Everything posted by BearSchlong
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Official Bitch about your Family Thread 2024: Holiday Edition
I lost my virginity to a half Italian/half Cherokee vixen on Dec 23 1987 while listening to Rubber Soul, so this hits hard. Bravo!
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I'm An Alcoholic
I may be starting an Al-anon thread. I'll bring details later; but my son and DIL left Christmas 12 hours early because of his sibling’s drinking. I have no objectivity wrt my precious little girl. Page 90 of the 12&12 and page 417 of the BB are my solace.
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Landman
Yep. I should have read your posts before spouting off like inside baseball.
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Landman
Also he said there is a good chance that Ambev is paying Sheridan for all the ultra jokes. Lean into the bud light hate for a demographic audience that can't be swayed, get them to buy more ultra. Same company. Season 1 of Yellowstone was bud until coors outbid them for season 2.
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Landman
My stepbrother is the Anheuser busch distributor marketing contact quoted at length in the WSJ articles throughout all the bud light blowback; I showed him the scene on Christmas eve and he laughed and said yeah Ultra is through the roof. My SIL hired the red clay strays for 3 events so that episode hit close to home.
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Official Bitch about your Family Thread 2024: Holiday Edition
Christ on a cracker its 1/3 over. Had 50 people over last night. Only one argument. I refuse to rehash past grievances so I after all the younguns retired to the patio with a case of wine I put on some Christmas jazz and chilled. I'm becoming my late father. I'll work like hell and pay good money for a big party but when I'm done I need a quiet room and some topo chicos. It was cold, and I had several propane firepits and heaters going. My main goal was to keep all my cousins kids from setting themselves or each other on fire. Mission accomplished. Made a gumbo from the meat and stock of a 12 lb Greenberg and that is just about the tastiest thing ever.
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Landman
Glad to see the Red Clay Strays getting some Sheridan universe love. Was at a party they played about 10 years ago and they are super talented. Segue to Bad Santa.
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Landman
I hope you get married one day and have a daughter whose hotter than a 2 dollar Rolex! This family is awesome
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Post a pic/gif/tweet that makes you say "very cool"
I had 50 relatives to the house last night for an annual Christmas party occurring since the early 1940s and that would have been useful.
- Landman
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Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do
I'm dying. Turned off the SHSU bowl game, took the dogs outside for a nice leisurely pre-bedtime bathroom break. I myself hosed down the rock formation behind what was previously a water feature. The dogs meander inside, climb the ramp and get in bed. Wife is loving on the dogs, giving belly rubs. “Did he poop while he was outside?” me: “I think so, we were out there for a while. “When I listen to his tummy I can hear his bowels moving” I lost my shit. Belly laughed for several minutes. “Honey, you are hearing digestive noises, you can't hear his bowels move because that would mean he was actually in the act of pooping. Those noises mean he just pooped and his digestive tract is working on the food he ate tonight” Of course she doesn't believe me and asks the dog if he needs to go back outside and poop. By this time Ive got the bed adjusted to zero G and turned the bed vibrator to high, getting settled in for the night. (aw fuck, she's on call and the bat phone just rang, somewhere in Texas a parent, child, and LEO are having an encounter and someone is headed to jail.)
- 2024 New Orleans Bowl - Georgia Southern vs. Sam Houston
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In honor of Luigi, stories/vids/pics/shit of people who had enough
Great documentary. https://www.google.com/search?q=tread+film&rlz=1CDGOYI_enUS1067US1067&oq=tread+film&gs_lcrp=EgZjaHJvbWUqEAgAEAAYkQIY4wIYgAQYigUyEAgAEAAYkQIY4wIYgAQYigUyDQgBEC4YkQIYgAQYigUyBwgCEAAYgAQyBwgDEAAYgAQyCAgEEAAYFhgeMggIBRAAGBYYHjIICAYQABgWGB4yCAgHEAAYFhgeMggICBAAGBYYHjIICAkQABgWGB7SAQgzOTI0ajBqN6gCGrACAeIDBBgBIF8&hl=en-US&sourceid=chrome-mobile&ie=UTF-8#ebo=0
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Dumbass Shit We See On Facebook
I need that “dilf’n ain’t easy” sticker.
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Formula 1 2025
Isn’t that the same model Kelly Clarkson drove before she got famous?
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Trivial things that please the ever living shit out of you
At lunch today a reasonably attractive looking lady around my age (50s) kept eyeing me and after about 20 minutes walked up to me, touched me on the arm, and said “you’re sexy as hell, why is it all the good guys like you are married?” My prompt reply was “what makes you think I’m a good guy? What if I’m really an evil badass?” Turns out she’s a rich widow and the holidays make her horny and lonely. Brenda, I hope you find true love and aren’t a serial killer. Still good for the ego.
- Getting old sucks
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Dumbass Shit We See On Facebook
Seriously, I can’t figure it out. Some help?
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Dumbass Shit We See On Facebook
Blotter on a potter?
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Trivial things that please the ever living shit out of you
B. That earns you the invite to the shareholder meeting in Omaha, which is a truly special event. For a father/son weekend. I might even take my son this year if he can get leave. No matter my portfolio, I never let my holdings of B fall below 1 share.
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2024 Houston Texans Season Thread
The biggest difference has been between Stingley’s ears. He had some off field “distractions” and early last year some teammates and coaches had to sit him down and question his committment. One of the injuries was actually a benching. The man has matured. Meanwhile Pitre is with the same girl since middle school.
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Yellowstone
Well, not a bad ending. At least the final song was good.
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Yellowstone
Who in their right mind would take any of the pharmaceuticals advertised during this godforsaken show? It’s meh TV interrupted by scary side effects.
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I'm An Alcoholic
Earlier this afternoon, a newborn infant entered the world, and her first blood test was positive for benzos.
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I'm An Alcoholic
I just witnessed my wife - in her official capacity, call an 18-year-old and tell him that his mother had died of an overdose and that he needed to come to pick up his nine and 12-year-old sisters from the county sheriff's office. Both fathers in prison. The kid didn't sound surprised. Heartbreaking. Every time she is on call I get to rework my 1st step.