, neuter them Dawgs and their coach poaching coach. These are some Vegas line beating Horns! My guys are 85% out of it but have a prayer if there’s a rspid and major turnaround. -
For you, sir, the oft imitated but never duplicated Verbiage Extraordinaire Surly Blue Max Octobre Croix du Guerre! ~~~##^*^##~~~ ====>xx☠️🎃☠️xx<==== ~~~##^*^##~~~
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I guess his jibe didn’t jive with my gibe. Roll Tide anyway. Remember chicken wire and crepe paper? Lo, the gibbous moon doth rise. Thank for teaching me something new.
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Nope. That count was for the three I attended in person and the fourth one was for 1930. the season my father played in. I still respect your rich tapestry of Surly jibes.
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No offense taken. I’m perfectly happy to claim these few, including one which (gasp!) predated the AP poll era. 1. 1961 - Undefeated Bama beat Arkansas in the Sugar Bowl 2. 1992 - Undefeated Bama beat Miami in the Sugar Bowl 3. 2010 - Undefeated Bama beat Texas in the Rose Bowl. What if Colt hadn’t been injured? What if Colt had handed off instead of running into the teeth of that defense? What if Squints, instead of being strip sacked, had hit Shipley for 50 yards and Texas kicked a tying field goal? Who the fuck knows? 4. 1930 - Undefeated Bama beat Washington State in the Rose Bowl. That one is special because my father played end (bogh esys) on that team. Running full speed covering a punt in Rose Bowl practice in Tuscaloosa, he was clipped smack on the left knee and couldn’t play in the Rose Bowl. That knee would be scoped today without a second thought and he’d be fine in a few weeks. But not in those days. The University refused to allow him to make the trip (ASSHOLES!). He never gave them a farthing for the rest of his 82 years but he did take me to a hell of a lot of games, including three Sugar Bowls. Four is plenty enough for me. The games in between are pretty fucking good, too. Good Luck, Horns. We’re a couple of years away, I think.
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In 1969, Vandy beat Bama 14-10 with Mack’s brother Watson Brown at qb. That was a 6-5 Bryant team. In 1970 we went 6-6 with an extra regular season game. Fair weather spoiled fans (assholes) were avoiding Bryant in restaurants. Bryant met with DKR in the offseason, installed the wishbone and went ten years straight averaging 10 or more wins and won or shared the 1978 and 1979 NCs. Bama was in the picture for a handful of championships between 1970-1980. 1973 NC was awarded to us by UPI but I don’t know anyone who counts that one. We choked the 1973 Sugar Bowl to ND 24-23 in a helluva game in which Tom Clements late in the game threw the pass of a lifetime on 3rd and long out of his own end zone do a big slow bohunk tight end, Robin Weber, who had never been targeted but a couple of times. He was wide open and pulled it in. Game over. Ara had them balls. You never know what’s coming around the corner. I like DeBoer and think he’ll be fine. If we lose Willie and a few truckloads full of t shirt fans, good riddance. Roll Tide and Hook ‘em. Honestly. I think this Bama team is not that bad but also not through losing games. C’est la vie. Try like hell to win each play and don’t get bogged down in the bullshit between games.
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Crimson Tide (#1 lolol) @ Commodores on SEC Network
Bama Llama replied to blacklab's topic in Football
Bear’s first coaching job was as an assistant at Vandy. As Bama’s coach, he lost once to Vandy, in 1969 in Nashville, 14-10, part of a shitty 6-5 season. Spraking of 69, that ballsy 4th and 1 killer call and dagger TD reminded me of 1969 - Texas down to Arkansas in Little Rock, title on the line, 4th and 1 late in the game. Hogs stack the line of scrimmage and James Street hides the ball on a fake dive play to the fullback, then throws a perfect strike to a receiver you guys know the name of. Texas wins! Hey coack! Nixon’s on the phone for you in the dressing room. Horns are national champions. All that shit went through my old head when Pavia threw that TD vs my Bama on 4th and 1. -
Crimson Tide (#1 lolol) @ Commodores on SEC Network
Bama Llama replied to blacklab's topic in Football
Puck and girt, pluck ang grit, fuck and shit, just put it in the old Crimson Flamethrower and fire away. Anything but that walking dead shit we ran put there against Vanderbilt. Before October 19th, the Tennesee Department of Environmental Management will likely file for a permanent injunction against Alabama playing football in that state, now with a second river in two years polluted with post-Bama celebrations’ dismembered goal posts. -
Crimson Tide (#1 lolol) @ Commodores on SEC Network
Bama Llama replied to blacklab's topic in Football
I'm no bitch. I'm taking the loss, as painful as it is. If I had a hat, I'd tip it to Vandy, with a 17th century flourish, their coaches, players, students, band, fans, all. We are 4-1, headed God knows where. AS the old school boys used to preach, "Back to fundamentals!" Eye discipline, poise, intensity, focus, no out of bounds shit, no classless kicking the ball as the better team take a knee shit, no throwing into coverage on the first fucking play of the game shit, no failure to get a single three and out shit. Fuck, guys, try to put together two consecutive plays in which we don't fuck up! Last year I watched with Mr. Burns-rubbing-his-hands-together-murmuring-"Excellent!" glee as Diego Pavia and NM St humiliated Alldumb in Possum Hair Stadium. Karma's the bitch to all gloaters. Then, in the off season doldrums, I saw where Pavia had transferred to Vandy. Hmmm, good for Vandy, said I. Then I checked our schedule and saw this game. All I said was, "Oh, Shit!" I've said it every week since then as I watched our wafer-thin, no tackling defense give up extended drives to the likes of Western Kentucky and USF and damn near blow a 30-3 lead to Georgia. After Georgie, I was thinking somewhere in my lizard brain that, SURELY WE ARE PREPARING FOR PAVIA AND HIS HOUDINI RUNNING GAME. Right? Wrong. Unless something changes drastically team-wide, my guys will do well to have a winning season in conference. I'm not getting on Kalen DeBoer unless this crap carries over to next year. The Tide goes out on a regular basis nut it always comes back in. Hook 'em if they can't take a joke. I strongly recommend the Horns defensive brain trust study that nasty tape from yesterday. Try some run blitzes or something. Don't be a catch and release defense. Vandy plays at Kentucky this week. Watch UK beat the shit out of them. Never give up, Joe. Bama's puck and girt have writ her name in Crimson Flame. Well, get to writing, you NIL prima donnas.- 1248 replies
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Big patches of empty in aggy level 3
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OC Write-up: Culture, Authority, and the Myth of Player-led Teams
Bama Llama replied to Bodacious Bevo's topic in Football
I’m no Longhorns fan but I am a college football fan with seven decades of memories. I do love the irreverent world of Surly and its predecessors. I am a Steve Sarkisian fan from his days at Washington through to the present. The job he did at Alabama was remarkable. I’m really glad he’s having great success now even though it led to last year’s debacle at Bryant-Denny, which in a way though has led to Bama sharing some of the glory with Texas for the time being. The player competence and quality at Texas is getting back to where it was in Mack’s heyday, with more and better to come. I appreciate what the OP wrote. Here’s what another Bama man had to say to freshmen. The year was 1958. His 1961 team were undefeated national champs. Total points allowed for the season - 25. -
And another thing, not to go all Edwin Newman here but exactly how and and when did “all the sudden” become a part of valid English lexicon? Does “the” mean the same as “of a”? Fuck, no. Every last sports announcer and pod caster says “all the sudden” without hesitation. Nossir, I don’t like it. It’s pure carelessness and a lack of fundamental reading at kindergarten level. It’s everywhere and it drives me as mad as Ren Hoek with a splattered paint background after Stimpy gave away the $47 million he had just won in the Gritty Kitty poem contest. “All the sudden” my ass.
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Brent Venables goes 45 in the left lane in his Tesla truck...
Bama Llama replied to TexArcher's topic in Football
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