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Zeus

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Posts posted by Zeus

  1. 1 hour ago, Red Five said:

    Alright I give up. Who does Sark look like? I've been trying to figure it out for three months now. A friend told me Johnny Manziel but I don't think that's it. 

    There's a cartoon character. Its the nose. I can't think of it either rn

  2. 41 minutes ago, Doc Reeves said:

    We gotta figure out a practice facility guys. 

    Yeah there's this little project going on in the South Endzone right now, but I agree that freeway-side practice field never made any sense. Gotta smell like hobo piss and diesel fumes right there.

    • Hook 'Em 1
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  3. 14 hours ago, The Earl of Texas said:

    Texans won the division and a playoff game two seasons ago. Astros went to the World Series two seasons ago, came within a game last year, and they’re clearly going to be good again this year. Rockets won their division last year and a playoff series. Yes, Rockets and Texans are bad right now, but let’s not get carried away. Rockets could remedy quickly with the right (tanked) draft pick this summer.
     

    tilman_fertitta.jpg

    woah woah woah hold your horses

    The Rockets fired Morey remember? They aren't going to get any good FA signings for a LONG time. No superteam = no championship.

    • Hook 'Em 1
  4. 21 hours ago, closetojumping said:

     

    Just seeing this since the thread came back up and I clicked on it. Mack Brown shit on the Texas job to Urban Meyer. He's actively worked in the past to undermine Texas having success while he was still paid by the program and since through his buddies when assistants ask around or his media friends reach out to him off the record, including Herbstreit. Anyone with a fucking mediocre connection to either people in the media or UT athletics knows all of this. 

    It's not some conspiracy theory or outrageous claim. A petty, selfish, insecure bitch of man can and often will do what they can to preserve their own legacy within an org at the expense of the institution and other people, and this happens throughout the world every day, from levels high to low. It's happening right now at a corporation or small business, government agency, or religious entity within a 25 mile radius of any of us. If you're on a plane and reading this, someone is actively doing this while they hurtle through the air at 500 mph. It's as common and basic as breathing air. 

    Guys like @Rimbo and @StassneyHorn who show and claim skepticism do so because they put some bizarre level of "greater good" thinking on a role like HFBC at Texas. Some people have a need to put roles and people in those roles on a pedestal. No one benefitted more from being put on a pedestal and being given the benefit of the doubt by his/her constituency in CFB during the past 15 years than Mack Brown at Texas, save perhaps Joe Paterno. Both men eventually failed in their own ways in such a level, in part due to their insulation and reach, that not even their phalanx of sycophants could spare them.

    Source?

    also fuck Urban Meyer

    brown_mack_trophy_m501rb.jpg

  5. 1 minute ago, Atticus said:

    He probably doesn't need it for all of them. He just needs enough to create doubt that this was forced on these innocent LMTs.

    Reasonable doubt is the standard for criminal cases, not civil. 

    What Is the Burden in a Civil Trial?

    In a civil case the plaintiff makes the original allegations in a complaint and bears the initial burden. The defendant then files a responsive pleading denying some or all of the allegations and the burden shift to them to prove their defenses or counterclaim. Below is the burden in a civil trial:

    The Lowest Standard: Preponderance of the Evidence – The rules of civil procedure used by all U.S. Courts require that a plaintiff prove her case by a preponderance of the evidence. This roughly means a greater than 50% chance, based on all the reasonable evidence, that the defendant did the wrong that caused the damage. The defendant doesn’t have to do anything to defend their case if the plaintiff fails to prove their case by a preponderance of the evidence.

    What Is the Burden in a Criminal Trial?

    In a criminal trial, the burden of proof is always on the prosecution, as the defendant is presumed innocent. If the prosecution fails to prove guilt, the defendant does not need to prove anything. Below is the burden of proof in a criminal case:

    The Highest Standard: Beyond a Reasonable Doubt – A much higher burden than preponderance of evidence. The standard is that there is a great likelihood the accused committed the crime. Most courts refuse to attach any numbers to the phrase "beyond a reasonable doubt," but some people believe it means 90%, 95%, or even 99% sure.

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  6. 16 hours ago, elfenix said:

    I have to assume that flying someone in from Atlanta or wherever to sexually assault them is some sort of federal crime. Do we know if the FBI is looking at this at all?

    yeah the FBI takes these things very seriously 

    epstein-fbi-2-abc-er-190812_hpEmbed_4x3_

  7. 1 hour ago, Hook1997 said:

    I mean Watson is in the wrong but you can no longer practice your profession because someone touched your hand with their penis once, come on.

    Yeah, nah. 

    You may want to put yourself in their shoes for a second, these girls are actually pretty powerless and getting sexually harassed, it fucks them up. 

    Their job is to put their hands on dudes muscles to heal them, they get put in that same exact situation that they were in when the creeper fucked with them.

    • Hook 'Em 2
  8. 1 hour ago, Machinator said:

    (Scipio Tex) Sark Bites: First Edition

      Hide contents

    Welcome to a new feature: Sark Bites. As the name suggests, it's timely bite sized football program intel gleaned from reliable sources. Info that, because of time sensitivity or volume constraints, isn't found in the Humidor.

    Feature title runner up? Sarks Don't Sleep.

    **

    Sources we trust spoke to people very close to the program and here's some of the info that we can relate.

    - Sark is incredibly genuine and easy to interact with. He also communicated a real understanding that being successful at Texas required more than just being a football coach.

    - How is Texas different from Alabama? Well, aside from Tuscaloosa's stacked talent at every position and The Process burned deep into the culture, player academics and coursework are much more substantial at Texas. Even in player friendly classes. Most Texas players want an education. The Crimson Tide majored and minored in playing football.

    - About that talent level: the first string is competitive, but there's a substantial drop off to the 2nd and 3rd teams. Developing that depth is a priority.

    - Bijan is the best player on O. Collins is the best player on D. These should not be revelations for you.

    - Both QBs can run the system. Neither has separated. This is a true competition. There will be no anointing.

    - LB depth is a substantial concern. Given that, did the coaches try to talk Juwan Mitchell out of of the portal? No. They helped him pack his bags, called him an Uber (carpool) and packed him a warm bologna sandwich on white bread with no mayo or mustard. I may have embellished some portion of that for my own amusement.

    - Sark addressed Mitchell's portal entry immediately with the team: "We're trying to get this train moving. We're not stopping for one guy."

     

     

    Juwan Mitchell expecting the coaches to bend over backwards to keep him

    giphy.gif

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  9. 22 minutes ago, Superhero said:

    Follow up conversation from earlier:

    "Okay, I think WE just need about a dozen sandwiches, and this and that and this and that."

    "And by WE, you actually mean ME right?"

    "Yeah, the bakery gets really crowded, and you wake up earlier than me."

    "I'll go if you let me do you tonight."  (I'm such a romantic)

    "Nope, I'll just wake up early tomorrow."  (Didn't have sex, FML)

     

    In the morning, this was the monologue around the house:

    "Should I call them to order first?"
    "Do they have an online menu?"
    "The line is going to be long, so I should order first right?"
    "What if they're too busy to pick up the phone?"
    "If I order first, and they're too busy, then I'll have to wait for them to fill the order right?"

    This went on for 30 minutes. I told her to just go and check it out.

    She came back in 25 minutes with the sandwiches.

    how many wifes does it take to make a sandwich

    • Like 1
  10. 14 hours ago, MaybeACoordinator said:

    I want to clarify my position on this deal.

    1. I am not a Texans fan. In fact, I am an anti-fan of the Texans and have been since the Rosencopter game. I pull for whoever plays the Texans every week, and it has been one of the most satisfying fan relationships I have ever had. So many come from behind victories for my teams of the week....I don't think anyone has accused me of Texans fandom, but I just want that clarified. 

    2. I realize my skepticism can come across as misogynistic or idiotic when there are this many women coming out with similar stories. 

    3. I don't deny that Watson jizzed on multiple masseuses; I just believe that in most of these cases it will be found to have been consensual. As to the legality...I don't know. This seems almost akin to Louis CK's "I'm just gonna take it out and fap in front of you whether you like it or not," which would normally be a form of indecent exposure, but it all gets murky behind closed doors. Especially if there is a massage table behind those doors. 

    4. I realize grand conspiracy theories are often stupid.

    HOWEVER....

    1. Watson's contract dispute does not just pit him vs the Texans front office. It pits him against all 30 owners. If he gets his way here, the whole concept of superstar contracts will tilt drastically in the favor of players.

    2. The Texans front office is batshit crazy, the most lunatic and incompetent ownership group I've seen in decades of following the three major sports and understanding them as businesses. 

    3. Tony Buzbee is the most overrated trial lawyer in Texas history. He made his name in the court of Samuel Kent, his drinking buddy and now one of the very very few federal justices to lose his lifetime seat and go to prison. While investigating the sex harassment and assault cases that did him in, investigators kept getting distracted by all the extremely unethical shit he pulled from the bench, often when presiding over Buzbee's cases, to the point where the sex assault victims' attorneys had to keep reminding the investigators to keep their eyes on the ball, that the shady shit on the bench was beyond the purview of their investigation. If the feds wanted to, they could destroy Kent all over again on that stuff, but their work is done -- he is now a hermit out somewhere west of Fort Stockton.

    4. On top of that, Buzbee has been extremely erratic these past five years. Post-2016 divorce, he has purchased a tank and placed in front of his house, seemingly solely because he could and wanted to piss off his neighbors; had a hoochie mama in his house tumping wine on his Warhols; allowed a team of Joe Blow burglars from around the way to loot his house of millions in art, watches, and jewelry; and ran for mayor, and showed his very prominently showed his ass in one of the weirdest, drunkest public speeches I've ever seen.

    5. Which brings is to his conduct in pursuing this case. While the drip-drip of suits in this case is solid tactics, everything else has redefined shitshow: the rambling Insta screeds, increasingly edging towards cocaine-tinged paranoia; the self-aggrandizing Secret Agent Man photos of him posing dramatically on a tarmac, getting out of his Bentley; his clumsy attempts to paint these cases as being about "raising awareness"; and his lies about having turned over these cases to the cops. (He lied about it at the outset, and now one and only one of these plaintiffs has gone to the cops, not all of them, as he said happened weeks back.) I would not be surprised at all if some of his clients wind up suing him. He might even wind up facing sanctions before this is all over. 

    6. There is a credible sworn account testifying to at least one extortion attempt, and that in the most serious suit, the one where Watson allegedly forced a blow job.

    7. Against my better judgment, I will attempt to connect some of these dots. The Texans knew about Watson's kink but were content to let it slide until it became apparent he was a goner. When it become obvious to the rest of the owners that the Texans were about to ruin their leverage over superstar players, they told the Texans to release the Kraken and assumed that Cal McNair was up to the task of making the arrangements locally. And to them, I guess, the hiring of Buzbee would seem solid. To outsiders he sells himself well, and a good number of NFL owners are nowhere near as bright as they want you to think they are. 

    8. Because, I believe, the Texans have had a, um, hand in it, of course it's a circus. 

    9. Yes it's all bizarre and seemingly far-fetched, but I am a firm believer in following the money. The money -- the big money -- wants Watson taken down a peg or nine or even destroyed. And as we have seen, the billionaire boys club has brazenly colluded in front of the entire world to blackball a player whose political stance was nowhere near as threatening to their bottom lines as Watson's is. Watson was dumb enough to try his luck against all that with skeletons in his closet. 

    10. We are dealing with a franchise whose second-in-command is a dorky pastor who the Peter Principle would slot into the pulpit of a small megachurch in ex-urban Spartanburg, South Carolina. How is that any weirder than what I have written here?

    tl;dr

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