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BearSchlong

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Everything posted by BearSchlong

  1. I just had a flashback. Would y’all find it weird for a woman have a C-section and then a tummy tuck while still under anesthesia? The way I remember it she was trying to swing a twofer with the hospital and anesthesiologist. It was 25 years ago, but at the time I could buy the logic.
  2. Agreed. Awful. I couldn’t imagine that call. I grabbed a few hours with my soldier at Ft. Polk/Johnson on Sunday; enough time to eat Crawfish in Deridder before his TDY ended. SF treats their guys like adults.
  3. I didn’t realize this had occurred. I ordered a few copies. https://www.aa.org/sites/default/files/literature/F-00_PLBB_Flyer_MF1.pdf
  4. BearSchlong

    1923

    See, I like Banner, for those reasons. He is actually my favorite character.
  5. Exactly. TLDR - FUPM NOW While I was onboarding to my new role yesterday, my kid (programmatic advertising manager) was jumping to a direct competitor for a 26% raise. Her company countered with 11%. She replied “you’re not listening. I’m a 25 yr old living in Chicago, you’re going to disrupt a lot more than $30k in revenue and projects by not paying me enough to where I don’t have to bartend at special events and be an extra on The Bear just to cover my expenses” She knows that’s the only way to rise is to boomerang. Middle class success is now defined by how much you can squeeze from the financially engineered corporate overlords. As for me, my work horizon is how much I can make in the next 9 months before the next reorg. 18 month sales cycle? If I owned the company, sure. We are living in a strange timeline.
  6. Got the gig, now I’m a federal seller. Make that 8,999 layoffs.
  7. Indeed.
  8. Buffet day from Omaha is going to be interesting this year. I was going to pass but I might go again before it becomes the Greg and Ajit show. At some point I need to either unload all my Nvidia or just forget about it and let it ride.
  9. The vibe I got with Uber Black was that the drivers were the Russians with enough snap to avoid getting sucked into Putin’s special military operation. iPhones in Cyrillic, answered questions with a glance and a grunt. I kept looking to see if they had earpieces with wires going down to their black suit jackets. I’m staying in my wife’s childhood city of Naperville at her godmother’s condo for a week in June, which isn’t convenient to our daughter’s place in Ravenswood nor my favorite places in River North, but whatever, it’s free. @irishtexan ain’t kidding about traffic in the loop - during rush hour you can walk faster than ride. My office is in River East, my kid’s (see below) is River North, and I definitely got my steps in.
  10. Every Saturday
  11. That’s a great summary. I’ve got an interview in a half hour with a former CEO of a company that got bought 9 months ago and now he’s a mere director. It’s really my only shot at avoiding the pink slip at megacorp, and I’m channeling my inner Peter Gibbons.
  12. Find a business partner that sells the solution that you’re great at solving and apply for a sales role. I’m curious as to what general problem you’re looking to solve. As a practitioner, you also might consider product management or enablement. I tend to look at everything through the lens of automation, because that’s been my gig for about 5 years now.
  13. @sbbruin bought his wife a Buick. I remember trivia like that.
  14. My wife loves to drive and has a very accurate sense of direction. This is counterbalanced by an intuitive talent for hitting every single pothole on the road. I’ll see one coming from several hundred yards in advance and immediately begin evasive maneuvers. But for her, it’s like a moth to a flame.
  15. I like the styling on those. Can’t wait to hear how she likes it.
  16. It was free from my library’s Libby app. It’s basically porn and golf, written by a woman. So so so cringey. But I really needed something mindless and stupid.
  17. I knew a young fella who stepped out in front of a car on College (Highway 90) in Beaumont to end it all. Witnesses said it was deliberate. I tried to help that kid for years but he was just broken. Afterwards, through family friends, I found out the lady driving the car was on her way to the airport to fly to a family vacation with her grandkids, and it affected her for years. So fucking unfair to lay that on an innocent.
  18. I’m entertaining opportunities, my DMs are open.
  19. Me right now, after the best sales year in my career. Layoff effective 30 days from today + 90 day package. Excellent reviews and management endorsements. I’m in enterprise software sales.
  20. BearSchlong

    1923

    Shooting the hobos was the most predictable Spencer thing ever. He should have just asked them “do you wanna die now, or in a few hours?”
  21. Also - last night my wife’s best friend turned 50 and I was up til 1am, drinking coffee and watching a half dozen drunk as shit Caucasian women having a twerk contest. What I really wanted to be doing was sleeping so I could rise at 5 and be on the water by sunrise on this gorgeous day. I’m pretty sure I’m about to upgrade boats, as wives are too much trouble.
  22. If you’ve gone 2 months without a drink it’s an epic waste of your time and the insurance company’s money to go to treatment. You’re either done or you’re not. I’m going to PM you my phone number, please feel free to give me a text or shout this week. One quick story to establish my bonafides - prior to being separated from alcohol for the last time 14 years ago, I was the poster child for psychiatric pharmacology. Since doctors wouldn’t confront me directly about my drinking habits, my disease manifested itself in everything from ADHD to bipolar disorder, and I was accordingly medicated. Eventually my condition was determined to be garden variety alcoholism of the unremarkable type. The brain zaps you report remind me of weaning from Cymbalta. There are 203 granules in a 60Mg capsule. I built an excel spreadsheet, and over several months opened each capsule and, using forceps and a jeweler’s velvet pad, removed and discarded the unneeded quantity until I was done. Brain zaps suck. Anyway, you and I have a shared experience and I would like to help. At the minimum I’ll try to be amusing. But to be transparent, I’m also going to suggest that you read a book called Alcoholics Anonymous. 40 million copies (no shit) have been printed, so it shouldn’t be too hard to find. Ok, I’m exaggerating. 37 Million is the actual number.
  23. I’m well over 40 shows now too, and you either have to appreciate the band in their current makeup or stop going. BStrong really has come into his own and I see Rashawn as augmenting Jeff’s perceived weaknesses. We all loved Roi and Boyd and for years I was the worst critic. At some point I stopped picking them apart and just leaned into the fact that this is my lifetime favorite band, for better or worse. I was much happier after that realization.
  24. Bought lowers for Friday and Pit for Saturday, last weekend of June, Chicago. This band is going to break me.
  25. My sister in law happened to be passing by a Waffle House when they were dismantling the sign. They were going to throw away the plastic letters so instead they gave them to her and she framed them, installed backlighting, and sold them on Etsy for $250 each.
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