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Bama Llama

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Everything posted by Bama Llama

  1. Heisman, Schmeisman. The Horns ain’t losing in the regular season and barring further dings, Ewers will be steering the rest of the way other than mopup time for Arch. Unless he lays a huge Ostrich 🥚 in the SECCG, it’s his for the taking. And I’m a Bama fan who thanks God Milroe didn’t go to the 40 Acres. Maybe I’m nuts but that’s how I see it. Texas will lay a fifty burger on Georgia. Put decent pressure on Beck and he gets the yips. Game ovah. Aggy has no prayer. UK will be a better game than aggy.
  2. Although Vandy y Diego Pavia are fully capable of ruining our Cinderella Boy on the 18th Green at Augusta Tears in His Eyes I Guess Season, I will whistle past that graveyard if the channels allow because I always relish Alldumb vs UGA at Athens, particularly when (a) the Dawgs have that Stephen King Stand By Me “Chopper! Balls!” mindset as they no doubt will this weekend and (b) the Plainsmen are mired trying and failing to get out of their own way. Kirby the Merciless rains molten terror on the Tiggers Sairdy!
  3. The crying, moaning and gnashing of teeth will be epic at DKR if the same call goes against the Horns on 10/19. A bad no DPI call never justifies more bad DPI calls. The call I described affected momentum and play calling for the entire rest of the game. Telling you this Gomer Pyle looking Geautreaux crew is pizen. May you never see them.
  4. Late in the game after they came all the way back and went ahead, UGA dbs were straight up assaulting our WRs. One wrapped up our WR from behind, pinning both arms, a full second goes by, the ball arrives WELL within the catch radius of our guy, and . . . Nothing. WORST no call defensive PI I’ve ever seen. If you see this crew (the head ref has a Cajun name, Gaudreaux or Bleauhole or something, looks like Gomer Pyle, eyebrows like caterpillars), prepare thine anus for reffuckery. Fortunately the refs eyes couldn’t follow Ryan Williams he was so smooth.
  5. As the autumn sun sets on the “Loveliest Village on the Plains,” no sound was heard but the mirthless laughter of the damned. Those assholes cannot. Suffer. Enough.
  6. Back in nineteen and sixty-nine when I was a freshman architecture student at the Institute on South Main aka Rice University, each week during football season we decorated the second floor exterior of Anderson Hall with a neatly lettered sign on a roll of 3’ wide butcher paper with jaunty slogans like “Beat the Aggies,” “Beat the Frogs,” “Beat the Longhorns (Ha!)” and so on. That year when the open date arrived, the sign on Monday morning shouted to the Rice community: ”BEAT OFF WEEK!” It stayed up until about 9:30 a.m. before the Campos ripped it down. The Owls were victorious against Off Week, mirabile dictu.
  7. Agree 100% IDGAF about any got-damn rank numbers until the last one after the NC game. Roll Horns and Hook ‘em Tide.
  8. Bama/UGA seems to always produce these Sweat Lodge type games, where you see what’s happening on the field but know the ending will somehow be twisted into a nightmare that turns into football victorygasm. But to get there you have to endure the spectre of blown leads, self inflicted, momentum-killing dumbassery, terrible no-calls and knowing you have tiptoed past the killer Rottweiler. Then you hear his chain rattle. I said after Tua and Devanta saved our ass I would never again bitch about anything that happens in an Alabama game. I’m not about to start now. Carson Beck has a “Tom Petty’s cousin who abuses small animals but has some great hash” vibe about him. Oct 19th in Austin will be a doozy. Hook ‘em and don’t take your foot off the accelerator of your pimped out electric Bentley, if one exists.
  9. Ky qb has no clock in his head. Repeatedly
  10. Ole Miss will penalize and undiscipline themselves into this being an overtime game. At least four hands to face / headgear calls vs OM have bern missed.
  11. Shady Llama!? My attorneys will be in touch with the proprietors of this organization on Monday for various actionable trademark, service mark and copyright violations, all of which can be forgiven for, let’s say, about tree hunnit fiddy, and liftime dining for two.
  12. Please God, let me live long enough to see Auburn find a new and turrible way to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory today. May the eagle 🦅 fly over the stadium wall, screeching “Fuuuuck thiiiiis shiiiit!” Woe Eeergah. Sorry if that helps OUSux but hey, it’s Auburn, which must always lose and look bad doing it. Fuck those front running assholes. This needs to happen before the Bama-UGA kick, as I have the nervous about Milroe having the Yips tonight.
  13. Those bozos will probably get pulled over for speeding by an Alabama fan state trooper and allowed to stew in the drunk tank in Bug Tussel for two overnights because no bond hearing until Monday.
  14. UGA breaks out new unis for the Bama game
  15. Mama and Bsby Llama left me at home for a couple of weeks and I watched the whole schmeer beginning to end. Just rewatched the last episode last night. Jesus it’s so much better without the interruptions. The Soprano family refrigerator “mark” set the tone for each scene. Either Tony says too much or Meadow rolls her eyes and pisses off Carm or Anthony goes off about some dumb shit as he plays in his cereal. Have to say my favorite moment of the whole series is Tony schumping down the stairs in his robe and slippers, singing 🎶 When I i i was a child, I had a fleeting glimpse, two ships on the horizon. . . . “. That or Paulie amazed telling Chris the “Ukranian guy (who eluded them) had killed 17 Czechoslovakians!” (Chechens) i kept hoping the ducks would come back. Gandolfini was mighty fuckin good. RIP, Tony PS/ Janice bugged the shit out of me. Dingbat needy frontrunner space cadet. Have you heard? Narcoleptic boyfriend.
  16. 66-6 Horns, which was also the score at the end of 3. 666 total yards Horns for the game. The 57 MSU fans still present drop their cowbells and flee shreiking from DKR when the 6’s align on the scoreboard . “Billy Joe! It’s thuh eeeeuund times!” Bully’s anus prolapses. Wasn’t DKR an MSU grad? PS - “Hail State” is a trite, repetitive fight song. Jack Crystal, MSU radio voice for decades, whose face resembled a bulldog, always pronounced it “MIshaSHIPPI SHTATE!” State once had a great placekicker named Justin Canale. He also played O line and D line, a la Lou Groza. Was a BIG motherfucker and kicked straight on, as all kickers did in those pre-soccer style days.
  17. MSU food and dairy services school or whatever it’s called sells 5-pound wheels of really good gouda and cheddar for Christmas gifts. Get your orders in before Thanksgiving. The dairy science guys produce half gallons of damn good ice cream. The food services school operates the MSU cafeteria about a block from the North end zone of Davis-Wade stadium. This is one outstanding and cheap cafeteria. Over at the bull semen collection lab, hazardous duty awaits Animal Science grad students equipped with a long pole and a small cup on the end. Bama Llama is an MSU grad, ‘76. It was a nice gig. Starkville is all right. Never went to any of the Walmarts there, but I don’t belittle the Starkvillians who do, to the Teasip bastage who posted that upstream.
  18. The bean counters at ABC (or whatever network streaming megatron entity has this thing) are jizzing all over themselves at the notion of Arch leading the Horns against his namesake’s alma mater, in New Orleans no less.
  19. Weather in Dallas can be freezy and wet in December, so there’s that.
  20. Along about now some of us semi-demented old folks get to assuming and wondering, viz.: Assuming Texas wins out in the regular season and the SECCG, where will their quarterfinal game be played? I can’t seem to find that answer after a lazy, quick search on what my dear departed father-in-law referred to as “the Interstate.”
  21. OU’s defense will be crying like a Kentucky db did after one of Spurrier’s patented score runups in the Swamp circa 1995 - “Man, it was like being trapped inside a video game where you couldn’t hit RESET!”
  22. Well, ain’t THIS a fuckin bitch!!? AL.com just posted that Dotard is “looking into” attending the UGA /Bama game next week. That sound you hear is Kalen De Boer smacking his forehead. Sonofa got damned mutha fucking bitch. He’s after those 11,000 votes again. Asshole.
  23. There’s a Darwin Award honorable mention here somewhere.
  24. Good stuff, Lab. May this seed sprout and thrive and bring you great prosperity. Bookmarked and looking forward to watching it cook!
  25. I’m as Bama as it gets but anyone who believes the team I watched struggle to play basic football for 50 minutes last night is in the upper tier of the top 25, much less the top 10, is delusional or blind. Unless something drastic changes, we will be seriously challenged in most of our remaining games and all of the away games (Wisconsin, Vandy, Tenn, LSU, OU). USF had receivers open for TDs behind or defense four or five times last night and overthrew them every time. Our O line play was C- at best and we made their QB look like Cam (spit on ground) Newton in a Heisman moment when he ran keepers. Thank God he can’t throw for shit or we’d be in the hot garbage bin todsy with ND, Michigan and Auburn (Patoo!). Sark’s only problem is keeping your guys’ Lambo premiums current. Nice job castrating the Wool Marines, BTW. Couldn’t happen to a more deserving front runner gang. Still, hope springs eternal.
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