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closetojumping

Burnt Ends
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Everything posted by closetojumping

  1. Congrats on all of our your worldly virtue. That said, don’t bring politics into this thread, you fucking dunce. No one else did it. No one wants to hear it. Tell some old story about your dad and Bear Bryant or something but get fucked on that other shit. Also, we all know Texas could well shit the bed tomorrow. It doesn’t change anything. Our school is superior to yours, MSU, and myriad others in this conference loaded with mouthbreathing clowns. We know it and you know it. Good for you that your institution is solely defined by the performance of your football program, but we get to have a worldview far beyond that premise, and our university helps enable that. I avoided bringing up ATM in this thread because many posters here are moths to that flame and then the thread just devolves into more boring ATM discussion. Beyond that, ATM’s academics far exceed those of Mississippi State. It’s a disingenuous comparison on that front. I can see Minneapolis being fun for a weekend with the right company. I’d take that road trip if Texas did a home and home. They tried to recruit me in HS because some of my teammates were visiting there. I looked them up and their academics fit below my high school’s. That school was academically functioning at a Texas junior high level.
  2. Good lord. This tracks, I guess.
  3. They spent 5 consecutive weeks ranked #1 in 2014 and finished the season ranked #11. That's probably the most relevant they've ever been.
  4. Come down for a visit to the ship channel on 225 here in Houston. I'll take you site-seeing to my old stomping grounds in Pasadena, as well as the lot where the shanty I grew up in was condemned, then we can mosey on over to the Goodyear rubber factory and you can take in all of the sites and sounds your senses can handle. By the time we're finished, you'll feel like you've been to Starkville and back.
  5. The validity of your first point is called into question by the inanity of your second point. Academic talk is front and center in the original shit talking post because we are examining the entirety of the product, in this case, a shithole institution in a shithole state. I was deliberate in discussing "major" or P4 schools as the comparison. There's probably 1000 small or largely unknown schools that we can discuss otherwise.
  6. Part of my point* is that Mississippi State brings nothing to the table. They are in a shit location, with shit academics, with shit athletic history, with a shit brand. All of those schools you named bring at least something to the table, and many of them bring a lot to the table. "Illinois, Syracuse, Minnesota, Maryland, Rutgers, Purdue, Northwestern, Michigan st" NW is a great academic school. The rest are mostly decent to good, with Syracuse ranking the lowest at 75, a full 133 spots ahead of Mississippi State. NW is in Chicago. It's an awesome away game to visit if you like a cool big city, murder rate notwithstanding. MSU, Minny, Syracuse, they all have solid to excellent football histories. Minny is in a big city too, albeit not a visit I would call "cool", but I've only visited the twin cities for business. I could get excited about a few of those trips, but I can extol the virtues of some or all parts of those schools and programs with a straight face compared to MSU. *Another part of my point was that running over an also-ran like Mississippi State also gave me the chance to take potshots at multiple other shitheel schools that I don't like or respect in the original post. Hey, look, I like to take CFB road trips. I was supposed to go to UK and Georgia this year but life stuff intervened. Been on 30+ visits away from Austin either way. That said, I don't have Starkville in my future plans unless I have a kid that becomes a starting QB there or something crazy.
  7. Also, that looks like a burrito. I know Ketchum could eat his way through a city block of tex-mex, so surely it's just the picture and he's not actually that ignorant, right?
  8. I can't believe this is a question I am asking in this life, but when was Seven Win Steve caught on camera, eating boogers?
  9. I don't see any "tell me about MSU" type of threads, but I have some unpleasant thoughts to put out into the ether. I've also spoilered some content that gets more voluminous on the banality of Mississippi State as an institution for tl;dr imbeciles. Mississippi State is perhaps the most boring brand in the entirety of major college athletics. Someone lamented on the game week thread that "no one is excited for this game". I doubt I'm the only person who read that and thought, "who in the fuck gets excited to play Mississippi State?" Even if they were good, who would be excited to play MSU? "Dude, we've got Mississippi State this week!" Right. Does Ole Miss get excited to play them? Alabama? I guess, having watched 20+ Egg Bowls, I can agree that Ole Miss actually gives a shit but that's about it. This is a brand and school that is as plain as grits and as competitive as a hippie commune. Starkville is as appealing as a destination as visiting a tire-making factory. I've tried thinking about who else rivals the Mississippi State melancholy as an opponent for anyone out there. Who can do it? -Baylor? They are in Waco. But they've managed to institutionalize rape and murder cover-up. They have better colors, also. They're not completely boring. -Indiana? Bloomington is supposed to be a great place to visit and they used to be a blue blood in men's basketball. Way better academically as well. -Iowa State? A case can be made here. They're marginally better academically. Their colors and uniforms are better and they've had some hot meme girls. I don't know anything about Ames. I don't know, maybe ISU is an analog. -Wake Forest? They've been good before in other sports and Winston-Salem is a great town with some history. Way better academically as well. -The best candidate is probably Texas Tech. The only thing saving Lubbock from being as shitty as Starkville is the fact that Lubbock is at least inside the state of Texas. Tech's academic ranking is just 10 rungs up above MSU's, coming in at 198 in the US News & World Report rankings. Also, Tech is about as futile as MSU when it comes to athletic performance. Maybe Tech really is an analog, and Texas just traded one shitty conference affiliate for another. P4-wise, I am not sure who else could objectively be considered on par with being as moribund as Mississippi State, but I'm interested in other suggestions. This is a really boring, uninspiring pack of mouthbreathing gypsies with whom Texas has moored itself. It's grim. Mississippi State's academics are on par with a third world country's. As pathetic as Mississippi State's academics are, their historical athletic performance might be worse than the academics.
  10. Excited? No. I doubt I could be excited to be playing a shitty Mississippi State team in any universe. I don't think I could be excited to be playing a great Mississippi State team in any universe, either, if I'm being totally honest. I find that school and program to be abysmally boring. They're the SEC version of Iowa State or Indiana or Wake Forest. Indiana is great this year and who is excited to play them? Mississippi State probably would be, I bet. I am, however, anxiously looking forward to the game, for the reasoning you mentioned. There is nothing better than CFB season. I watched Teh Major get win #2 for the year last night against a Georgia State team that is now 1-7. A clash of 1-6 teams, and it was a great game to watch, especially while drinking homemade rye Manhattans.
  11. I know you huffed too much spray paint as a child to likely fathom this, but what the hell - I didn't call for your negging. I'm not a moderator and I don't mind if someone, even you, liked some idea of mine and made something out of it. I didn't even neg you, doofus. You could have attributed the source, at least, but my expectations of what you're capable of are so low that I can't even be annoyed about that. I'm just kind of amazed you figured out how to start your own thread.
  12. Helobious is the human version of the 2025 Texas Longhorn Offense.
  13. Hahahaha. @Lerka Lerka here is an example of someone putting in way too much effort. This dude's original post was one sentence long. He apparently went back and looked through posts of mine in order to find subjects he could attempt to poke holes. He edited his post 30+ minutes later. And BO&W, the "we all remember" notion is comical coming from you, given that your use of the royal "we" on this board implies that you're working within some sort of peer set. I thought one of the central tenets of being an incel was always approaching circumstances as an outsider and living without alliances?
  14. What I wrote took virtually no effort. I'm usually posting to avoid actual effort in some form. "nattering nabobs of negativity" is a famous line from Spiro Agnew from when, I believe, he was being pressured to resign from the vice presidency during the Nixon regime. Again, I'm guessing that took no real effort. If you want effort, we should have a real alliteration or metaphor contest as it relates to this season and our varying levels of despondence.
  15. There are plenty of examples of guys who were valued for their work as OCs or DCs who eventually gave up the playcalling role as an HC. Saban, Drinkwitz and Mack Brown are easy examples to recall either due to proximity or recency. There are many examples of guys who refused to drop being a playcaller and it cost them their jobs. Will Muschamp and Billy Napier are easy examples for this board. Now, name the guys who called plays and won national titles, real quick. Spurrier is one. Who else? Sir Edward Beauregard Orgeron, Esq., certainly didn't. Meyer? Nope. Smart? Nope. Swinney? Nope. Carroll? Stoops? Nope. I guess Jimbo Fisher, somewhat hilariously, is another. Point is, you can find one about every dozen years or so who did it. The rest of the guys dating back to the early 90's were all very involved with their sides of the ball, but they recognized what needed to happen in order for them to truly win. There is a boneyard full of HC tenures in which the guy couldn't let go of his shiny object and cost himself, his program, his players, and the program's fans a shot at greatness. It's just selfishness. We've already pointed out that the results for Sarkisian are visibly short of elite and the trend is decidedly negative, and the sample size is not small. His case for continuing down this path is paper thin.
  16. We've all noted your fatalistic certitude, as you've been spraying this board and the recruiting forum with it, one shitty post after another. Do the rest of us a favor and work on some new material or shut the fuck up. You're trending towards being a spammer with your whiny bemoaning and it's adding zero value to each thread.
  17. Sarkisian as a CEO has been close to elite. That cannot be said for his performance, ever, as an OC while also the HC. Sorry. You cannot find data and cite it to support a counter to the notion that the OC role is not a strength for Sarkisian while also head coaching. As to the rest, a lot of you guys are chiming in about how this will be handled before the season outcome is even known. If Texas somehow goes 9-3, no one here has a fucking clue what will or won’t be done in public or private. 5-7 to 7-5, sure. Above that, we have no idea. I want Sarkisian to work out and win titles at Texas and I think he can, which isn’t how I saw the hire on 1/2/21. That said, I feel like him failing ahead of 2028 is a reasonable hedge to my outlook, based on what I’ve seen this year. If you’re taking bets from anyone, I’ll take the counter to your position for $500.
  18. ST was in reference to Special Teams, not Becton. Also, whoever told you that CDC played a role in hiring Becton seems super informed. I keep hearing this shit about Flood and Sarkisian “beefing” from you guys that like to sniff some the farts of some of the more idiotic $9.95ers in Texas’ orbit. I’ve asked about it to several folks and it sounds like this is bullshit or story-inflation. Beyond that, I just fucking typed out that Flood isn’t calling the shots with approach to how the line needs to be blocking. Sarkisian has always run a soft offense, long before Flood was involved.
  19. This is a different Tim Beck. Shitty Tim Beck is the HC at Coastal Carolina.
  20. Regarding the assistant coaching discussion, here are some thoughts from my end: -Flood's not guy driving the bus regarding the approach to OL blocking, according to those familiar with the practices. He didn't forget how to coach overnight, either. So firing him is probably something Sarkisian does in order to save face after the season. -Sarkisian is a poor OC as a HC. The numbers bear out that he's generally done a mediocre to shitty job and that isn't going to change with a new OLC. One of the biggest issues with Sarkisian's offensive approach is that it is finesse-oriented. That's just not going to fly in the SEC against the athletes they're facing on everyone's front 7s. With the most talented OL Texas has had in decades last year, they often struggled to run the ball against good defenses. Point is, for the OL to really improve, Sarkisian's approach needs to change as much as anything. Seems unlikely. -Milwee needs to go. Sarkisian needs to hire an independent QB coach with actual skins on the wall. No QB has gotten better at Texas during the Sarkisian era. Not one. 2 of the highest rated QBs of all time have gotten to campus and not improved. One got drafted as an afterthought in the 7th round. The other has become a laughingstock and an accidental meme generator and he's embarrassing himself on a weekly basis. That's all on Sarkisian in some form, but he's not going to fire himself. He needs to fire his buddy and hire someone who can call him on his bullshit and coach the QB room. -What are we seeing and learning from Chris Jackson? Do we see WRs getting better? It's somewhat hard to discern with the OL being historically terrible while the QB is constantly either running for his life, shitting himself or doing both. -Too early on Huff. -I don't see anything happening with Banks and the TEs actually seem like they're improving with reps.
  21. You are pig wrestling, which is fruitless, unless you're the pig. All you get is muddy, as there is no winning. Meanwhile, the pig enjoys it.
  22. Lewis in Charleston is fucking great. Can compete with anywhere in Texas.
  23. Hahahaha. It is to laugh. … This is year 5. Steve Sarkisian has been given everything. EVERYTHING he has ever asked for or needed with this program. Many people have spent real money to support this fucking dipshit. He’s coaching a soft offense with a shit run game. Maybe you’re too dumb to grasp all of this, but the only pussies involved with this program are those coaching the offense, the finesse bitches on the OL and the QB who shrieks every time he hears footsteps.
  24. My dad was raised a Texas fan and then was recruited by DKR. Tore his knee up his senior year as a CB and had offers pulled from everywhere. Ended up choosing Rice over Tulane. He raised his boys to be Texas fans and has been as big a diehard as any person I’ve ever known who actually went to Texas, me included. The t-shirt whines have simply never passed muster for me.
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