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Superhero

Certifiably Surly
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About Superhero

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  1. I'm going to go out on a limb and said it was an accident.
  2. Now we now why you put up with Trixie. Now we just need pictures of @wood's wife.
  3. I have the MOST bizarre dreams. Last night's dream involved drinking margaritas with coworkers, stealing my boss's Lexus supercar (which doesn't exist), killing perceived enemies with a sharp tool that I jab into their bodies and injecting them with a poison from a spray bottle connected to the large needle, preventing a younger coworker from killing me in the same manner by jabbing him first, trying to get to an airport to catch a plane - the GPS said it was a 30 minute walk, but the taxi driver, (Uber doesn't exist) in a beat up white sedan said it would take 3 hours, 2 if he drove really fast, sharing 3 hotels rooms, one which is wedge shaped, between 5 people, my wife cheating with one of the VPs and acting nonchalant about it, getting lost on the streets of a south American town, meeting a family dressed like they're from the 1950s, not on the 1st floor of the airport because that's for arrivals, not the 3rd floor because that's departures, but on Level 2, and parking in a parking lot with the steepest drop off... But what does it all mean?
  4. Brake > clutch
  5. I’m not your guy, friend.
  6. My daughter was mad at my wife this morning because my wife changed her alarm time. When I asked her why she needed so much time in the morning. Her: Because I have to do this and that and yada yada yada… and I’m not you, I don’t wear a uniform. Me: ??? Her: You always wear gray slacks and just a different shirt.
  7. lol. I did a double take because that guy (old Asian man) dresses like my dad. And that something my dad would totally do.
  8. Background: I'm responsible for managing our office's budget. I dread looking at the reports every month because it's fucking tedious. Whenever invoices come in, the receptionist will process them, kick them up to the office manager for first level approval. Anything above $1,000 gets kicked up to me for approval. It doesn't take a lot of time, but it's just one more thing to do. So before my office manager went on maternity leave, she asked if I could do the first level of approvals which she is usually responsible for. I said fine. But holy fucking shit, I get at least 20-30 requests everyday. Our receptionist is new and scatterbrained. Instead of ordering a bunch of stuff at once, I get invoices for a box of paper, 2 boxes of paper, a bag of mints, 2 cases of water... I asked the receptionist to consolidate her orders, but nope, still getting multiple a day. Fucking tedious and takes me away from my main work.
  9. The guy with the chair looked like an employee. He either gets no tip, or a giant one. I guess it depends on who's got the check. Lol at the waitress running in at 0:08 to save a menu. And from Reddit...
  10. Aren't you also the connoisseur of the brisket seasoned with liquid smoke and cooked in a metal turkey pan?
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