Bama Llama

An article in poor old AL.com today said it pretty well. “Joe stepped up by stepping down.”

Aggy plays AT Florida, at Sakerlina and AT the home of bizarro last play snatch defeat from the jaws of victory, Auburn. If they get behind at any of those, the screeching from the home wackos starving for wins will be 747 takeoff loud. The false start flags will fall like rain 🎗️🎗️🎗️🎗️🎗️= Aggy loses in humiliating fashion.

Where have you gone, Case McCoy? LSU cornerback Javien Toviano turned himself in to authorities and was arrested Sunday after accusations of video voyeurism. The sophomore defensive back is accused of secretly recording himself and a woman July 5 and July 6 during sexual intercourse without her consent, per to the arrest documents obtained by WAFB. Oh that bad old LSU vidieaux. It'll get you every time.

Any statement about the 2010 BCS championship game beginning “If Colt isn’t hurt,” is Bevo pure speculation steershit. If Horns Nation had just accepted that loss and Colt’s injury as the breaks of footballad and not been Whiny Bitches Nation for 10 years and just accepted that loss like the bona fide hombres and football sages you profess to be, Texas would’ve been “back” long before now. Fuck, guys, you ARE back. Everyone knows it and acknowledges it. Be proud, well done. Now see if you can back it up and lay waste to the SEC this year the way you took charge last September in Tuscaloosa. Hope to see you in Atlanta or elsewhere this postseason. The Horns and Bama are on a collision course. The only variable is time.* Let’s Twist Again like we did last summer. I don’t see Texas being tested until the SEC Championship. * - A special trivia prize goes to anyone who can tell me who first said that and in what context. You’ll relish the answer.

Sam uses less coachspeak per interview than most. The Hogs have had several “characters” as head coaches. Crazy ass Houston Nutt, Easy Rider Petrino, buffoonish Bielema. Danny Ford was another one. Once when he was at Clemson, where his coaches show ndver got off the ground because he literally couldn’t utter a single sentence without saying goddamn, shit, hell or fuck, he participated in a written Q & A between top coaches and Sports Illustrated, sort of like school kids’ first assignment going back to school after summer vacation. One of the questions: What books did you read over the summer. I can’t recall any of the answers but Ford’s. Most coaches gave a goog response. Bill Curry answered with some thoughtful and philosophical nonfiction, Ofher coaches gave Hemingway or Stephen King or John Grisham as answers. Danny Ford - “I ain’t read no books.”

I hear you, man. It’s like Notre Dame’s fight song - what’s it called?, the Victory March? In 1975, my wife and I drove all the way from Tuscaloosa to Miami to watch Alabama and ND to play for #1 for the second year in a row. I was fired up long before they struck up the band. We were seated just above in the corner of the upper deck in the corner of the closed in of the old Orange Bowl. They have a row of 6’6” guys in plaid kilts in tall bearskin hats all across the front of the band. The intro is a long one but you know what’s coming. When the main melody kicks in, your adrenaline really zooms. I can only imagine what it’s like if you’re a Notre Dame fan. Hey, Duke Ellington said it right. Good music is good music. What makes it good? If I like it, it’s good! Roll Tide.

Marching Band Diarrhea may be defined as any playing of that Darth Vader dirge shit, Iron Man, Seven Nation Army, Night on Bald Mountain or that candy-ass A, B, C, D~E, repeat, repeat, followed by “Go Big (yell any color)!” or yell “Let’s Go (name any animal)!” Looking at you, Michigan.

Sir, I you have just coined a term which most aptly describes one of the lesser aspects of the “pageantry of college football.” Kudos.

That lardass is 220# about like Elvis the later years was 180# He does recognize a photo op when it hits him in the ear. The drama queen attention whore ordered the SS detail to slow it down a bit so he could fist pump his peeps and the media.

I hear you, brother. Someone needs to count the playings of Boomer Sooner vs Texas Fight at the RRR. Texas Fight at least has some variation to the melody and the snazzy trombone riffs. One of you original burnt orange eyes surly shaggy deacons should start a new thread, Away Games Shit We Hate, such as the egomaniacal PA guy at Ole Miss: “And that’s another FIRST down, Ohhhoooollllll MISS!” He gets his cookies a lot with the Lane Train offense. Obnoxious as shit. Been going on for two decades at least. The comely UM ladies decorating Vaught-Hemingway and The Grove somewhat make up for it. Somewhat. Heads may explode all around on Oct 26 when OU comes to Oxford.

Catchy? Maybe, but not so much the 10,000th time. If you enjoy it, watch the Vols - any sport, any venue. You’ll hear it five times each hour even if they don’t score.

Just wait for the extra annoying, aggyesque “Whoooo!” after “🎵 gooo - oood ollle Rocky Top 🎵” every fucking time, with all the monkey shit hazard orange clones singing along like a crazed mob of UK scoccer hooligans. It’ll be enough to force you to projectile vomick like the Monty Python wafer thin mint sketch, preferably on several of them.

Lots of Bama fans attend that game via various river routes by traveling down the Warrior, up the Tombigbee then up the Tennessee to Knoxville. Neyland is actually not bad for opposing fans. You’ll sit in the upper deck above the Tennessee River. If you get seated early, you can see the Vol band coming over the crown of a hill above the other end of the stadium. The flyover was cool the time I went. A fucking WW2 B-17 and B-29 circled the stadium spewing orange and blue (?) smoke. The players running out through the T was nice. Their fan base is a little more obnoxious than they used to be with that lardass ex-OU quarterback as a corch. And that godawful Rocky Top. It never stops, win, lose, TD, no TD, good plays, bad plays, it is INCESSANT. East Tennessee in mid-October is a beautiful place. Rent a cabin in the Smokies, sit back on the deck, listen to coyotes yapping, have a few sips of amber liquid and a victory cigar and enjoy. Been to a couple of games there and enjoyed one of them. Enjoyed the trip both times. On the way up, my eight year old daughter and her girl cousin held up homemade posters to passing Vol cars and received plenty of one finger salutes: ROCKY FLOP TENESSEE FALTZ SMOKEY SUCKS EGGS

Is ThuJone even still alive? If so, someone hook him up to an I/V of something real good and ask him to crank the MS paint back up. His bizarro Chizik is still one the best things I’ve ever seen. Pimp Horn Daddy at the Rose Bowl and any aggy furk overalls boy are right up there too.

This is Joe NOW. If the mental disintegration continues at this pace, where will he/we be in three or four more years. Jesus, Mary and (sigh) Joseph. I’ve never voted Republican in a presidential election and I’ve been voting since 1972. I’ll vote for a mangy yellow dog before I’ll vote for the best Republican, much less Donasseipe Trump, the Arch Enemy of Enlightenment.

Any hookers/athletic staff babe “escorts” on board, living or deceased? Either esy, this is standard off season adventures for UGA football. Meanwhile, on South Beach, Nick is checking his brokerage account statement between golf games. I look forward to hearing him go off when he starts ranting on Gameday.

Fowler/Herbstreit They’re okay but Fowler yells too much when he gets amped up. They’re like watching with your drunk buddies in the basement TV room of a freshman dorm. And ABC/ESPN misses several plays each game interrupting live action with graphics and game summaries. I don’t know if any other network does any better. I thought Klatt and whoever else did the Bama/Texas in Austin were very good.

And just think - Gary Danielson will not be on ANY SEC games, zero zilch nada!

SMU had 6600 students in 1970. Miami (FL) was 14000 in 1962. Football teams from both schools won games. In 1970-71 Rice was SWC conference champ in every sport not involving inflated pigskin. Blue and gray soaring down from the sky! Death from above, if you’re a field mouse.

Well put. Shame we never found out. Colt believed he could escape, dodge or slide around our linebackers but he didn’t make it. Turning point, leading to what you outlined above. Hell, all might have ended differently if Mack or whoever called the play had just let the first half run out without that ill fated shovel pass. We’ll never know but I know what Horns World will always believe. Shit man, enjoy riding the wave you’re on now and tip your hat to Sark and to Nick for giving him a job. I wasn’t sure if Texas would ever be . . . back.

Ahh, the Surly provincial stereotyping arrogance is thick and slimy tonight. You, sir, have stated a conclusion based on an incorrect presumption. No, in fact I attended the institute on South Main in Houston, Texas, where they taught me how to count to all sorts of big numbers and ehere, in 1970, LBJ and I and about 60,000 Texas Exes and 13,000 Rice faithful witnessed Rice run the opening kickoff back for a touchdown against Steve Wooster and the once mighty Longhorns, the post-1955 high water mark of Owls football until we finally won one in the MLB strike year (91?). Final score was something like 42-14. Wooster must have gained 250 yards that night. You teasip motherfuckers won big but had to come from behind against a school with 3,400 students. My Rice roommate is a history prof emeritus in Austin now.

The long-established thread I gave up looking for because it’s 24 topics down the page? Okay, then you’re right. You guys’ll be drawing and quartering Sark in a brand new thread if Texas doesn’t beat Michigan by 20. I, for one, hope you win by 30 and empty the Big House out before the end of quarter 3.

1. Steve Sarkisian, Texas So, what if we’re probably over-rating Texas in everything now that they’re back? Sarkisian’s a coach with significant life experience who has always been interesting in conversation. He’s been to the top, the bottom and climbed all the way back (if not higher) than where he was as the USC head coach. Sarkisian has an energy and mind that’s building Texas’ roster on the recruiting trail and scheming Xs and Os. Of all 16 of the SEC coaches, he’d be the most intriguing dinner-party guest. Using all those criteria, Sarkisian is No. 1. Tune in next week to see how poorly this prediction goes. https://www.al.com/sec/2024/07/sec-coaches-ranked-based-on-how-interesting-theyll-be-at-media-days.html Some interesting takes but off-season clickbait just the same. DeBoer #13 Pittman #2 Etc., Etc.

Your belief is misplaced. Alabama, Texas and OU do not have vet schools. I don’t know about the others other than Alldumb, LSU and aggy. Not likely Ole Miss has a vet school. I went to Miss State back in the days before electricity and all the pre-vet undergrads there were absolute aces. I ain’t no vet but highly respect them.

Mr. Cheney - Carlisle group is on Line 1 for you