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Everything posted by closetojumping
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Transfer Cycle 2024-2025 - Handjob Helobious Is the Man!
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
The whole thing reminded of the time when LotusHorn showed up on 247 and acted dead serious as he declared to the board, who waited on bated breath to read his "insider" analysis whenever he posted, that he'd discovered that closetojumping was Greg Davis. I had the same reaction when reading the punchline about Muhammad: Like that situation, I think whoever provided the news on Muhammad was just being fucked with by staff or agents or something. There's a passage I got memorized. Ezekiel 25:17. "The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you." I been sayin' that shit for years. And if you ever heard it, it meant your ass. I never really questioned what it meant. I thought it was just a cold-blooded thing to say to a motherfucker before you popped a cap in his ass. But I saw some shit this mornin' made me think twice. Now I'm thinkin': it could mean you're the evil man. And I'm the righteous man. And Mr. 9mm here, he's the shepherd protecting my righteous ass in the valley of darkness. Or it could be you're the righteous man and I'm the shepherd and it's the world that's evil and selfish. I'd like that. But that shit ain't the truth. The truth is you're the weak. And I'm the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin', Ringo. I'm tryin' real hard to be a shepherd. Are there some posts you've made somewhere on this site that you can link to that indicate that you aren't a total fucking moron? I'm trying real hard to keep my ignore list under 100, but the shit I've been reading from you lately is basically forcing my hand.- 8061 replies
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Transfer Cycle 2024-2025 - Handjob Helobious Is the Man!
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
To be clear, I don't think any of the 3 of us deserve any direct credit for anything that has transpired with retention over the past few days. Could be wrong about the other two guys, but I've not been involved with any of it other than bullshitting with folks. -
Transfer Cycle 2024-2025 - Handjob Helobious Is the Man!
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Yeah, same. Those guys have been huge for Texas, along a few others. -
Transfer Cycle 2024-2025 - Handjob Helobious Is the Man!
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
We're likely to know long before Friday if someone portals, mostly because the people covering Texas in the media can't help themselves. He removed all references to Texas from his social media yesterday and started following the transfer portal. They don't want the guy to leave, so it's allegedly been all hands on deck to retain him. It was the Hornfans era, so the worst I could have done was email him a message notice that a strongly worded letter was heading to his bbs inbox. -
Transfer Cycle 2024-2025 - Handjob Helobious Is the Man!
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
To confirm that he's pulled away from the ledge to the staff, team, and those out there trying to lure him away. Vegas, posters here, neutral observers all assume Texas is a top 5 team as the floor barring injuries based on what we know now. Beyond that, Texas could be the best roster in the country, and I don't see many naysayers offering up a challenge to that here, but that isn't a credible claim until we get to May 1. Humans are terrible about speaking with certainty regarding the future, so you should doubt yourself plenty. We don't know shit about August right now. Sarkisian's potentially speaking to NFL teams and so are Ryan Day and Dan Lanning. Any one of those guys going pro could lead to elite roster upheaval that benefits the others or someone else swooping in. More teams than OSU and Texas are worthy of examination. Each portal cycle is somewhat unprecedented in its own way. The spring window last year was kind of a nothing thing nationally. Maybe that's the same this time. Or maybe OSU is sitting there with $15M to commit and they decide they're going to blow it on 7 players at key spots from the other best teams in the country. Or Michigan or Oregon do that. Maybe Auburn goes bonkers again or SoCal does. It's not a rebel thing to say that Texas could have the best roster in the country for 2025. It's a fan thing and that's fine. I hope that's the case as well, but there are a fuckton of variables here. This thread reminds me of the duck illusion and some of Taleb's writing on asymmetry of information and also the problems with the asymmetry, in some instances, of risk/reward. Regarding the duck, everything about the little guy looks calm on the surface as he swims by you. Meanwhile, he's working his ass off underneath the surface as he's paddling by to get from point a to point b. Taleb's written quite a bit about how a lack of shared knowledge can still critically skew the perceptions of people within the same tribe or affiliation. That leads to wild surprises and division among the ranks, so addressing it proactively is often helpful. Sometimes it is unavoidable. Similarly but on a different problem is the lack of credit populations provide to people or organizations who prevent disasters from occurring, and therefore there's also an incentive or reward problem. How many 9/11s have been avoided? How many forest fires avoided with preventive maintenance (this example has been part of the discussion long before the Cali tragedy lately, so no CR intended)? How much future damage at a global level is being mitigated by productive climate change prevention efforts today and how much future cost of money and life is that in future terms (again no CR)? We don't really know because they're non-outcomes, and therefore we often fall into the logic trap of thinking because something didn't happen, it was never at risk of happening in the first place. What in the fuck does that have to do with this discussion? Well, some people have been working and donating their asses off over the past few days to prevent the collapse of the roster for 2025 for Texas. What do they get in exchange for that? Folks mocking concerns over NIL and the portal and speaking in certitude about the roster's future state against that of any college football alternative. Do not take where things sit for granted. The spring portal should be viewed as both enemy and opportunity on the horizon.- 8061 replies
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Transfer Cycle 2024-2025 - Handjob Helobious Is the Man!
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
It’s too early to know anything about next year other than we should reasonably be expected to be a top 5 team. This portal window doesn’t close until tonight and there’s another one in the spring. A lot good or bad things can happen to multiple teams between now and May 1. There’s a reason he posted that he’s returning.- 8061 replies
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Negative Recruiting Your Own School: The aggy Screenshot Megathread
closetojumping replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
I don't think Ewers will ever amount to much as a starter in the NFL either. He's too brittle, for one. He self-sacks and hears footprints too much as well. That said, if the guy has a career like Colt McCoy after going around the same draft slot, who the hell wouldn't consider that a successful career? He'd make $40+M playing 10 years in the pros as a back-up QB. -
Transfer Cycle 2024-2025 - Handjob Helobious Is the Man!
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
So Frank is a lawyer. Never knew that. I've given three depositions as a witness in my life. The last time I did one, the opposing lawyer called me a motherfucker and a liar (I wasn't lying) after losing his shit during the session. Apparently you're not supposed to do those things and he got in trouble. I found it quite entertaining. -
Transfer Cycle 2024-2025 - Handjob Helobious Is the Man!
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
The guy sucks. Tried it for the first time this holiday season. My teenage daughter and I both thought it was disgusting but delicious. My wife yelled at us like she was @Newy25. -
Texas has posted the most generic assistant coach job description ever written, with the earliest start date being Jan 21, 2025. I'm guessing we're going to see some new faces added to the staff shortly. https://utaustin.wd1.myworkdayjobs.com/en-US/UTstaff/job/Assistant-Coach--Football_R_00037404
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Transfer Cycle 2024-2025 - Handjob Helobious Is the Man!
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
This thread right now has clowns implying that the richest man in the world is their intellectual inferior, overt political whining, and an outbreak of rehashing shit that happened, and that we had to live with, from the years 2010-2021. We're at the point that multiple postings of guys we don't want to lose heading to the portal would improve the spirit of this thread. We are a special form of collective stupid.- 8061 replies
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You think Walker is more athletic than Collins? They’re both kind of enigmatic. Collins took forever for the light to go on, but it did. Walker wasn’t as disruptive this year as I figured he would be, given last year. Frankly, Walker sucked this year and Collins blew up. If they’re both projected in bottom part of a top 60/75, I’d rather have Collins.
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Transfer Cycle 2024-2025 - Handjob Helobious Is the Man!
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
“six times over, mate” -
Johntay Cook dismissed from the football team.
closetojumping replied to El Moco's topic in Football
In reality, most schools, including ATM and Miami, checked into the Cook situation as he left Texas. Almost all of them passed on the guy due to his serious underlying issues and his attitude accordingly. When ATM passes on someone they can starfuck, it should tell you that there is some serious shit going down with that player. Fisch/UW and a couple of other programs thought the old girlfriend trope of “I can fix’em”. UW noped the fuck out of this one immediately, though. They still received praise for their portal class and got to mock Texas in social media for being the idiots who let Cook walk, so I guess they still get a win somehow here?- 1202 replies
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Transfer Cycle 2024-2025 - Handjob Helobious Is the Man!
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
I wish positions and class designations and the team mascots were all proper nouns. I may just start always capitalizing them because fuck all of the rules these days, I guess. Plus, I know it will irritate you, Huck and various other proud pedants participating on this board. We don’t know enough about Michigan yet in order to truly determine if they’re always looming like a gargoyle over any recruitment they want. That is actually the case with Oregon. Ohio State is a peer at the head of the class. Being in the top 1% makes us a BSD, but not the only one, IMO. I think most of the recruiting regulars agree and understand. We cannot do anything to prevent ignorant hubris from infecting clowns on the football board and the random morons on this board that most of us have on ignore. -
Transfer Cycle 2024-2025 - Handjob Helobious Is the Man!
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Oh, you give a shit. And here’s the kicker, I wasn’t criticizing Taaffe in any big way a year ago. I just know that you are full of shit. -
Transfer Cycle 2024-2025 - Handjob Helobious Is the Man!
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
This is a non-response coupled with an ad hominem attack. You still have time to say “I got out over my skis and talked shit when I had no basis to do so, my bad. “ but you’re trending towards just being someone who needs to be condescending but has no history to support the rest of us being willing to let you pull that bullshit. -
Transfer Cycle 2024-2025 - Handjob Helobious Is the Man!
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Tell us why? I don’t remember you telling the rest of us how amazing he was last year or the years before it. Probably because he wasn’t. He knew where to be and didn’t get there. Now he’s caught up physically and we all love it. But I checked your posting history and I can’t find any predictions or defenses in favor of Taaffe in your posting history. So tell us why people rightly judging Taaffe on performance then and now is funny. I have an easily searched posting history here. Feel free to be less passive aggressive and put into sharp relief for the board those moments where I ever dismissed Oregon or Ohio State as threats to anyone’s roster due to NIL, including Texas. Michigan’s backing from Ellison is new, the other two aren’t. So “now”? No. Always has been the case. -
Johntay Cook dismissed from the football team.
closetojumping replied to El Moco's topic in Football
I’ve never used drugs so I’m not sure what does what, but wouldn’t meth also be possible? -
Johntay Cook dismissed from the football team.
closetojumping replied to El Moco's topic in Football
No idea. -
Transfer Cycle 2024-2025 - Handjob Helobious Is the Man!
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
I don't agree. The hit rate for 5 stars is higher than 4 or 3 stars and they don't cost what an AA or CFP starter will cost as they contribute early. Sometimes they're not going to work out, but often they do. There's arbitrage available for teams with money in two ways. Overpaying for 5 star HS guys because they're still "cheap" by comparison to major CFB starters and, separately, having a rich, old billionaire who wants to win a title before he dies and just letting him spend so much money that it causes everyone else to throw in the towel for major CFB starters. Texas has taken advantage of the first scenario and has been beaten up like everyone else in the second. -
Transfer Cycle 2024-2025 - Handjob Helobious Is the Man!
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Two media guys in the state of Kentucky just making shit up to make Louisville look better or some shit. Texas isn't pushing anything like that out there for mediocrity from the portal. -
Transfer Cycle 2024-2025 - Handjob Helobious Is the Man!
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
It's not nothing, though. That's two 5 star recruits who were starters on an outstanding defense. Sucks to lose them, if indeed they both go. I expect there to be more pain than just MM (and perhaps DW), personally. -
Are his hands elite? I don't recall any/many drops. I feel like that's something that isn't valued in the draft though.
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Transfer Cycle 2024-2025 - Handjob Helobious Is the Man!
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
He's also a transfer risk. He thought he would be playing early and often. Anyone worried about safety is likely justified in being so.
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