I fully admit that I struggled to come with a better analogy in the edit window, mea culpa. I'll let this drop after this but I'm not even trying to get into chance of intelligent life, chance it comes to us, chance that it's not already extinct, etc. Those are all fun to think about, not trying to shoo those discussions away.
I just want people to be honest with the initial assumption, that common statement that you made that there surely has to be life out there. Why? There could be 1E40 planets and still we could not accurately say that life is likely or unlikely because we literally have no idea what the chances of life are, and no way to make even an educated case. Maybe we're multiplying that 1E40 by 10%, maybe be 1E-100%. We don't know.
You can WANT there to be life (or want there NOT to be life), write great stories about the implications, make kick-ass movies, etc. But to actually state there has to be life (or even more likely that not to be life) is pure smoke up the posterior.