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Posts posted by DFW Horn
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Johnson's passing acumen seems less than ideal
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Just now, Brian Fantana said:
Why is that big dumb bitch Dvoracek still employed?
New-found sobriety?
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1 minute ago, The Hot Dog Buffet said:
I read it as he kicked his own ass with alcohol.
Ah...thanks for translating
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1 minute ago, TrashMaster G said:
You're talking about college co-eds. The no pedo qualifier is unnecessary.
Yes, most of 'em are at least 18
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1 minute ago, tbone_ said:
Can confirm as the dad of an asu junior. No pedo.
As the dad of a San Diego State freshman I can also confirm SDSU is right there with them. Still no pedo.
Have you been to Islands near the ASU campus for a burger/brew on the patio? Eye candy central
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Just now, SL Xpress said:
KSU used to be A&M. Their Potemkin village of a college town calls the center of it where the nightlife is based Aggieville. I would have put the equivalent of air quotes in that last sentence but then I realized I'd have to put quotation marks around pretty much every word.
Yes, I've been to Manhattan. I wanna know how & why he got his ass kicked by harmless KSU students/fans.
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1 minute ago, tbone_ said:
I’d probably pick ASU just based on what they have coming back, even without the Tasmanian devil running back.
I'll pick ASU, too, bc I like their grit. Plus, ASU co-eds are really hot.
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2 minutes ago, MNLonghornFUKM said:
aggieville vibes>whatever ISU has. got my ass kicked in Aggieville.
...did tailgate with the KState students who were harmless. ISU was good times.
Then how and why did you get your ass kicked in Aggieville? I'm confused
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2 minutes ago, The Ace of Aces said:
What a terrible terrible fumble.
* muff
Returner never possessed the ball
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15 minutes ago, Frank Drebin said:Their app state loss at home was very watchable.
This was my favorite, most watchable aggy game.
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Thanks, Coach. One more time for the good guys next week! 🤘
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2 minutes ago, jimmyjazz said:
So, you played weak side LB.
He played in the RGV. The bar isn't that high for QBs down there. Not too many Ty Detmers around
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45 minutes ago, BurntEyes said:
I would actually like to see Surly readership vs Texags for my boy Graham.
At this point, I'm almost convinced Graham is a Surly sock trolling aggy. @Beau Vine is the lead suspect, since he posts that drivel multiple times a week.
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8 hours ago, Topper13 said:
My mom used to make bologna and mayo sandwiches, on white bread. I do miss them.
Gross. Bologna and French's mustard on wheat + one Kraft cheese slice
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8 hours ago, Hank Chinaski said:
Fuck. Yes. I live in abq and have been screaming for them to get rid of the shitty cartoon lobo logos for years and slap a Zia on the helmet and work turquoise back into the unis. Grand fucking slam, UNM. These are damn near perfect.
Agree - the cartoon wolves do suck
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1 minute ago, texifornia said:
Ugly and doesn't look like Baylor. Meh.
Agreed, but the kids like shiny baubles and black.
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26 minutes ago, Hagbard Celine said:
a proper baseline for pairing discussions would include a thorough calculationof drive times from every campus to every other campus
i also choose to rank the football 'strength' of each school based on that school's rank in all time wins, compared only to current FBS teams
thus, i present you with:
the Official Drive-sydney-carton-Crazy SEC pairing model
TM 2025 The Legion of Dynamic Discord, Malabo, Equatorial Guinea
round 1: take out the immovable objects
Texas/0u
bama/barn
klan/klan aggy
florida/georgia
that leaves:
aggy
kentucky
lsu
missouri
pig
south carolina
tennessee
vandy
use geography for the other 4 pairings to match the immovable objects:
aggy/lsu
kentucky/south carolina (because reasons)
missouri/pig
tennessee/vandy
round 2: continue with geography - it doesn't have to be absolute on time/distance - but it must be regional
this round the top half of the conference (listed based on all-time wins) picks who they 'want' from teams 9-16 in all-time wins
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/NCAA_Division_I_FBS_football_win–loss_records
all time wins 1-8
3 alabama
5 Texas
6 0u
9 georgia
11 tennessee
12 lsu
14 barn
16 aggy
all-time wins 9-16
20 florida
25 pig
33 missouri
40 klan
51 kentucky
54 south carolina
63 vandy
76 klan aggy
top 8 choose in order:
bama takes klan
Texas takes pig (we should choose lsu but there is no way the league will let us have 3 pairings in the all-time top 8 with both 0u and lsu, so pig is the next 'makes most sense' choice)
0u takes missouri
georgia takes (or is made to take) south carolina (because reasons)
tennessee takes kentucky
lsu takes florida
barn takes vandy and they should thank the football gods for it
aggy gets klan aggy and they should thank the football gods for it
round 3 is a clusterfuck combination of league decisions, best geo, and reasons
5 Texas (paired w/ 6 0u & 25 pig), has to take 16 aggy by consolation and parasitic viral inhabitation, like breast larvae
20 florida (already paired w/ 9 georgia & 12 lsu) gets 54 south carolina (best geo, competitive balance, logical geo
25 pig (already paired w/ 33 missouri & 5 texas) gets 6 0u (best geo, and fixes competitive balance, tough 3rd pairing too bad so sad)
33 missouri (already paired w/ 25 pig & 6 0u) gets 51 kentucky (tied for next best geo w/ vandy, so has to be kentucky on competitive balance)
so to recap the following 8 are set (lower composite = more difficult)
5 Texas 6/16/25 (composite: 47)
6 0u 5/25/33 (composite: 63)
16 aggy 5/12/76 (composite: 93)
20 florida 9/12/54 (composite: 75)
25 pig 5/6/33 (composite: 44)
33 missouri 6/25/51 (composite: 82)
51 kentucky 11/33/54 (composite: 98)
54 south carolina 9/20/51 (composite: 80)
note that the median composite for the 8 that are sorted is 73
to this point 44 of 48 pairings make sense within the context of this model
the last 4 pairings .... are likely contentious, but it's easy to see the outside/in method is needed
last 8 teams remaining to assign their 3rd pairing & remaining geos ordered by distance:
3 alabama paired w/ 14 & 40 (54), geos: 76, 63, 9, 11, 12
9 georgia paired w/ 20 & 54 (64), geos: 11, 3, 63, 76
11 tennessee paired w/ 51 & 63 (104), going to have a very strong 3rd pairing, geos: 9, 3, 14, 76, 40, 12
12 lsu paired w/ 16 & 20 (36), geos: 76, 40, 3, 14, 63, 9, 11
14 barn paired w/ 3 & 63 (66), geos: 9, 76, 11, 63, 63, 40, 12
40 klan paired w/ 3 & 76 (79), geos: 63, 14, 12, 9, 11
63 vandy paired w/ 11 & 14 (25), needs a weaker 3rd pairing, geos: calcs probably not needed
76 klan aggy paired w/ 16 & 40 (36), geos: calcs probably not needed
so composites at this stage are 54, 64, 104, 36, 66, 79, 25 and 36
sorted ascending we get 25, 36, 36, 54, 64, 66, 79 and 104
recall the composite average for the sorted 8 is 73
outside/in method of addressing the last pairings would thus go in this order:
104, 25, 36, 36, 54, 64, 79 and 66
11 tennessee 104:
it's pretty clear that tennessee is going to have to play 3 bama or 9 georgia (for a final composite of 107 or 113)
63 vandy 25:
they are going to have to play 40 klan or 76 klan aggy (for a final composite of 103 or 139)
12 lsu 36 and 76 klan aggy 36:
let's see if one has to be taken to solve for geo or composite
3 bama 54:
last 4?
9 georgia 64:
last 4?
40 klan 79:
last 4?
14 barn 66:
last 4?
so let's channel snakey....
11 tennessee pairs with 9 georgia (best geo that's required for competitive balance + tv wants it)
12 lsu pairs with 40 klan (2nd best geo, + tv wants it)
we are down to
3 bama
14 barn
63 vandy
76 klan aggy
bama and barn already paired
vandy already paired with barn
klan aggy only one not paired with other 3
by default, these last 2 pairings are unavoidable:
3 bama pairs 63 vandy
14 barn pairs 76 klan aggy
SO this model produces the following:
5 Texas 6/16/25 (47)
6 0u 5/25/33 (63)
16 aggy 5/12/76 (93)
20 florida 9/12/54 (75)
25 pig 5/6/33 (44)
33 missouri 6/25/51 (82)
51 kentucky 11/33/54 (98)
54 south carolina 9/20/51 (80)
3 alabama 14/40/63 (117)
9 georgia 11/20/54 (88)
11 tennessee 9/51/63 (123)
12 lsu 16/20/40 (76)
14 barn 3/63/76 (142)
40 klan 3/12/76 (91)
63 vandy 3/11/14 (28)
76 klan aggy 14/16/40 (70)
sorted by (composite SoS), lower = harder, with pairings
63 Vanderbilt 3/11/14 (28): Alabama, Tennessee, Auburn
25 Arkansas 5/6/33 (44): Texas, 0u, Missouri
5 Texas 6/16/25 (48): 0u, aggy, pig
6 0u 5/25/33 (63): Texas, pig, Missouri
76 Mississippi State 14/16/40 (70): Auburn, aggy, MIssissippi
20 Florida 9/12/54 (75): Georgia, LSU, South Carolina
12 LSU 16/20/40 (76): aggy, Florida, Mississippi
54 South Carolina 9/20/51 (80): Georgia, Florida, Kentucky
33 Missouri 6/25/51 (82): 0u, pig, Kentuckee
average = 82.375, 9 above, 7 below
9 Georgia 11/20/54 (88): Tennessee, Florida, South Carolina
40 Mississippi 3/12/76 (91): Alabama, LSU, Mississippi State
16 aggy 5/12/76 (93): Texas, LSU, Mississippi State
51 Kentucky 11/33/54 (98): Tennessee, Missouri, South Carolina
3 Alabama 14/40/63 (117): Auburn, Mississippi, Vanderbilt
11 Tennessee 9/51/63 (123): Georgia, Kentucky, Vanderbilt
14 Auburn 3/63/76 (142): Alabama, Vanderbilt, Mississippi State
conclusions
georgia, aggy, bama and tennessee can just shut the fuck up about anything for the next 10 years
sorry vandy someone is going to end up as the punching bag in the first iteration and you're the private school - anchor down!
dear pig: welcome to the pleasuredome
to our friends from across the river: you'll figure out the new landscape and do justice to your history (snicker snicker)
dear corndog: wanna go halves on bribing the b1g to take aggy so we can fuck on the reg?
the one thing this model did not produce that will be bitched about is barn-georgia; vandy / south carolina, or tennessee / klan aggy would have to agree to a switch; i don't see tennessee agreeing to this as georgia is their only marquee game in this model; i suppose vandy and south carolina could agree to this, maybe? but it puts barn's feels ahead of rational geography; georgia and south carolina make sense; on the flip side columbia to nashville is only 7 hours; in this case vandy still has tenneessee and south carolina still has florida, so if it must be so.....
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Lol...





Farmageddon in Ireland: ISU vs KSU
in Football
Posted
How in the world did aggy make this list? It must've improved significantly this century.