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RPM

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by RPM

  1. FUCK NO.
  2. Kind of. Pull it a few feet at low speed until it slides off, then drop and reposition. Now if theys a hoe pounding one out in the back, you might run into more problems than Moe CooTow did trying that.
  3. Buckaroo never walked the streets of Kursk Oblast.
  4. Watters doesn't realize all straws aren't made by StoopsCo
  5. RPM

    Landman

    Billy Bob, Hamm, Demi.
  6. That's why you should stick with Uncle Gashsmasher, the Earl of Poon. He'll be on Steve Noviello's show Monday Night. BTW, as a card carrying homosexual, Steve has endorsed the return of Gay or Not Gay.
  7. Me thinks he protests too much.
  8. Like Mozart and Picasso.
  9. I thought things were clearly marked.
  10. Could be she's 45 and had 3 kids.
  11. este
  12. I wonder if Chickadoo is a real thing because I think I want some.
  13. I know a guy, former DA (D) that was out of office for many years , but still popular and the seat was open. He tried to register his campaign with the Republican Party because he knew there was a less than zero chance as a Democrat and they turned him away. Wound up running Independent and came in 2nd.
  14. Not at The Venetian, but I had a scorpion crawl up my pants leg at home. I was sitting with my legs crossed reading a magazine (you remember those) and felt an itch on my inner thigh next to El Guapo & Friends. I scratched it and all hell broke loose. I jumped out of the recliner trying to grab the motherfucker with my left while undoing my belt and blue jeans with the right (which I did in record time) while inventing break dancing. I stood there with my pants around my ankles and my right leg on fire. I counted 13 stings over 6 inches. Scorpion? He ded, but I smashed TF out of it anyway.
  15. RPM

    Getting old sucks

    Statins are your friend.
  16. Going by that metric, my obit will read "Nationally known Celebrity TV chef passes away" which is utter bullshit, but you could connect some dots.
  17. Been rewatching and I'm halfway through S2. Holy shit all the great actors that show up in bit parts. So far Edie Falco, Lee Tergesen, Jake Gyllenhaal, Luis Guzmán, Wilford Brimley... impressive.
  18. No, aggy cold fusion will be at the same point when Mr Fusion is on HEB shelves. They just ran out of time.
  19. Easy. You transport to a time where HEB sells Mr. Fusion (when they are open).
  20. 2 burritos at 380 for 12 min. Flip at 6 min. Let them sit for a couple minutes or risk incinerating the roof of your mouth.
  21. You did it wrong. Air Fryer turns them magical.
  22. It's pretty easy to be a successful politician when you have no soul, love to grift and are a yuge attention whore.
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