closetojumping

I don't go over there much because the content is crap and the posters creating it are dumber than a sack of rocks. In addition to that, the posters affiliating themselves with UT have to mostly be socks from other fanbases. I've seen multiple handles get basic shit absolutely wrong about Texas in ways that even a casual UT fan would not. On top of that, most of the UT handles don't post on UT sites I've seen and they mostly have IQs in the room temperature range, common amongst posters on that site alone.

Arguing that Tom Herman is a bad coach is a weird hill to die upon. You can't really believe that, right? I can't stand the guy and I am glad he's gone, but @Frank Drebin's already done a good job of addressing why he doesn't fall into the category of "bad coach" much less "worst coaches in history". We don't need to look very far to find proper candidates for "worst coaches in history". Texas has had a few doozies. Ed Price, Chuckles, and Jack Chevigny all can easily be argued in favor of being bucketed into the "worst coaches in college football history" list. I agree that that is a thread waiting to be created because there is some genuinely hilarious shit out there about some of the disasters that could be named in that thread. And interesting things as well, I guess. Jack Chevigny, I've known of for years, but I didn't look him up until today when I was trying to recall his name. He died as a marine corps officer on the first day of the battle of Iwo Jima (a really, really bad hill to die upon). RIP. Never coached again after being fired at Texas and was also the guy who scored the winning touchdown in the "win one for the Gipper" game at ND vs Army. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jack_Chevigny

Sanders pretty much sucked last year against teams that had a decent or better defense. I'm sure the terrible OL played a big part in that. NDSU will be competent at a minimum on the defensive side of the ball. For a guy getting ongoing hype as an early 1st round pick, shouldn't everyone expect this dude to be worth a fuck tonight? If he goes for 400+ against these guys, I'll be impressed.

We had rented out one of the suites and had about 20 people in it. Next to us on one side was a group of Arkansas fans who had done the same. Everyone minded everyone's own business until late in the 4th. With a few minutes left in the game and plenty of booze now in their bloodstream, the Arkansas hillbillies decided to start talking shit. We jawed back a little and then they kept running their mouths, mostly thoughtlessly with comments like "Texas sucks" and "Fuck Texas". My little brother had finally had enough and gave them a dismissive hand gesture waving them off and said, paraphrasing, "We're Texas. We're mediocre now but we'll be back on top soon. You're Arkansas, you're mediocre forever! This is your biggest game in years and it's at a shitty bowl game against a .500 team, you fucking hillbillies. It's pathetic." With that, the Arkansas folks shut up and went back to minding their own business. It was a fun and bittersweet moment, and looking back, it still is. I didn't think Strong was going to make it, but I didn't think it would be almost a decade before Texas was discussed in the national title picture again. Good lord. Ian Boyd is the Charlie Strong of football analysts.

I don't blame them. I would pimp Colorado and Sanders for as many clicks as possible before everything burns to the ground in Boulder over the course of another losing season. Beyond that, it should be a good game and Deion is must-see tv whether because folks love him or because they like watching slow motion train wrecks. It might just say a lot about making a decision to leave for Los Angeles while staring down the barrel of another winter in Fargo, ND. Probably some of both.

He’s a tub of goo who might die of heart failure on the field this Saturday.

I’m unapologetic about it and have said as much on the boards for 25+ years. Cheer for your opponent at full speed all you like, and I’ll laugh and roll my eyes every time I see someone saying as much.

I cheer for injuries. Not on specific players except for Dallas Turner and other dirty fuckers like him, but just generally would like to see all opponents more injured than Texas. It’s a violent sport, people are going to get hurt, give me as many people getting hurt that we play as you can, dear football gods.

You've got to believe in a team returning 6 starters total being coached by a dude whose most recent HC experience is at the mighty Holy Cross, home of Gordie Lockbaum. Maybe don't put your mortgage money on them and dial it down a little.

Good link. You didn't even mention the best part! RC Slocum apparently stole Tim Brown's towel from the Japanese game: "I got a towel that he gave me over there," Slocum said, describing a long white linen with Japanese writing on it above gold stitching that says "TIM BROWN, UNIV. OF NOTRE DAME, JAPAN BOWL." A sweet towel. It hangs in a frame on the wall of Slocum's house in College Station all these years later, which came as a surprise even to Brown. "Wow!" Brown wrote via email, his only response to questions for this story. "I have more questions than I do answers. Maybe Coach can fill in the blanks." It's a bit of a mystery to Slocum, too. "I don't know how I got it, either," Slocum said, laughing. "We joked about the Cotton Bowl towel over there. I spent a week with him. We had a great time." In the frame, Slocum also stuck a card he got later, from a 1991 set of cards that had a "Heisman Hero" series. Brown's card is autographed, with the inscription, "To Texas A&M and the 12th Man." ******** Slocum has always been miscast as some sort of great dude because he comes across publicly as this affable idiot. In reality, he's a shithead. Dude was sleeping with his secretary and got publicly outed for it by his wife. He engineered the aggie bag game under Sherrill and kept it going full bore after taking over the program. It was only under the threat of the death penalty and severe sanctions including tv bans and bowl bans did that idiot disassemble parts of it. He's actively lobbied against Texas on a number of issues over the years and has been a constant feed to writers in terms painting Texas in a bad light. Of course that simple idiot would steal a dude's towel, forget that he did it, and then brag about it and put it on display.

Sherrone Moore and Wink Martindale were interviewed by The Michigan Insider this week. They acknowledged that the interior DL is the most banged up unit on the team. Rayshaun Benny is expected to be a key part of the rotation. He's coming off of a broken ankle injury and can play on it, but he's not nearly 100% and won't be when they play Texas. Mason Graham has missed practices but will play Saturday. They've been cagey about info on Graham's injury. I think that is something to watch on Saturday in terms of how much and how well he plays. They have another guy that they want to see step up, but he's a pussy and is constantly "hurt" at the 3rd starting LB spot. They might as well have called the dude a goldbricker. They have two transfer LBs, one from Nebraska and one from Maryland, who will also start. The Maryland transfer is a thumper but not a sideline to sideline guy, as far I can understand in terms of the comments. The Nebraska guy is the defensive playcaller and he's also apparently an "overthinker", per Martindale, who can think his way out of plays sometimes. Okay then.

Anderson's injury is a big enough deal that they're not providing updates on progress. Just "he's not practicing" and now "he's not playing" but inferring that he'll be back soon. They did this last year with several players who missed chunks of games or ended up being out for the season. It's interesting to watch. They're not exactly loaded at WR and now this puts Brenan Thompson on the field as a starter.

An interesting thing about the OL for ND is that they're choosing to bench at least two guys who have started games and have playing experience to instead play guys who have never taken live fire before Saturday night. I don't really know whether that means the younger guys are just substantially better or if ND is taking the opportunity to build a unit that could be great the following two years together.

Regarding Coastal Carolina and Jax State, I forgot that Tim Beck is coaching at Coastal Carolina. They went 8-5 last year with a quality QB. Their worst record since 2019. Is it going to surprise any of us if this program plummets back below .500? I basically see it as likely. Dick Rod versus Tim Beck is truly a bizarro match-up.

We mostly do this when we go watch a game at a sports bar. If someone starts working a split check down to anything but an equal split, I'm never dining out with them ever again. When my wife sets up a double date with another couple and we've never gone out with them before, that's always a concern. Please don't let the other people be cheap. It's painful.

Well no shit, but did it make you laugh or smirk? I don't know anything about the dad and his behavior for it to resonate. We're not on NextDoor here.

Sorry if this has been addressed, but how do I actually avoid handing the ball off to the first option in a triple option or when calling RPO. I'm sure it's something simple that I missed, but it's caused me to never call those plays.

I remember it being 57. Not self-loathing enough to go look up any part of that shit though.

I know nothing of Klubnik's father, so this one is lost on me and likely most anyone else reading it who doesn't know the family.

I get rationally pissed off when I go to dinner with five other people and someone attempts to get the rest of us to split the check six ways.

I have a simple request for @immamac to live up to the shit this site talks, because this kind of bullshit makes it easy. Find where I overtly said that Sarkisian is back on the sauce, where futureman claims I did. I’m being asked about it now. If I did it, ban me. However, if I didn’t and this guy is attempting this here because he is an angry and worthless troll, IP ban him. There’s no reason to keep one of us around, depending upon who is right.

Shut the fuck up you enabling idiot. Any more ignorant idiocy from you and you should join the other uninformed rubes in silence. Christ. Thank you. Christ.

Boy, I haven't even seen a futureman post quoted in forever. I forgot that that rube existed. Anyway, he's lying. I never overtly stating anything about Sarkisian drinking. For anyone who doesn't have that piece of shit on ignore for some reason, feel free to neg that bandwidth drain for me.

I enjoy these threads and adding my thoughts/predictions to them. I have absolutely nailed some weekends over the years and made a complete fool of myself often enough as well. CFB is the best because it is obnoxiously hard to predict. Thursday: -I know NDSU isn't what they were under Kleinman, but they are still tough in the trenches. CU has allegedly firmed things up on the OL. Why? I don't know. They lost their best OL starter to the portal and will have at least one true freshman OL starting. NDSU is a trendy/desired pick to straight up beat CU. I expect CU to win this game and I am here for it either way. If CU's OL shows signs of life, I'll start to regret buying the under on 5.5 wins this year. -Minnesota and UNC are both sneaky teams due to schedule to make a run at a title game appearance. The Minnesota QB is a New Hampshire transfer and Fleck has been celebrating the guy as a surprise Big 10 star this year. I have no idea what to make of that. UNC is favored on the road breaking in a new QB. I like Minnesota to win. If UNC wins, they will start to register nationally as a team that could be an ACC arguing point for a second or third CFP team because of their pathetic schedule. -Jax State has QB transfer from Furman that is getting some NFL buzz - Tyler Huff. I doubt I watch this game, but something of note for those who do. Friday: -FAU/MSU - this is the kind of game that Herman has historically won. I'm taking FAU in a shocker in which people declare the Jonathon Smith Era DOA but means nothing for MSU's actual future. Herman begins building his Lane Kiffin case for a return to P4. -OU/Temple - this game will be a blowout that tells us nothing about OU but causes Stan Drayton to begin working on his resume surreptitiously on the flight home. Temple is a bottom 10 out of 135 FBS team this year. -The guy at Stanford can fucking coach. Sonny Dykes on the road would concern me as a bettor. TCU wins, but the game is closer than expected. Saturday: -UGa might be starting a walk-on at TB and won't have Etienne or several back-ups. They lost their two main offensive threats to the NFL. Lovett is a serviceable #3 WR and will be UGa's #1. Mike Bobo is calling plays. Great OL and Beck, but that's a lot working against UGa. Clemson's strength is a top 15, maybe much better, defense. No one is giving Clemson a chance and Dabo is being underestimated. I'm taking Clemson with the shocking upset and it still doesn't change my opinion of Clemson for the year. -You have transposed the rivalry between Pitt and WVU onto the game against PSU. It made me laugh to think about it, really. This one could be an upset as well. If Allard is actually the dogshit he looked like last year, WVU has more than a prayer. Vegas doesn't really think so, though, giving WVU +8 at home. -The far better 3rd "early" game is Okie State hosting SDSU at 2E/1Central. I expect that to be a fistfight because of the way Gundy approaches the early season and due to the fact that SDSU is part of the cream of the FCS crop. -You summed up the Miami @ Florida game as well as one can. Whatever the fuck happens in that game should surprise no one. Someone comes out of that game with their hair and ass on absolute fire. Should be fun. -Michigan is going to have to actually run their playbook against Fresno. Fresno is a good G5 team, but Michigan is also replacing 18 starters and needs to actually figure out what they have. Orji is "freak athlete" in the sense that he's big and can run the ball and couldn't hit the broad side of a barn when he throws the ball. It could be an ugly win for Michigan. Sunday/Monday: -Give me Lincoln Riley's offensive mind over anything LSU can counter with fat fuck Beau Baker's brother as DC. -Castellanos should give FSU fits. I'm not in the new "FSU is going 4-8!!" crowd and I expect FSU to win this game. That said, it's another beating for FSU while dealing with a brutal schedule. Might matter for them down the line heading to somewhere between 6-6 and 9-3.

I will give you a 6 pack and a bag of chips for Pearce. I don’t get it. I know the new blocking scheme isn’t conducive for him as a back, but just looks like he sucks. If someone offers them anything, they should take it.