Everything posted by Modessit
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Shit My Kid Says
No, the proper response to "I forgot my..." after you've left the house, truck, whatever is to say "Oh well. Guess you'll remember next time." And then you leave without it. And he can suffer not having his phone, wallet, whatever. My kids have learned that if they want to have their tablets, Switch, or whatever then it's their responsibility to bring them, bring charging cords, and bring headphones so I don't have to listen to it in the car. If they forget headphones then they can't use their electronics (because even when they "turn the sound down" it invariably gets turned up again and I can hear it). If the battery dies because they forgot charging cords then they can look out the window. They always bug my wife to use her phone when their battery dies and I told her to quit giving it to them because it's for her, not them. They know better than to ask for mine.
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Post a pic that makes you say "Holy shit."
Black SUV was stolen and thief died despite people trying to get him out. Car caught fire and poof.
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Post a pic that makes you say "Holy shit."
Dude was gonna wreck regardless of whether he hit that truck. That's a T intersection and at that speed he was toast.
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Post a pic that makes you say "Holy shit."
Assuming the speed of the bike stays constant, she's fine. Helps that she held onto his shirt, though, so if the bike speeds up she would be pulled along.
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Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do
I once had a cat that got "cat aids". (I forget the actual name but they described it as "basically AIDS but for cats.) By the time it has symptoms to even know this diagnosis, it's too late for the cat and it usually dies within 48 hrs.
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Lame joke thread
From my 9yo: What has four letters and sometimes has nine.
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Baker Mayfield is a piece of shit catchall thread
The problem is he's supposed to be throwing footballs.
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Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do
Yes but I was trying to convey they were from the same branch rather than a cousin from elsewhere. The LFL mom was hot in college. Never saw the Nuggets mom back then so no idea.
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Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do
And I recently found out that cousin's sister has a kid who started this year as a dancer for the Denver Nuggets:
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Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do
But I've posted pics of a cousin's kid who I found out used to play in the LFL:
- Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do
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Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do
I've posted a pic of my daughter. She was 8 months old and doing 'hook'em horns' in her sleep.
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Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do
Exactly. "What are you getting?" I always answer: "Why? Just get what you want." If she keeps bugging me, I tell her I'm getting "Food." Then she's pissed off*. I used to think it was because if she was thinking about getting the same thing then she would get her other choice and then eat hers and have "just a taste" of mine so she could enjoy both dishes. But then she learned I don't share from my plate. Now I think it's because she can't actually make a decision and is hoping what I'm ordering sounds good so she can get the same thing. It's also why she rarely will order before me because she's undecided. Unless we're at a specific place she wanted to go to for a specific reason - like pancakes. Then she knows what she wants before we get there. *I'm not getting laid anyway, so what do I care?
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Post a pic that makes you say "Holy shit."
At least now my wife won't want to go to Galveston this summer.
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Post a pic that makes you say "Holy shit."
Mythbusters did it better with the mega fire extinguisher.
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Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do
I tell her she's not my mother. I take the kids somewhere and tell them to pick stuff out for Mothers Day. They get things they think she likes. I veto some things (no, we're not getting her a pack of spearmint gum. Keep looking.) and make some suggestions. They got her flowers, chocolate, and some new slippers since she's been complaining about hers. I paid for it. She knows that. But I wasn't even in the room when they gave her their gifts. I got flowers for my mom. If the kids are old enough, let them shop for her. If she doesn't like the gifts tell her to complain to the kids. If the kids are really little, then you need to step up even if she already got the same thing. If she complains, tell her you bought yours first (even if you didn't).
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Quinn "La Joya" Ewers - The Man The Myth The Mullet, Now Starting for the Miami Dolphins
I heard he was more worried about the future of pork bellies, which is used to make bacon, which you might find in a bacon, lettuce, and tomato sandwich.
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Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do
Then she spends 2 hours redoing what took me 5 minutes.
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Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do
Yep. She even stops to think about it before asking my help with anything because she knows she's relinquishing control. Once I've agreed to help, it's now my thing, not hers. Saves me from a bunch of crap.
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Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do
I taught my wife early that she can either watch or help me do it the way I want to do it, or she can do it herself. She doesn't get to tell me how to do it. Been fine ever since. If she's tempted, I just stop and ask if she wants to do it. Sometimes she does and I go do whatever I want elsewhere. Otherwise she goes away and leaves me alone. Short version: If I'm doing it, then I'll do it my way. Don't like it? Do it yourself.
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Get rich/famous scheme. Kill husband then write children's book on dealing with grief.
When I was in high school in RR, a girl I was casually friends with was killed by "accidental discharge" while visiting a friend (that I didn't know) at his house. Apparently there were several teenagers there and someone was playing with or holding a gun and it fired and struck her in the head. I never got more details than that at the time. 20+ years later I'm married and my wife (who grew up mostly in Liberty Hill) tells me a story from when she was 7 and living in RR about how her brother had some friends over and was fooling around with a gun and accidentally killed a girl in his bedroom. Yep. Same girl. Brother never got charged, and still owned guns for years. Cheated on his wife, divorced (with 3 kids), moved to Dallas, became an alcoholic, developed major kidney and liver disease, and died last year. We rarely spoke to him and only saw him twice in the 16 years from when we got married to when he died.
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Bo Knows Hiccups.
The only superpower I have is the ability to stop the hiccups if I ever get them. Never lasts more than 3 hiccups. I don't know how I do it, but I just decide "okay, quit doing that" and it stops. Drives my wife nuts as she deals with them for 10-20 minutes at a time and sees me do it once or twice and then nothing. Not sure what costume Stops Hiccuping Man would wear.
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Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do
That was @LTbear whose wife liked to watch him fuck other chicks and joined in at times. Not sure if she still does.
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Texas A&M-Texarkana Player Hit By Stray Bullet During Game
Didn't see this posted in my quick perusals. https://www.reuters.com/world/us/college-baseball-player-struck-by-stray-bullet-during-game-texas-2023-05-01/ Tl;dr version: Shootout in nearby neighborhood. Player standing next to bullpen hit in the chest. Currently in ICU.
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Deion Sanders "Coach Prime" Now At Colorado
Chris Simms?